THE NUMEROLOGY OF 12/12

The numerology of 12/12 is a portal to cultivate awareness of how we show up in relationships, says Felicia BenderArtwork: Giulia Bersani

couple smoking cigarettes the numerology of 12/12 The Numinous

In Numerology, when we experience repeating number patterns it brings meaning and influence. It sets up a certain “vibe” or portal of energy from which to operate on a more evolved and optimal level.

The date 12/12 is no exception.

This combination is an intriguing mix because the energy of the 1 is focused on you—your independence and individuality. While the energy of the 2 brings in the need and desire for partnership, connection, and unity.

The numerology of 12/12 offers the energy to contemplate and make solid changes with how you show up for your relationships. And even if you’re resistant to making changes in this area, this number combination will force your hand. Often a transformation will be driven by forces you consider outside of your immediate control.

The numerology of 12/12 also offers a new start in some sort of relationship—or relationships—in your life. Business, intimate, family, or friends. 12/12 is bringing a frequency of change that focuses on relationships.

The number 1 is all about understanding your sense of yourself as an independent entity and the number 2 focuses on your relationship both with yourself and with others—so the numerology of 12/12 also has walks the path between yin and yang, masculine and feminine. And the harmonizing of the two within yourself and within your world.

So while this day offers a portal of energy encouraging dynamic transformation within one or more of your key relationships, it also reminds us to define healthy boundaries while also asking for and accepting the loving support of others. It’s a delicate balance to be sure, and yet a vital and expansive opportunity for us if we’re open to starting something new and different in the relationship realm.

:: 3 Ways to Optimize the Vibe of 12/12 ::

Get Real. As Dr. Phil might say: “And how’s that workin’ for ya’?” Ask yourself this question about your key relationships and lay yourself bare in your openness to the answer.

Take Action. The number 1 is not about contemplation, it thrives with action. Don’t think about it for too long. Forgo analysis paralysis and do what needs to be done.

Expose Your Heart. The number 2 is all about love, diplomacy, and emotional acuity. The danger is in folding yourself into others’ expectations and losing yourself in the process. So do evaluate your next move with love and compassion. Both toward yourself and toward others.

COMFORTABLY NUMB: JUST SAY NO TO PEOPLE-PLEASING

Used to numbing out her own needs by being hyper-helpful, Kate Atkinson has been learning how to just say “NO” to people-pleasing…

beyonce giving the finger flipping the bird the numinous

“We’re all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn’t. We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities, we are eaten up by nothing.” – Charles Bukowski

People have asked a couple of things of me this month. You know, the usual friend favors. It happens daily right? Do you think you could walk my dog? Can I borrow some cash until the end of the month? Hey, would you mind checking over my resume? I’ve done it myself plenty of times, and given these small acts of good will in return. Natural right? Favors and back-scratching are a part of life…except that recently, I haven’t felt so accommodating.

In fact, there have been a few requests in lately where I’ve felt like saying: “do you know what actually—no.” Except that I won’t. Instead, I will let the emails fester in my inbox until they’ve burned a hole in my psyche, turning them over and over in my head until I think I am going to explode.

That’s right, I’m a “yes” wo(man). As in, I really don’t know how to say “no.” Like a narcotic, I get high on my own hyper-helpfulness—every email a ping of serotonin: “I got this.” Except that running on a treadmill of responsiveness has become exhausting, and these days I don’t know who I’m running the race for.

My “yes” complex has also proven to be a useful numbing strategy, when I’ve got sucked so far down the vortex of helping and fixing I fail to see things as they really are—acting so quickly to keep others happy that my own, likely un-met, needs become irrelevant. There’s an old adage that resentment is like letting someone live rent free in your head. And if that’s the case, I’ve been letting out an entire Brooklyn apartment block to a bunch of freaks.

In my research about how to get better at saying “no,” here’s my number one discovery—the modern way of affirming negative goes something like this: say nothing at all. Repeat.

In this always-connected age, the pretend-I-just-didn’t-get-the-memo is what comes out trumps. Ignore it, and hopefully it will disappear. But what’s it doing to us, this radio silence? And like, why can’t we just be fucking honest with each other? What I want to know is, when was the last time you said “no” to someone, guilt free?

Try it:

“No, I am not coming to that dinner because I think the people are extremely shallow and self absorbed.”

“No, I won’t head over when your boyfriend’s out of town because you didn’t answer my call when I needed you.”

“No, I won’t work for you for free because actually—what the blimmin’ heck have you done for me lately?”

Feels great right?

This is because, as Melodie Beattie writes in The Language of Letting Go: “When we learn to say no, we stop lying. People can trust us, and we can trust ourselves. All sorts of good things happen when we start saying what we mean…(and) we don’t have to offer long explanations for our decisions.”

Rewind to a me watching a talk by the inimitable Marina Abramovic. The outspoken Russian and her pal Laurie Anderson both had a fair bit to say about living vs dying, and both were riffing on codes to live by…how we are to get the most out of our lives in the limited time that we have on earth.

The theme that came through loud and strong was the importance of marching to the beat of one’s own drum. To cut it with the people-pleasing, and find your own voice. Because, to put it simply: YOLO.

Words that have sunk in, this past month, to a backdrop of several people in my circle suddenly dropping like flies. No morbid details, rather to say that sometimes, suddenly, you are served a brutal reminder that our days in this life are limited.

So how can we stop people-pleasing, and spend our precious hours crafting a life we want?
By getting comfortable that you’re going to miss out. By getting down with the fact that it’s okay to not show up when people “need” you sometimes. By realizing that you only get one life, and that while friends and intimacy are important, not for one second are you here to live your life for someone else. By realizing that while some people might bitch you out, your real mates are going to stick around.

N-O. Say it. Say it louder! Time to stop pepping with the yes pills. And settle into the headspace that comes from realizing that less can most definitely be more.

SHE’S ELECTRIC: READING FOR THE ARIES NEW MOON

The Aries New Moon is here to spark the next current of your personal evolution. Hannah Ariel explains how to max out the electrifying cosmic energy…

aries new moon fireworks on The Numinous

If there is one astrological phenomenon we can count on to be even more invigorating to our consciousness than the monthly New Moon itself, it is the annual New Moon that takes place in a CARDINAL FIRE sign; a New Moon in ARIES; and, this coming April 7, a New Moon conjunct URANUS in Aries, at that.

Over the past five years, all moon cycles beginning in Aries have, to some extent, sparked our Uranian capacity to become agents of radical change in our own lives. Since 2011, not one person can say they haven’t experienced some type of an inner revolution. A fundamentally microcosmic life altering realization, that has led to the total reformation of a past ideal.

Along the way, each Aries New Moon has been a tipping points in our ability to creatively break out of seemingly impossible-to-change, consistently stuck-in-our-own-way patterns. And in exchange for freeing ourselves from the old, each Aries New Moon cycle has helped us find new and immediately effective ways to develop new parts of ourselves. Like, innovative, far-reaching, freaky-deaky-ridiculously magical parts of our beings. Everything from the way we think, to he way we make decisions and navigate our relationships has been somehow challenged over the past five years, as if begging for an upgrade.

On April 7 2016 we will experience once more the shockingly electric energy of Uranus conjunct the Moon in Aries – but this time even more powerfully so, as Uranus will be right by this Moon’s side. The impact it will have on us as individuals depends on our willingness to continue to confidently divert from the norm, from what has been before, and embrace what are revealed as exciting new ways of being.

Before you read any further – pause, and think back in time to one year ago. Who were you then? What understanding did you have of yourself? How has that person changed since then? Now go back to just six months ago. How had you begun integrating those changes? What or who were you in the process of becoming more of? Now, come back to this very moment. How have you completely TRANSFORMED since one year ago? What has fundamentally changed?

The question NOW, is what will the part of you that remains do next?

See, an Aries New Moon is all about YOU, the individual; YOU, as a traveler through space and time; YOU, as the hero/heroine of your own personal journey; and all that YOU have brought into existence. And as it is your tale that is dynamically unfolding, it is only you who knows what comes next.

There’s no doubt that there will be some degree of serendipity at work – IF, that is, you tune into your story and what it’s telling you. This is a time to come alive with excitement about where these changes in your personality are taking you. And you can trust that whatever you have built on is here to stay this time around. For the first time in since Uranus entered fiery Aries, SATURN, the planet of karma, the planet that structures our whole reality in real time, is in a visionary fire sign of SAGITTARIUS.

In aspect to one another, this Aries New Moon is positively ensuring that we will be creating more stability for ourselves with the eventful actions we are taking now as an expression of our individuality – the true source of all fantastic Uranian breakthroughs.

To work with this energy on an even deeper level, we can also look to decipher the intention that lies behind the very degree that this Aries New Moon takes place – the 18th degree of Aries. The Sabian Symbol (a deeply symbolic channeled image) for this degree as stated in Dane Rudhyar’s Astrological Mandala, is: “An empty hammock stretched between two trees. A constructive alternation of activity and rest, referring to the ability to balance outer vitalistic activity and withdrawal from such activity… which suggests a middle path between total involvement in instinctual or social drives and withdrawal in silence – thus living rhythmically.”

And so this Aries New Moon is an invitation to stretch your consciousness to hold both polarities: the part of yourself ready for immediate action, AND the part of yourself that knows how to hold back to develop your ideas in private.

As much as this is a time to act on all the electricity that is being stirred up externally in your life, it will also serve you to consider ways you can tap into the quietly imaginative recesses of your consciousness, where your most unique and the magical solutions can take shape. Uranus in Aries energetically brings the future to the present moment and embodies the very idea that when every individual takes action from a place that includes a vision of the far-flung future, the present moment becomes ECSTATIC and can “contain multitudes.”

The key to unlocking the gifts of this Aries New Moon will be to proactively seek an electrifying source of inspiration from within you, to be open the many possibilities you hold, and to align with the adventure of who you are becoming. And to remember all you have gone through to become who you are now. The answers to what kind of actions to take in light of your current circumstances will spring forth as soon as you allow yourself to embody the power of both creation and recreation.

As an empowering mantra for ALL sun signs at this time, I’m including the below poem – some carefully selected bits and pieces from sections of Walt Whitman’s brilliant Song of Myself:

(3.) There was never any more inception than there is now
(20.) I exist as I am, that is enough
And I know the amplitude of time
I am afoot with my vision
(51.) The past and present wilt – I have fill’d them, emptied them,
And proceed to fill my next fold of the future.

Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)

To book a personal reading with Hannah contact: neptuned.in@gmail.com

TIME FOR CHANGE: 10 SIGNS I WAS LIVING A LIE

As Mercury goes retrograde, the coming three weeks are the perfect time for some life laundry. For Victoria Cox, this meant asking: “am I living a lie?” Artwork: Aneta Ivanova via Behance.net
Aneta Ivanova on The Numinous

It’s an unsettling feeling to look back on the last decade of your life, only to discover that you’ve been living a lie. No, I haven’t recently been arrested for identity theft nor do I want to be the next Caitlyn Jenner. What I mean by living a lie is this: upon looking back at the arc of my burgeoning adulthood, I was astounded to discover that the career choices I had made, had never, in fact, been the choices I wanted to make.

There was no gun being held to my head. I made these decisions entirely voluntarily. Succumbing to my own burning desire to please others, I began to emulate a path that would impress my father. Abandoning my creative desires, I launched headfirst into a career in law.

Essentially, I took on what had been one of his ambitions and pursued his goal for myself. All, I can see now, in the hope that he would love me just a little bit more. Of course I didn’t realize what I was up to until much later in life, that’s the power of the subconscious mind. But there were signs along the way, tiny whispers asking if this was truly what I wanted.

Ultimately, it was finally paying attention to these signs that opened my eyes to the fact I’d been faking it all along.

SADNESS: The first sign was the persistent, heavy sadness that was my constant companion. I spent so long convincing myself that I was doing the right thing that I simply chose to ignore it. I knew it wasn’t normal to feel this way, but it took me years to confront my sadness and ask myself that terrible question. The one you don’t want to ask because you already know you don’t want to hear the answer. “Why are you really doing this?”

FEAR: Then there was the fear – fear of making any changes to my life. So, cushioned by my regular paycheck, I chose to play it safe. I convinced myself that it was the fear of losing my job that kept me awake at night, when actually I was afraid of something completely different. I was afraid I was missing out on living MY life.

RESISTANCE: I had always wanted to be a writer, yet I never wrote. Instead of putting pen to paper and creating a story, I created a litany of excuses. I was too busy, too stressed and this was killing off any creative inspiration. What I was really doing was a classic case of self-sabotage; I was refusing to get out of my own way.

Aneta Ivanova on The Numinous

DISTRACTION: I would do anything to avoid facing up to the truth of my situation. Cue night after night when, instead of turning on my laptop to write, I poured myself a glass of wine and checked in to see what The Real Housewives were up to. Anything to divert myself from… myself.

EMOTIONAL GUIDANCE: Sensing my malaise, a friend suggested I try a meditation class. Once my monkey mind finally settled I discovered a sense of peace I hadn’t felt in years. Meditation began to show me the true purpose of emotions and how they can actually provide valuable guidance. Quieting my mind had highlighted the fact that anxiety and fear were my sole companions while I was at work. In stark contrast, I discovered that the only time I felt any semblance of joy was in a creative environment.

BOREDOM: Another sign that showed me I was living an inauthentic life was a constant sense of boredom. I was bored by my work and bored with life. I would plan vacation after vacation in the hopes of brushing up against some kind of enjoyment, but nothing excited me anymore. The world seemed to have become one, long, monotonous…nothing.

ILLNESS: Being stressed and unhappy takes its toll on the mind, and on the body. My body decided to give me a sign of its own making, a physical wake-up call. My skin reverted to its teenage years and broke out constantly. I had severe insomnia and my adrenals were burnt out. My body was essentially screaming at me to get my attention the only way it knew how, through sickness.

IDENTITY LOSS: Despite the fact that I was desperate to change my career I hid behind my profession. I used my identity as a lawyer to impress people, because I was too afraid to show them who I really was. Ironically I spent so long holding up this mask as a “successful lawyer” that it was no longer a mask. I had morphed into somebody that I didn’t want to be.

Aneta Ivanova on The Numinous

SELF-LOATHING: I was disgusted by the realization that I had let fear hold me back from pursuing my creative dreams. In an attempt to remove these loathsome thoughts circling around my mind, I began journaling every evening. A torrent of hateful words poured forth providing another sign I desperately needed before I could move forward. I now needed to forgive myself.

PERSPECTIVE: The act of writing out my deepest fears in my journal showed me that I was stuck in a victim mentality. Instead of throwing a 24-hour pity party, what I needed was a change in perspective. Why was I choosing to hide this experience in the Life Mistakes folder, when I could file it under Life Lessons instead? Looking at my situation from a fresh perspective showed me that my experience had actually created a swath of writing material. What if I chose to write about my story so that it could help others who were in the same boat?

I’m still a long way off from the writing career of my dreams but that’s the not the point. The point is that each step of my journey has shown me I was living life out of duty rather than desire; acting always to please others rather than pleasing myself.

I hid behind my fears because I didn’t want to face up to the fact that in order to follow my writing dreams, I had to let go of those parts of my life that no longer served me. Yet the very act of finally facing these fears gave me the permission I had been desperately seeking; the permission to pull off the mask of inauthenticity and show my real self to the world.

STARCHILD TAROT INTERVIEW: PLUS 5 DECKS YOU NEED TO KNOW

Tarot is having a moment. And with more artists than ever bringing forth new versions of the classic Tarot, it’s never been easier to unleash your inner reader and find a deck that sings to you! Whether you’re a witchy mama looking for something a little more macabre, or a Kundalini goddess in search of some high vibes, there is a deck out there with your name on it.

To aid your search, we’ve rounded up five hot off the press tarot obsessions, kicking things off with an interview with the goddess behind The Starchild Tarot, Danielle Noel, about her special edition Akashic Records deck. By Gabriela Herstik.

Starchild Tarot creator Danielle Noel interview for The Numinous
Starchild Tarot creator Danielle Noel

The Numinous: First off, we love that you’re including the Akashic Records as a card in the major arcana of your new deck. What will the card represent?
Starchild Tarot: Thank you! I have always thought of the Akashic records as a source of mystery and divine information. At first, it was a somewhat abstract concept to grasp. When I was younger and just beginning to understand its significance, I imagined ancient manuscripts containing hidden and sacred knowledge, and thought, “how can I access this?” Now I understand the ‘Akashic Records’ as an energetic source which contains various frameworks of spiritual truths, with information pertaining to yourself, your life paths, incarnations, and the Universe at large. When you work with the cards, you have access to this information too, and are essentially connecting with the endless possibilities available to you.

The Akashic Records card of this special edition comes after the traditional 21st card (The World/The Universe), as a bridge beyond this holistic key, which I think connects well with how we are evolving at this time on our planet. I truly believe that a shift is currently taking place – energies are being enhanced and polarized, insights and sacred knowledge are rising to the surface like never before, and we are being forced to really think about our own enlightenment, mortality, and collective consciousness. This card taps into the acknowledgement of yourself as more than a physical being. It encourages you to take note of your own karmic imprints, and to consider the sacred knowledge that is being offered to us all at this time.

TN: Your imagery is super feminine and dreamy. Do you think that sort of energy in a deck makes it easier for the reader to access the Akashic Records?
ST: Certain sacred spaces and forms of sacred geometry are very activating, which is why I incorporate particular sites, colours, and symbols throughout this deck. This one also has a lot of pastel hues (pink and corals in particular) which connect with the heart chakra. My intention with each image is to inspire your imagination and intuition, through the layering of various visual triggers and healing modalities.

The Starchild Taror Akashic Records card on The Numinous

TN: Do you have a favorite card in this new deck? Why? (We won’t tell the others!)
ST: I have to say I really love the “Akashic Records” card. The image seems like one of the strongest visual portals that come up, and I’m curious to see how people will respond to it. Each symbol, colour, and portion of that card plays significant role in its interpretation. I have a deep fascination and love for Thoth and the emerald tablets, as well as the history of Atlantis, so those keys are also embedded in the image.

TN: What else is different about the new deck?
ST: There are a lot of new cards, which came from the desire to keep making new “gateways,” and the style for this deck is also slightly different than its predecessor. I added a lot of hand painted layers and watercolour textures, and it is much less “collage” based and more illustrative. Some of the cards from the original Starchild Tarot have remained in the Akashic edition, however, they have each been modified with painted overlays and new details.

Throughout the Major Arcana I have also added “Spiritual Keys” to help each reader along their journey into the Akashic records. These categories (Chakras, Gemstones, Guides, Symbols, Astrological/Planetary) can be used to expand your knowledge when working with a specific card, or to apply meditative and/or magical practices throughout the use of the Starchild Tarot. I have also added two new spreads in the guidebook (The Akashic Spread & Metatron Spread).

TN: Is creating collages on the cards a meditative experience for you? How does it aid your own journey with the Tarot?
ST: Meditation and energy work has been a huge part of my life over these past few years, and creating the cards has gone hand in hand with these explorations. I always start with the backgrounds which are ALL familiar to me in some way or another. Many of them come from photographs from my own travels, or of sacred sites from around the globe.

Our planet has so many activation points, with many of the great monuments working as chakras within the energy grid of Gaia. To acknowledge and respect these points honors the interconnectedness of us all, as they illustrate our history and spiritual evolution. The Tarot is a simple yet complex visual representation of ancient stories and concepts, and I think about this when I am creating the images. Somehow, they act as smaller pieces to a much larger cosmic puzzle.

The Hoodwitch, a.k.a. Bri Luna, as The High Priestess
The Hoodwitch, a.k.a. Bri Luna, as The High Priestess

TN: How do you choose the incredible real-life women featured in your decks?
ST: I’ve been lucky to have crossed paths with some amazing women and light workers, and when I began creating the decks, I thought that by integrating these guides, the energy of the cards would be enhanced through the powerful intention and co-creation that was put into the imagery. They are mediums, tarot readers, energy healers and others, who all share a common love for the Tarot and Magick overall.

TN: Which deck did you learn on, and what other decks are in your practice today?
ST: The first deck I ever purchased was a second-hand copy of ‘The Aquarian Tarot’ – I found it at a local flea market, and strangely, it had two Ace of Swords! After that, I learned on the ‘Tarot of a Moongarden’ and the ‘Thoth’ Tarot, but there are so many decks that I now love and appreciate. I also love that more and more people are tapping into the Tarot as a tool for self-healing and learning, and it doesn’t surprise me that it’s become so popular.

I think this comes from the “waking up” process that’s happening – there is a need for more spiritual outlets, as people are recognizing the importance of introspection, and the existence of more than what we see “on the surface”. Currently, the decks I use the most are my own, The Aquarian Tarot, The Klimt Tarot, Spiritspeak Tarot, The Goddess Tarot, and the Thoth Tarot.

TN: What’s the one thing that you want people reading your cards to know?
ST: There are many hidden layers and symbols in this deck. These were added as activation tools, so I am curious to see how they will be received. I have put a lot of love into this project, and hope that each person who reads the cards will be able to build their own relationship with the images and interpretations. That is my intention: I hope you feel supported and cared for when using these cards.

I would also like to point out that this new deck is not a replacement of the first, rather a special edition that opens up new insights. I am going to be re-releasing the “first edition” in the new year, so both decks will be available for sale, along with my future Moonchild Tarot, which is the shadow companion to The Starchild decks. I’m also working with a writer, and together we are creating a very special Oracle deck that I can’t wait to share in the not so distant future!

Starseedtravels.com

:: 5 MORE DECKS YOU NEED TO KNOW ::

The Wild Unknown second edition deck on The Numinous

The Wild Unknown Second Edition 
The Wild Unknown has quickly become a cult classic and with good reason. The wilderness inspired deck speaks to our innermost existence with its beautiful imagery, so it comes as no surprise that the Universe seems to be vibin’ at a higher frequency (read major excitement) at the release of the Second Edition deck. Although most cards remain the same as in the first edition, the cards illustrator Kim Krans has chosen to revisit are absolutely stunning – and help infuse readings with a colorful new energy.

The Four of Swords is bathed in a radiant blue green aura, Temperance is complimented with a sweet rainbow background and The Lovers scream “relationship goals” now more than ever, with cotton candy colors woven behind the two geese. The icing on the cake? A new, more in depth, fold out guide to each card. Although the old saying, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” reads true most of the time, we’re happy The Wild Unknown chose to ignore it on this occasion.

Thewildunknown.com

The Fountain Tarot deck on The Numinous
The Fountain Tarot

The Fountain Tarot
Deeply cosmic, The Fountain Tarot speaks to our unyielding need to find a deeper connection to the Universe we inhabit, and the souls who walk alongside us. The journey to this fountain of bliss starts as soon as you open the silver holographic fantasy of a box the cards reside in. From here, a greeting stating “you are the breath and voice of Universes” on the inside cover, sets the tone.

Designed and written by Jason Gruhl, Jonathan Saiz and Andi Todaro, the surreal imagery of each card allows an exploration of the sacred point where inner purpose meets outer expression. Perhaps most notably in The Fountain card itself, number “infinity,” which invites us to “surrender to that which you are, whole and perfect.” An invitation to remember that at our core, our true self is so much greater than we recognize.

Fountaintarot.com

The Serpentfire Tarot sixth edition deck on The Numinous
The Serpentfire Tarot sixth edition

Serpentfire Tarot Sixth Edition
The colorful, dreamlike landscape of the Serpentfire deck by Devany Wolfe is unparalleled – and so totally Numinous. This deck is a beautiful tribute to the Goddess in us all, with an exploration of Kundalini energy woven throughout. These cards are for the dreamers, the seekers, the weavers, and those who feel an affinity to the Universe around them, even (especially) when it seems almost too big for their grasp.

Collages appear in some capacity in almost every card, from The Lovers personified as two wolves howling at a cosmic pyramid exploding with jewel-toned bliss, to The World being held over a Goddesses head with the Moon phases interlaced on top. This is no mundane magick. From the exquisite sacred geometry collage on the back of each card, to the brightly colorful, vibrantly infused and completely otherworldly art created by Wolf, this deck is truly spectacular.

Serpentfire.ca

Spirit speak Tarot deck on The Numinous
The Spirit Speak Tarot

Spirit Speak Tarot Deck
If you’re into the more macabre, DIY, gothic look, the Spirit Speak tarot by Mary Bean Evans is right up your ally. With an alluring, sketchy quality, the illustrations for this deck resonate at their own slightly darker frequency – inviting you with a wink and a dripping dagger to step into that which is unknown. But feminist imagery, a clear love for the occult, and a really beautiful take on the Universe and the Cosmos also appears throughout.

So whether you pulling a bone hanging precariously atop a dagger to form a scale for “Justice” or a long-haired queen cradling a rune and her wand as “The Empress,” the Spirit Speak will quite literally…speak to your spirit. Let’s just say if the friendly monsters under your bed were into divination, they would have this deck on lock.

Spiritspeaktarot.com

TARYN TOOMEY: MOVE YOUR BODY TO HEAL YOUR SOUL

Taryn Toomey has built a cult following for her Shamanic-inspired workout, the class. She explains how it’s all been part of her own healing journey. Video and portrait: Jennifer Medina

taryn toomey shot by jennifer medina featured on the numinous

You have to have the courage to let it all go.

THE FEAR.

I have had a very long, sticky road these past few years. Hell, let’s call it like it is – the past 36 years. From the outside it could look all rosy but, like our lives on social media, there’s always something deeper, truer.

I grew up in a very complicated family (didn’t we all in some way?) but as a child, I absorbed a lot of those unsupportive patterns and continued to think: “it always has to be this way.” I called myself names, believed them, hated myself, was embarrassed to live in my body. I didn’t trust those around me; I questioned everything; it seemed like everyone was “out to get me.”

I didn’t want it to feel that way, but I was so fearful of letting it go, because it was what I knew.

These past few years have been about breaking that cycle. For my children, for the forward of my family, and, once and for all, for me. I decided that the history I lived doesn’t need to be part of the future I continue to create. It happened. Let’s move on. Right? I wish! It wasn’t that EASY.

Over the years I worked with psychologists, analysts, plant medicines, shamans, Eastern doctors, invested in good old fashioned friendships and more. But, in the end, I realized I didn’t need to talk about it anymore; I had TO MOVE IT. But I also had to keep it simple and do it BEAT BY BEAT.

And so came ‘the class.’ I knew I would need fire, heart and soul to get this story up and out of my DNA. I needed shaking, contraction, sound, release,intention, forgiveness and stillness. And music, to help me take it beat by beat, breath by breath.

In the world of fitness I have heard way too many things pushed into people’s psyches that are FEAR based, stemming from the “guru’s” own fears, ego, and the need to make others live in fear with them.

“Don’t do THIS it will bulk you, don’t do THAT you’ll ruin your body!”

But we aren’t all made the same, and these “theories” don’t apply to us as a whole.

How about…

Move how you NEED TO.
Move so you can FEEL GOOD.
Move to CREATE NEW SPACE for YOU TO LIVE IN.
Move to wake up, be alive, present, engaged, and to come UNSTUCK from the past.
Move to get out of the EGO – the one that makes you stare at yourself and size up every last centimeter of your body, gripping the mirror with your eyes, criticizing, loving and over dramatizing the things that don’t matter.

At the end of the day, if you don’t work on the parts of you that no one can see, you can change the shape of your body all you want, but living inside of it wont be pretty. It’s time to close your eyes and go INSIDE. The body you’re looking for is not out there. IT’S IN YOU.

Set’s move, people. Not in the “right” way, not in the “pretty” way, but in the way that you need to release the fear. Let’s gather the courage to let it all go. Moving this way is what’s saved my life, the future lives of my children, their children, and hopefully a whole lot of others.

When you move, summon the courage to let it all go. And take it beat, by beat, by beat…

ONWARD.

Follow the link to book and experience the class with Taryn Toomey for yourself.

Have you experienced healing working out? Connect with us and share on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter!

GET TO KNOW YOUR VIRGO MOON SIGN

With the Sun in Virgo it’s also the perfect time to shine a light on your Virgo moon sign, says Ash Baker. Image: Prince Lauder via Behance.net

Virgo Moon Sign image by Prince Lauder featured on The Numinous

If your Sun sign describes your vitality and speaks to the way you operate day-to-day, your Moon sign is your reactionary pulse. Her phases push and pull at us like the ocean’s tides. Your Moon represents how you vibe the most authentically in the world, without time to apply logical thought or judgement. If the Sun thinks about himself, and the Moon feels herself.

You can find out your Moon sign when you do your chart for free here. And do one for your friends’ while you’re there!

So now let’s discuss what what form the Virgo moon sign takes in its fullest expression.

Being proactive is the gold standard for this spirit. People with the Sun in Virgo tend to be very organized, but with a Virgo Moon sign, being able to control (to a reasonable degree) the external chaos is key to your health and wellbeing. If your internal desire to control a particular area of your life (that area all depends on which house your Virgo Moon sign falls in) is thwarted, you will literally feel as if your whole world is out of balance.

The Virgo Moon sign is a humble creature. She wants to be seen as skilled and gifted and has a strong, deeply rooted desire to help others. Virgo is the sign of the craftsman, so to have your Moon here means you have an emotional pull towards the kind of perfectionism that is built on day-by-day effort. I always picture the worker bee when I think of the Virgo Moon sign. With each passing day she is crafting something amazing that can be of service to the world, no matter how small that contribution may actually be. Goal-oriented repetition resulting in measurable success makes your soul sign.

Virgo is ruled by logic and analytical thought. Yet the Moon is all about feeling, so bridging the gap between the heart and mind is something the Virgo Moon sign will always be working on. They will want help the ones they love tackle their problems in a practical way. Remember, this Moon nurtures by helping others heal through logic.

Hyper aware of their own flaws, they sometimes project that critical tone onto others through a simple desire to help. This may not be the best approach, so remember that constantly critiquing yourself and the people around you isn’t exactly healthy. There is a time for discernment, and there is a time for pure acceptance.

The Virgo Moon sign feels their best around authentic people who accept their flaws, because underneath they are hugely self-critical too. Their Moon cracks the whip to keep improving daily. Not only are they a worker bee for others, but that drive gets reflected a la luna back onto themselves – the feeling that they must always be working on the best version of themselves.

This can make a Virgo Moon sign your own worst enemy. Use your natural gift of hyper-awareness to improve, but don’t let it run your life to the point of feeling stifled. Your Moon has very specific gifts to offer the world when you allow intuition to get a look in!

Some ideas to put into action to assist your Virgo Moon sign tendencies.

WRITE. Making lists is an easy way to feel like you’re in control of your life. That creeping fear you may forget something and, heaven forbid, look like you made a mistake will be put to rest. Your Moon can relax while still feeling on top of her game. Also, when feeling cranky just write it all out. Virgo is ruled by Mercury, the sign of communication, and is symbolized by our hands. So when emotions are overflowing, get out your pen and paper to purge what’s assailing your heart.

CREATE. Use your hands, and take a class in something that will require lots of skill. Your Moon will be put at ease by having a detailed task to perform. Your natural perfectionist tendencies will love to learn an instrument, or create photo-real pieces of art. Having a creative outlet that gives you the opportunity for others to praise you will also make your spirit sing. Cooking could be another option, because you get to work at it till it’s just right while also bringing happiness to others. Providing a delicious meal for the people you love is a win-win.

GET PHYSICAL. Virgo sign rules physical health and wellbeing, so your Moon needs to feel healthy to be happy. Whether it’s lifting weights, seeking zen through yoga or hiking out in nature, you will be more balanced once you some regular exercise to your routine. Speaking of routines, that need to control the chaos will also balanced by exercise. The Virgo Sun likes to think, the Virgo Moon wants to feel, and movement is super helpful to address this duality. Getting out of your head and into your body gives you the opportunity to just feel.

In summary, Virgo Moons make for great listeners, loyal friends and practical partners. Just keep the critical self-talk and need for control in check and all will be copacetic.

How have you learned to work with your Virgo Moon sign? Connect with us and share on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter!

AM I AN EMPATH? THE STORY OF HER

Have you ever asked the question “Am I an empath?” Lisa Barner shares an insight into what it means to be that girl…Images: Via Animhut.com

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This is the story of a girl-and the woman she’s embraced becoming.

In her earliest memories, with films to prove it, they shook their heads at her. They’d say “Where could she have possibly gotten that from?” She told stories of places she didn’t know and things beyond her scope of cognizance. It wasn’t just a child’s imagination nor a dose of adult television, she was an old soul they’d say. She spoke with conviction. Her eyes were bigger and more penetrating than most – they took you by surprise and held you there. They invited you in, made it so that you were fully seen and offered great love.

She was adamant about things that mattered to her-to which she held close. She was the one others confided in and looked to for advice and nurturing. Whether or not by her choosing she often became the rock – the steadfast, grounded, reliable one, on which others could visit for their own replenishment. They came because she witnessed them fully. She allowed them to be stripped of any masks or concerned with judgments – she provided space for them to be. She spoke to their souls, sometimes with words and other times simply by being present. She was their remedy.

Extremely sensitive in nature, often sporting her heart on her sleeve, she always gave without thinking twice. And only now, with the awareness of the strength it takes to do so-does she recognize how brave the gift of giving is. For now that she understands fully who she is, it is a choice she must carefully consider – for her own wellbeing.

 

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She’s a lightworker, an empath, earth angel and healer. She’s hyper sensitive to her surroundings – colors, textures, scents, physical conditions, energies. She feels emotions on a deeper level and a wider spectrum than most can relate to, and has given up trying to explain why or how she experiences this. She just knows its okay – no matter how trying some of the patterns are. It’s how she knows she’s not only alive but awakened 

She may not vividly remember choosing this course of life but when presented with it in gentle nudges, intuitive callings, serendipity and synchronicity, somewhere along the way she recommitted. She agrees to the purpose of her life, the value and power to influence this world for good. She embraces her gifts without fully knowing how they “work”.

She needs time alone. As a magnet for people’s physical energy, she literally can feel the worries, anxieties and concerns of others. She doesn’t always elect to hold them – especially not at the market, the gym, or at the end of her day. Nonetheless they find her. She has rituals to center herself. She sees nature as a sacred place and connects to the elements as a life source. She considers her word the clearest contract and expects that others treat is with the same sanctity. It is here she has been let down.

She knows of her divinity. She finds way to practice and celebrate it within or without traditional religious sanctions. She is always aware of its presence around and through her. You’ve heard it too- that you were created in the image and likeness of God, or the Divine. But that kind of duality of being, the power of an omnipresent force and the eradication of fear and limitations, isn’t for everyone. She though knows, deeply within, that she is infinite. She is brave enough to hand over her struggles, to surrender her doubts and to trust blindly the truth to unfold before her.

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She struggles with the human stuff. She has trouble connecting to money, to sitting under florescent lighting in a cubicle. She doesn’t date well either because she sees love so differently. Though like others she desires connectedness and intimacy, she knows rather that she IS LOVE. That only a partner who is willing to meet her on all these levels can be a true match. She is patient because she has much else to keep her days busy and her heart beating with joy.

She struggles to remain relatable to her peers and her family – conscious of how different she feels yet how deeply she yearns for their acceptance. There may be times she disconnects from her spiritual self in order to appear“normal” – but in those times she is lost to herself. She retreats and is sad, knowing her authenticity is being compromised. She isn’t of much use to anyone in that place. Only when she reawakens to her reality can she thrive. She bravely chooses her higher self.

When she is with her tribe she can rest.They know what she’s carrying and silently give her permission. Their eyes are the same safe place. There she dances and plays, creates and sings from the depths of her soul. She laughs wholeheartedly from her toes up. She is protected with them, she is wiser because of their influence and deepened in her own knowing. She can stand in her power unapologetically. It is with them she is home. She is them and they are she.

A wide eyed dreamer, brave believer.

I am her.

Do you recognise yourself in this story? Connect with the Numi tribe on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter, and share how you bring your light to the world

Find out more about Lisa Barner and her work at Souspeaklife.com

BRAINWASHED: IS LANDMARK A CULT?

When I did the Landmark Forum, I was following in the footsteps of the most badass people I know – and I learned some invaluable life lessons. So why did I find myself asking; ‘is Landmark a cult?’ By Ruby Warrington. Images: Alex Prager for Garage Magazine.

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Half way into day three at the Landmark Forum, I was ready to run for the hills. Along with 150 or so other people, from every walk of life, I had been cooped-up in a windowless basement in midtown Manhattan for almost 13 hours a day straight, whilst being told that everything I knew about myself, about my beliefs, and about the world, was an illusion. An illusion created by my “always listening” mind (Landmark speak for the ego) to avoid taking full responsibility for my life.

The course leader was busy psyching the crowd up for the “big reveal” – the key teaching of the Forum that would come later that day, embracing which, we’d been promised, would lead to a life of “infinite possibilities”. So long as we “enrolled” everybody else we knew into the Landmark conversation too (at $600 a pop), and then committed to an on going ($900+) study of their “curriculum for life”.

All around me, people had already been having life-changing epiphanies as they’d worked the course – coming out from behind their “rackets” (“fixed ways of being that result in persistent complaints”) and calling friends and family members they had been “pretending” things were cool with to “cough up the fur-ball” of their most shaming truths (‘Mom, I never come visit because actually it felt like you never really loved me’).

Encouraged to publically share their breakthroughs, there had been tears, and there had been cheers. And here I was, feeling an almost physical repulsion to the teachings. Earlier, we’d been asked to identify our “strong suits” – coping mechanisms we’d adopted at key points of trauma in our lives, which had become “ways of acting and being you rely on to produce results and make it in life.” Which, obviously, had to go, along with all the other “stories” you told yourself about…yourself.

I’d identified one of my strong suits as what I always considered a healthy degree of scepticism, or discernment. It’s what made me a good editor. But now it felt like a straight jacket. I’d paid my money and I wanted a breakthrough too! But all I could think, as I took in the scenes around me, was; “OMG this is actual brainwashing in action. Why did nobody warn me Landmark is…a cult?!”

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The “c-word” hit the headlines last week, in the aftermath of the HBO documentary Going Clear – an inside expose on the Church of Scientology. And watching the opening scenes, in which they described the Church’s central process of “auditing” members in order to process their limiting beliefs, I was taken right back to that basement room in the Landmark HQ.

Was Landmark Scientology lite?

The dictionary definition of “brainwashing” is; “to make (someone) adopt radically different beliefs by using systematic and often forcible pressure”. True, nobody forced me to do the Landmark Forum – I actually decided to sign up because I knew so many amazing, go-getting, and seemingly highly-evolved individuals who’d done it, and I basically wanted a piece.

But the constant pressure throughout the course to “enrol” our friends, co-workers, and family members definitely crossed over into coercion territory in my book – echoing the way Scientologists are asked to “disconnect” from any people in their life who don’t adopt the teachings of the church. It’s also the kind of behaviour that gets organisations labelled “cult”, opposed to simply “community” or “club”.

The fact that during Landmark I was also confined to that one windowless room for three consecutive 13-hour days, with minimal breaks for food, and asked not to take notes or go to the toilet (this used to be enforced rigidly, but nobody actually stopped me when I did sneak out for a restroom break), also felt a lot like “systematic” pressure to adopt their teachings.

Then there was the bizarre lingo and double-talk they used to scramble my synapses and “re-program” my thinking. Overall, by the time I left, my scepticism very much intact, it felt simultaneously like a narrow escape…and like there must be something really, really wrong with me.

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Watching Going Clear (named for the ultimate goal in Scientology – a mind that’s completely “clear”, or washed, of negative beliefs), the phrase that kept returning to me was; “the Emperor’s New Clothes.”

You know the story right? About the sneaky tailor who convinces the Emperor his “invisible” new suit is actually made of the finest cloth. In fear of questioning their leader’s beliefs, the Emperor’s subjects go along with it – complementing him on his beautiful new clothes, despite the fact they can see for themselves he’s naked.

And this desire to conform is something I felt they played on at Landmark, too. Deeply rooted in our most basic psychology, human beings are pack animals after all. Positioning yourself as the outsider is also something akin to suicide on a primal level. In ancient times, distancing yourself from the tribe was a sure-fire way to get killed by predators, or die from lack of food and warmth. Going along with what’s being indoctrinated therefore is not only preferable, it’s the only truly “safe” option.

Did that explain why everybody around me was whooping and cheering when the “big reveal” finally occurred…while it seemed to me like the biggest “racket” on the planet?

Coming out of Landmark, I immediately wanted to speak to the switched-on women I knew who’d done it too. I was desperate to know if they’d felt the same as me – or if I was, in fact, a hopelessly repressed freak-a-zoid, too scared of facing my own demons to even acknowledge their existence. The overarching response I got was that yes, it was a huge shame that there was so much cult-like emphasis on “enrolment”, and the accompanying financial hard sell. Because the teachings in and of themselves were awesome…right?

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And here comes the really interesting part. Seven months on, I can see that they were absolutely right – and that the Landmark Forum was one of the most pivotal experiences on my inner journey to date.

We are all slaves to our monkey minds; we do self-sabotage with the stories we choose to believe about ourselves; and we do have to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, to “look bad”, and to see beyond the illusion of reality, in order to evolve into the highest expression of ourselves. It is in this place of ultimately authentic self-expression that a life of infinite possibility lies.

Behind all the crazy linguistics and mental manipulation, these are the central teachings of Landmark (and of Scientology, from what I’ve read, not to mention Buddhist philosophy!). With hindsight, I can see how having them strong-armed into my psyche over that one mind-bending weekend last September forced me, on some deep level, to accept and work with limiting parts of myself I used to believe were unassailable.

I’ve since had the kind of searingly honest conversations with my mother that have taken our relationship to a whole other level. I no longer blindly accept what my belief system tells me, and look instead to the cold, hard facts of life.

And if I railed against actually calling any people in my life to “get complete” during my Landmark weekend (I had a lengthy email exchange with my mom, and called a friend to confess a very innocuous white lie), I have since embraced the concept of not sugar-coating stuff for fear of upsetting people, or getting a bad reaction – and seen massive benefits. All common sense stuff, actually, “but delivered in an environment of startling intensity,” as another journalist wrote about Landmark.

As for the “big reveal”? You’ll have to do the Forum and find out what it is for yourself. And if that means I’m now “enrolling” you – well, there must be some chinks in my sceptical strong suit after all.

Have you done the Landmark Forum? What did you get out of it? Connect and share your stories on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

To find out more about the Landmark Forum and their courses visit Landmarkworldwide.com

HOLY C**P! How I achieved the perfect poop

Don’t get grossed out! The perfect poop (PP) is a sign that mind and body are working in perfect harmony. Ayurvedic practitioner Wolf Medicine says finding hers meant leaving New York City…

Image: Oh...by Edward Edwards via Behance.net
Image: Oh…by Edward Edwards via Behance.net

Forgive the crude title, but the Ayurvedic practitioner in me can’t help but get real about bowel movements. After all, a good gut is the key to good health and lately I’ve become obsessed with poop because I know it’s about more than just taking a dump. When shit ‘ain’t right down there, it’s a sign that shit ‘ain’t right in the mind – and in the name of addressing both, I find myself on a quest to figure some stuff out in my life.

Essentially, my ultimate goal in Ayurveda school was to experience the Perfect Poop (PP) – which is what all the doctors and practitioners who taught me actually referred to it as. The PP occurs first thing in the morning upon waking. A friend of mine says the urge to poop is what wakes her up in the morning. It should be shaped like a banana or a coiled up snake (yes this is truly possible), and yellowish brown in color.

If you aren’t gagging or disgusted by now, congrats! You are an emotionally mature person. If this is grossing you out then you’d better read on, because once you realize how important it is to have the PP daily, you will be looking in that toilet and jumping up and down with glee and admiration when it finally does occur.

For me, achieving the PP is epic, a sign that I am truly taking care of my body. The thing is, it only ever happens when I leave New York (my home) for vacation, or if I take a day or two off work. Seriously, I once went to visit my mom in Texas and was pooping perfect poops for days. And recently, after being constipated for three days, I had a morning off and experienced a moment of PP glory that brought such a sense of calm and happiness I almost took a picture to show to my friends.

I had been eating Ayurvedic meals of root veggies, ghee, Kitchari, and all that good stuff, and drinking warm water in the morning and Triphala tea at night for several days in addition to taking ‘moments of silence’ (my phrase for meditation) each morning. Then, it happened: not just a nice, long, snake-like poo in the toilet, but proof that my body was responding to my good intentions. A sign that mind and body were working in perfect harmony!

Getting all the waste out of the body, not only physical but mental waste as well, is how we stay healthy. Put good food and thoughts in, and the kidneys, liver and colon will get the ‘bad’ stuff out. What happens if it stays in? Well, cancer for one thing. And migraines. And skin rashes and acne and a host of other ailments and diseases. If the crap isn’t coming out via the rectum, then it’s coming out in the skin, or festering in the colon, liver or blood, or wherever else the body decides to store it. Then it gets rotten and toxic, and then you got problems.

Which brings me to 2009. Back then I was in my late twenties and drank one to two bottles of wine a day. After months of my skin breaking out in either acne or eczema, I decided to change my ways for good. I didn’t really pay attention to poop then. I knew constipation was bad because I’d read it somewhere and that was about it. I was pretty regular but relied heavily on coffee to help me ‘go,’ which, I later learned, was also contributing to all the skin issues.

Image: Headcase Designs
Image: Headcase Designs

So I quit drinking coffee and alcohol (and ‘til this day I feel like if I can accomplish both those things, then I can do anything in this lifetime. ANYTHING). I cut out gluten, and later, much later, processed sugar (another REALLY difficult journey that’s a whole different conversation).

I also started reading about Ayurveda, and even went to an Ayurvedic doctor who put me on a diet of no onions, garlic, tomatoes, shell fish, cashews, peanuts, yogurt, fermented food, coffee or alcohol, along with having me take a bunch of Indian herbs and immune boosting vitamins. Meat was also off the menu, but I decided I needed at least one thing in my life that I could still enjoy. Was this hard for me to stick to? Hell no! I actually found I thrive off this kind of shit.

I love a challenge, and I’m so vain that if it keeps my skin clear, I will do it. For the next eight or so months I pretty much stayed away from partying and instead ate really well and read books at home. I actually don’t remember if I was having regular bowel movements at that time but I assume my digestion was better.

The bad news is, I was still getting eczema outbreaks every so often despite my saint-like diet. About two years into my new Ayurvedic life, a friend suggested I try meditation. I felt my body stiffen and my mind shut down (but not in the good, meditative way) as soon as she suggested it. Sit still? Not think? Quitting coffee is one thing…but for somebody whose made restlessness an art form, that shit is impossible.

You think checking your Facebook or Instagram non-stop in a problem? Well I laugh, ‘cause that is child’s play people. Try not committing to ANYTHING, ever, as your life’s work. Routine, consistency, commitment, stillness…all of it is like kryptonite to me. I’m amazed I’m still with my current girlfriend (it’s been nine months which is like nine years for me).

I have yet to join a club, organization or class, and stick with it for more than a month. I have also managed to avoid a permanent place of employment throughout my twenties and into my mid-thirties. The list of careers I have either attempted so far include, but are not limited to: joining the peace corps, working on a boat, becoming an ordained minister, being a massage therapist, homeopath, acupuncturist, psychiatrist, naturopath, bike mechanic, addiction counselor, hermit, herb farmer, stripper, dominatrix, queer porn actor, houseboy, dancer, choreographer, yoga teacher (that is still something I’m looking into) and many more.

I’ve also made several attempts at figuring out how to make a living hanging out in the desert or the beaches of Hawaii and Australia (I’m actually still looking into those). All of this is to say my passions and interests vary, and rarely stick. So if I can’t even choose a life path then how in the hell am I going to meditate even three minutes a day (my goal each morning when I wake up)?

People often blame New York, saying it breeds this sort of behavior in folks. I hear over and over that there is so much variety here – so many paths to choose – that people take on too much. I’ve come to believe it isn’t New York that makes people this way – rather, it’s a mecca for people who already have this monkey-mind-I-love-to-be-busy-and-do-as-much-as-possible quality in them. New York is where busy people come to get off on being busy.

How does this relate back to the PP? My digestion got really fucked up when I lost a long-term freelance job, around the same time my friend suggested mediation to me. And what I’ve learned about pooping, or lack thereof, is that if your mind isn’t settled, calm and in harmony with your body, then the rest of your body will not function properly.

This is an illustration of the direct link between mind and body. If your mind is scattered and frantic, then your digestion will be scattered and frantic and too – thus, constipation (and lots of other symptoms that come under the umbrella term IBS).
In Ayurveda this is called a ‘vata’ imbalance. Vata is ether and air. It is a quality within each of us that is light, cold, rough, dry and constantly moving. It is located in the mind and pelvis. You can’t always see ether and air but they are there.

So how to address this imbalance? I have learned to find a calm, grounded place for my mind through meditation and yoga. For me, sticking to routine as much as possible also helps. Any divergent from my morning or evening routine means no PP for me. I seriously need two hours each morning of quiet time – no talking, no rushing to get ready, no looking at lots of crap on the internet – in order to properly evacuate my bowels.

My girlfriend and I recently made an agreement to block Facebook from our lives and to have silence in the morning to either sip warm water or do pranayama, and that has helped a lot. When I still get eczema every now and then, I know the feedback my body is giving me is that a time of retreat will do me some good – in addition to upping my dosage of probiotics and blood cleansing herbs.

As for finally settling on a career as an Ayurvedic practitioner? Using the practice to heal myself and my poop has shown me that it’s my dharma to share Ayurveda with others. Oh wait. Or is my path simply to become a yogi, practicing svadhyaya in the mountains of northern India? For now I commit to listen to my body and follow its guidance.

Have you found a way to do the PP too? We’re all yogis here, so come share your stories on Twitter, Instagram (maybe not your photos tho) and Facebook

Find out more about Wolf Medicine here.

MY MYSTICAL WEEK: GET YOUR FREE NUMEROLOGY CHART

Move over astrology, I’ve got a favorite new tool / toy for personal development thanks to Numerologically.com – the site where you can get your free numerology chart today. Images: Traugott Collection by Fluttuo.

'TRAUGOTT COLLECTION' BY FLUTTUO as numerology found on Thenuminous.net

It’s a little known fact that before Agyness Deyn became “Agyness, Supermodel” (and now Agyness, Actress, with two indie flicks under her belt and two Hollywood blockbusters in post-production), she was l’il old Laura Hollins. But luckily for our Aggie her mom was well-versed in the wisdom of numerology, and when it was suggested that a more noticeable name might be a good idea, she helped her daughter come up with something that would have a cosmic impact on her catwalk career.

Becoming Agyness meant going from an intellectually focussed Seven Expression Number, to a smiling, adventurous Three – aligning her outward expression with her sociable Three Life Path Number. Just perfect for a girl with her sights on charming the entire fashion industry and becoming the fun-loving face of her generation!

I knew about the name change but since a dude called Victor Temprano reached out last week to tell me about the free numerology chart calculator he’s just launched, I know know the details. And yes, I’ve been having all sorts of fun plugging in my names (I was born Ruby Shepheard) and birth deets, as well as those of my family, friends, and quite a few celebrities I have met or interviewed over the years.

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Because you can begin to see how numerology is an intriguing tool to play with. Unlike astrology, where your chart is decided the minute you’re born and written like a cosmic blueprint in the stars, your numerology chart, when it comes to the numbers in your name at least, can go through many twists and turns.

Why do some people choose to change their name by deed pole? Why are some women adamant about keeping their maiden name when they get married? And what would going double-barrelled do for your numbers?

What’s interesting in my case, is that adopting my husband’s surname has meant my Life Path Number (a bit like your Sun sign in astrology) stayed an Eight. But the Four Heart’s Desire Number I was born with, the Four that craved stability and reliability, became a Nine once I found this in my marriage, making me more generous with my own time when it comes to helping others.

Ugh, endless numerological ribbit holes and HOURS-OF-F-U-N. So yes, dear Numis, you might want to clear your diary and check Numerologically.com.

What did you find in your numbers? Connect with us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook to share.

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BE THE DARK: HOW TO EMBRACE YOUR SHADOW SIDE

We are bombarded with messages urging us to “be the light” – but what if true healing means embracing the darkest aspects of ourselves, asks Emily Tepper. Images: Andrew Robinson via Behance.net

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Be the dark. Walk boldly through the unknown reaches of the soul.

This year, I am embracing my inner “dark worker,” because I’ve come to realize that actually our dark side is the most creative place to be. It is in the fertile void, in the dark, underground, where the seed germinates.

There are aspects of our creativity, our courage, and our power which, like a seed, can only incubate in total darkness. This is why my darkness has become my favorite place to be.

I have spent so much of my life trying to improve my dark moods, to lighten the dark humor that might provoke or offend the polite, and soften the sharp opinions that are often hard to hear and accept – even when getting right with them can be the most crucial step to getting out of denial. It’s meant denying the darkness in me that also translates as a low tolerance for bullshit, a quick temper, sudden rage, and profound grief.

It’s ironic though, that since I decided to accept my darkness, my moods have improved considerably. Like it was the constant pressure to “be the light,” the constant cultural shaming of the dark, that was half the issue. The dark is immensely powerful, and yet we are afraid of it.

But think about where the dark exists in our language: pure creativity “rises up,” from “the underground.” The answers to our most profound existential crises often lie buried in our “sub” conscious.

But the dark is where shame is lifted and new truths are actualized – as seen and witnessed only by those who are also willing to stray far enough from the safety of the will lit path to witness.

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Every fairy tale Princess walks a dark night in the forest on her way to healing and reclaiming her majesty. To grow, she is made to face the utter fear of the wild and unknown. In the dark, and usually alone, it is through this journey that we find ourselves.

We’ve all heard stories of the Dark Night of The Soul, and how powerful it is to pass through it to the other side. We go on to heal others in our ascension to the light, but we become who we are in the dark.

So now consider this: maybe “black magic” isn’t evil at all, but actually where the alchemy happens. Perhaps there is a tremendous, almost disgusting, amount of power available to those who are willing to go there. Maybe that’s what makes the practitioners of the “dark arts” so frightening to the rest of us.

And before you villainize the villain, consider that in some countries it is dark for most of the day, most of the year even. What if your natural state of being is more Norway than Florida? My moods are like the weather of Siberia – cold and dark, with occasional bursts of incredible, irrepressible light. And I’ve decided I’m good with this version of myself. She doesn’t need improvement.

Our emotions are like a weather system. They are shifting constantly, and the seasons of the soul they represent are the very essence of change and manifestation.

If the spiritual “industry” is full of Light Workers – this year I am declaring myself a Dark Worker. And I urge you again to Be The Dark.

How will you honor your dark side in 2015? Connect with us and share your story on Twitter or Facebook.

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DO “THE WORK,” HAVE YOUR BEST YEAR EVER

Real spiritual “work” = practise + action – and 2014 was the year I finally signed up, says Ruby Warrington.

Numinous founder Ruby Warrington shot by Thomas Giddings for TheNuminous.net
Portrait: Thomas Giddings

“Doing the work”. It’s a phrase that gets thrown around a lot in holistic / alternative wellness circles – but what does it actually mean? Is it like the time I went for acupuncture and was given “homework” to do – little sticky packs of Mugwort, called “Moxa”, to affix to my liver meridian and set light to like incense each night? Fair enough, I had been drinking quite a lot to avoid dealing with a stressful work situation, but wasn’t the state of my liver my practitioner’s to deal with?

Apparently not. If I’ve come to understand anything about how real healing, both physical and metaphysical, works in the past year, it’s this: ultimate wellbeing – just like ultimate abundance, ultimate freedom, and, ultimately I guess, ultimate bliss – is a collaborative effort between myself, whichever practise I happen to be working with at the time, and the all-loving, all-knowing Universe itself.

Looking back over the past twelve months, I can honestly say I’ve had one of the best years of my life. And not because everything just “worked out”, or opportunities fell from the sky like globules of golden bird poop. But in terms of my personal evolution, I feel like I’ve busted through blocks (to borrow just a little self-help speak) I wasn’t even aware were holding me back. Well maybe I was aware…but there’s NO WAY I was going to admit it and deal – not in this lifetime at least.

But deciding to face my demons, be my own knight in shining armour and slay the freakin’ dragon once and for all, looking ahead to 2015 I feel simultaneously like I’ve aged a decade and like I’m ten years younger. And it has not been easy. There have been tears, and there has been anguish. There has been much meditating, much journaling, and much reading of books with “Conversations” and “God” in the title.

But above all, there has been a very conscious decision on my part to actually “do the work”.

When I used to hear that phrase, I’d think it was referring to some kind of mystical alchemy that went on inside the body if you did enough yoga, took enough gong baths, or had enough therapy. As if the divine oneness was watching on, and would do some divine laying on of hands to absolve all your issues once you’d reached a certain quota of zen / worthiness.

2014, which shall forever more be referred to as “the year that changed EVERYTHING”, showed me that it’s actually way more prosaic than that. You want to change something? Move forward in your personal development? Bring about the internal “shift” that’s gonna raise your vibration to attract all the abundance you just know is out there waiting for you into you life? Then babe, the buzzword here is action.

For example, it’s one thing to accept that perhaps your cash flow issues are more to do with your attitude to money than the fact accounts clerks get off on withholding checks owed to you – and a whole other deal to weep buckets in a Family Constellations Therapy session as you see how it’s actually intrinsically linked to your Grandmother dying young, and your own mother not really knowing how to give you love as a result.

But the real work? That happens when you then do the Landmark Forum, and realize you actually have to call your mom and tell her it’s never really been okay that she loved your brother more than you, because she’d basically learned how by the time he came along. And then you actually do call her, and there are buckets more tears, but you end the conversation by telling each other how you feel like mother and daughter for the first time you can remember.

Phew! That’s what I call work. And it’s also where the “mystical alchemy” part comes in, because you know what? I’m facing down 2015 in a better financial position than ever. “Money” equates to “mother” in Jungian therapy after all.

And if dealing with my lack mentality was what I decided I wanted to work on in 2014, once the floodgates had opened it turns out it was time to tackle all the other niggling issues I began to realize were all a part of the jigsaw puzzle. Those feelings of lack…well weren’t they also contributing to my inability to share (the load, my visions, my real feelings)? This was another Landmark revelation – the full story / trauma of which I’ll share (now I’m getting better at it) in a later post.

One of my favorite things of all has been learning to work with my intuition this year – you know, actually act on my gut feelings about things, even if this often means taking the scarier, hairier route. If I started to meditate because I thought it would help me get more clarity and focus, little did I know the work my practise was prepping me for was the ability to first notice my truth, and then go stand in it, no matter how many people it might piss off.

And by meditation, I don’t just mean the ten minutes I manage on a good morning. By bringing the practise of being able to step back from my thoughts to everything I do – a hard core workout, a complicated writing assignment, my super intense / difficult / transformational experience at Burning Man, and, yes, my relationship with my mother, has been some of the most important work of all.

I actually predict that “work” and “money” are going to be big themes for us all in the coming months. In numerology, 2015 is a universal “8” year (you add 2+1+5), which is the number of challenges, personal power, and hard-earned reward for your efforts. In other words, do the work this year and the compensation could be bigger than ever. So here’s how…

First up, you need to define what you want to work on. And I say, go big. No shying away from that “thing”, it’s time to drag the monkey off your back, look it right in the eye and declare: GAME ON. (Oh but clue – the real monkey might not be what you think. Like my money issues turned out to be mother issues, the fact you have a hard time holding onto a relationship is, undoubtedly, all about your DAD).

Now just start looking around for the “way in”. Besides the Family Constellations work and the Landmark (which is pretty hard core, FYI), last year I also tried acupuncture, breathwork meditation, had regular visits with a shaman, hit the mat at The Class with Taryn Toomey, and worshiped at the church of IntenSati. Not to mention that transformational trip to Burning Man. Each and every one of which provided an insight, a tool, or a doorway for me to see into.

WALK. THROUGH. THE. DOOR. Don’t just stand there looking at the portal of opportunity any one of your practises has opened for you. Where the rubber meets the road, is where you choose to take action. It’s one thing to get an intense download about your relationship with your father after a particularly crazy Kundalini kriya, and a whole other ball game when you then send him an email laying out all the deets (yes, this also happened to me last year).

Don’t be shy. As in, don’t shy away from taking the necessary action. And if you’re having trouble working out what that is, it’s probably the thing you least want to do. But you know you have to. In fact, if it makes you cry just thinking about it, that’s probably it. Tears – of emotion, of compassion, of release – are often how you know the work is working.

Finally, you’d better embrace feeling a little bit weird, while all this is going on. Our brilliant Tarotscopestress Louise Androlia (aka Louniverse) is also a holistic life coach, and one of her favorite things is to remind her clients it’s actually normal to feel abnormal when your life is transforming, inside and out. So expect to doubt yourself, expect to feel vulnerable, expect to question your sanity sometimes – just don’t expect it to be a breeze, is what I think she means. After all, if it was meant to be easy, it wouldn’t get called The Work in the first place. But it’s worth it.

YOGI VEGAN LEZ: ZEN AND THE ART OF CELIBATE DATING

When Alexandra Roxo signed up for a peyote medicine ceremony, she forgot to tell her girlfriend this would mean a week of celibate dating. Uh-oh…Homepage image: Fab Ciracolo 

Alexandra Roxo tries to negotiate a period of celibacy before her peyote ceremony. Click to read more!
Stuck between a rock and…a psychedelic cactus?

The night before my last peyote medicine ceremony, I was almost asleep when my girlfriend climbed on top of me and started a slow dry hump. I was jarred awake, shocked, and didn’t know what to do. No, not because she’s hideous or I’m no longer attracted to her or dry humping is gross. Not any of those reasons. But because I wasn’t supposed to be sexual / have sex for three days before my medicine ceremony! This essentially meant a week of celibate dating.

So I was faced with a dilemma. A) We’d been having a rough time and hadn’t had sex all week. B) I didn’t tell her I was supposed to be celibate for three days prior to taking the peyote and three days after. Woops. And C) Well shit, C is that I love her and she’s hot.

I found myself between a rock (or rather, a cactus) and a hard place. Also between 300-thread count cotton sheets and a hot bod. So I somehow justified that I’d let her masturbate on me or with me and it wouldn’t count. Not exactly rational but it was the best I could come up with. She finished quickly, I didn’t let her touch me, and somehow I felt no guilt about it all. Until. The next night.

I’d had two peyote ceremonies with the same medicine man before, which were both “deer ceremonies” in the Apache tradition, one in a teepee upstate and one in Mexico. Both times it was incredibly enlightening. I’d worked through deep parental issues that were a part of my Saturn return, and sung in the dark wearing a white muumuu as I released the pain of my youth.

Alexandra Roxo at a peyote medicine ceremony tipi . Click to read more!
Alexandra and her soul sister Natalia Leite at her first deer medicine ceremony

But this ceremony was different, in that I got a real ass kicking. I felt like I was gonna puke but couldn’t. I felt like I was having the worst period cramps in my life. I couldn’t lay down. And I kept seeing dark visions. Had my soul become a dark vault in the last few months? OR WAS IT THE SEX? (I mean, half sex really, but…)

Worse, after the ceremony the ass kicking continued for a full week. My GF and I’s relationship was pulled apart and rebuilt, like three times. Meaning I was crying in public again. At one point Orian and I were sitting on a bench in the park and I was crying and she put her hands over her head and commented that her shadow looked like a deer.

At that moment I got it. Everything came together. She was in on this ass kicking from the Universe too! She didn’t even know I had done the deer medicine but the plant had obviously used her lovely spirit and they’d been in cahoots all week to school and teach me.

This interconnectedness of my lessons has revealed itself again and again over the years, sometimes in a calm and magical/twinkly way, and other times in a more grotesque and “punch in the face” way. It still amazes me. This time, I’ve come to realize that managing sexual energy in times of spiritual growth can be very, very challenging.

Essentially, when I’m deep in some growth and lessons, the LAST thing on the planet I want is to open my physical body to some “poking.” To put it crudely. ‘Cause when I’m not in the sex zone, that’s kind of what it feels like. Like an intrusive visitor showing up at the very wrong time.

When I want to hold my energy close and exist in my higher chakras, I’m thinking about my angelic spirit guides and the work I’m doing here. And sex? Well, sex feels incredibly mundane. But how is this fair to your partner? And how do we navigate these moments as a couple?

I’ve also started meditating every night before bed recently. You know, releasing my day by doing visualizations and setting my dream time intentions. And lemme tell you…this can be a major buzzkill in the bedroom. The other night my girlfriend and I were kissing on the couch and when we moved into the bedroom I stopped the fun and was like: “Wait, just let me meditate real quick!” When I opened my eyes 15-20 minutes later and looked over, she was passed out and snoring with her mouth open. Dammit.

On the other hand, I find myself trying to turn the work I’m doing into “our” work. The other night, instead of meditating, I asked her participate with me as we shouted what we are grateful for. “Thank you Universe for coffee! Sunshine! An HBO Go password from a friend!” And then I guided us through some vibrational chanting.

I know this is sounding like a Christian teen sleepover or a day at a Waldorf school, but it was great. But we don’t live alone, so there’s that. Instead of that awkward moment in the kitchen, “Shit, did our roommate hear me cumming?” it’s “Did he hear us… doing vibrational chanting work and daily gratitudes??”

Alexandra Roxo doing yoga looking in the fridge. Click here to read why!
“Did our room mate hear us chanting before bed?”

Thankfully, taking the leap into the land of heart-warming cheesiness can be just as bonding as sex. Sometimes we tackle the bigger questions in relationships like cheating, differences in values, or whether or not we want kids.

But the small ones can be the scariest to tackle. Like telling your partner you aren’t really feeling sexual, and them being able to respect that space and not feel threatened/slighted/or like you think they’re ugly now. Being able to say; “Hi. I’m wanting to not have sex for a bit ’cause I’m tryna connect with my guides and my third eye this week.” Or “Hey I can’t have sex cause I’m cleansing/grounding my energy before a ceremony.”

And them being able to accept where you’re at, and not go parading around in Agent Provocateur panties or send you nude selfies of them masturbating or watch porn beside you at high volumes while you’re trying to meditate.

If your partner is down to respect and accept where you’re at, then maybe during this time they can do something useful with their energy too, like work on their kickboxing moves or reorganize the fridge. And then when you’ve ridden out that wave and got what you need, you can come back together roaring and ready to meld energies, have sex all night and transcend together with some candles, wine and Kenny G.

@yoga_vegan_lez

TAROTSCOPES: AUGUST 2014

Cast by Louise Androlia using The Cosmic Tarot Deck

I love to chat with you about your ‘scopes and how your month is going, so find me on Twitter and Instagram @louniverse and at Facebook/louiseandrolia

Leo / Leo Rising – The Ten of Pentacles

Happy Birthday, sweet beast! So you’re about ready for a switch up. Something’s got to give, something’s got to go and you need to reshuffle yourself back into your home zone – it’s time to step it up. What does that mean to you? I’m talking about upping your game. Is there a wobble of anxiety or a fear of failure that comes with that idea, to go bigger, to be greater, to feel better? I want you to approach your nerves this month with a shift in perspective, and turn that wobble into a wave of excitement – an unapologetic urge to keep seeking what lights you up and ways to brighten your experience.

For those of you feeling stuck somewhere that you don’t want to be, then now is the time to believe in change and know that you are allowed to pull things apart and put them back together again. In fact, your inner soul is calling out for you to do exactly this. You aren’t here on this planet to be hiding from the things you feel the urge to dream up and pursue.

It’s human nature to find a comfortable seat in an uncomfortable space – and you know what that looks like, right? But when I talk about upping your game, it’s about stepping out of your comfort zone, knowing there is something more for you to reach for. So the message this month is simple – it’s time to honor that emotion. Change is good, and it’s even better when you bring it in yourself.

If you’ve been struggling against the tide and are feeling a little on the edge of a victim mentality, it’s okay. We all quite frequently want to wave our hands in the air and go, ‘wait ARE YOU SERIOUS?!’ So over the next few weeks, just check in with yourself, all the time. Maybe you’ll see where it feels like you’re erring slightly off course – and be able to ask yourself, have you been stopped in your tracks on purpose? Perhaps this is your chance to carve out a new space for yourself, a better space.

Finally, the art of sharing is important this month. Your story is what makes you unique, so yes, keep something for yourself. But also recognize that you might experience the most healing when you allow yourself to be vulnerable to the influence of others. Writing will be on your side too, so get up every day and journal, or ‘brain vomit’ as I like to call it! Let your subconscious spill onto the pages. You might just find the answers you’ve been looking for.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Virgo / Virgo Rising – The Two of Wands

Hey traveller. You really have been all over the place recently, physically and emotionally, quite the adventurer. You kind of get a kick out of it but there is definitely an inner yearning for some boring old peace and quite now! I can’t promise that, but I can remind you how to check in on your journey and how to thrive while moving at super speed.

Even when you’re up to your eyeballs with work and general overload it’s important to find a way to carve out a space to breathe. And yes, conscious breathing itself is an awesome practice, but when I say breathe I really mean just make some space for nothingness. Like full on nada, zilch, nothing at all. Lying on your carpet staring at the ceiling. You want to always have a corner of your internal white board sparkling clean and free. Why? Because otherwise how are you ever going to see your way out of a problem or expand yourself to your next power zone!

So yeah, let’s take a look at what you’re manifesting – that old trick, what does the word even mean to you? I feel it gets thrown around a little too casually these days, and we can harness it much more elegantly I think. You are filled with ideas, I know you are, so think what the patch of land you are building on looks like at the moment. Groundwork means literally securing a safe and impassioned space to build something from, so do a quick rec and check your balance. Are your actions fully aligned with your highest truth and best intentions? Which idea feels the best to you? Which idea holds the least amount of fear and ego driven ‘what ifs’?

It feels to me like you are about to shift into a new perspective around a career and passion project or situation. You may be letting something go (woo hoo) or feeling your way around a familiar scene and wondering how to pep it up. Try not to be too frantic for change; there is a sense of easing your way in that will help you over the coming weeks. Avoid panicking and remember to be grateful for having got yourself to this place. You are exactly where you should be, so stand proud and tall and just take one step.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Libra / Libra Rising – Five of Cups

Did you feel some changes or shifts last month? That Judgement card is such a calling to rise up that it can often bring in a wobble via the Universe, with the intent of shooting you off in a new direction. Unfortunately when that happens we often have no idea why we’ve been shoved over. You want to get up and march on, full of empowerment, but aren’t quite sure what the purpose of it all is.

So this month I want you to try and see where you feel like you’ve been let down or knocked about a bit. Is there a point right now, perhaps in a shift in career or relationship focus, where you feel a bit like ‘um, well what was the point of that?’ It’s easy to feel that life has tipped you up and wonder where the hope is.

But I want you to not feel like you’ve taken any steps backwards, or are slipping back into a role from the past you didn’t really like. Each day is always a new start, and the past is never a blueprint for your future. Feelings of loss and disappointment are supposed to feel uneasy, so make sure that if you are feeling a wobble that you sit down and feel those feelings. Or write it out to get out your anxieties out of your mind and body – you don’t need to be pacing round having debates with your own ego mind, so speak, shout, announce your fears, and they won’t seem nearly so overpowering.

Then it’s time to have a think about what the redirection might be. Usually when we feel a bit lost, it’s because a pause in energy is offering us a moment to recalibrate. In order to do that you must think about how you are connected right now and if something needs to be shifted, or maybe the ways in which you aren’t connected to your experience at all.

Take some time this month to try and align yourself with your spirit – which really just means giving time to your passions and remembering why you are you. What makes you feel ‘in your skin’? What projects have you hidden in the shadows because you think you ‘should’ do something else? How have you been holding your true spirit back in your relationships or friendships? Ask your soul self the questions and be brave enough to take steps from the answers that you hear.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Scorpio / Scorpio Rising – The Princess of Wands

You’re back on the manifesting train again, hopefully because you have some of your fire back now that Mars has moved into your sign. Do you feel ready to move? The great thing about the energy for you this month is that it’s a wonderful combination of desire and action. You know there’s no point in dallying around, and if you actually want to see things change and move onwards then you need to put in the work. I’m not so much cracking the whip here but more encouraging you to make plans and stick to them!

Everything that you want needs a space to grow from, so this month is the perfect time to be reshuffling and making space. If you are planning to move house then it’s time to get ready. Clean up in your current situation – what bills need paying, and what old belongings could you sell or donate? Get your energy ready to shift and then when the time comes, you’ll be ready. It’s essentially a process of making things easier for yourself. Instead of being so super active and quite the procrastinator, let’s go with the super powered Scorpio energy this month ok?

So think; what isn’t working right now? And how can you shake up your structure so that you regain a sense of flow? It can be easy to tune too much into the ‘I cant’s’ or ‘why is this happening’ moments, when what you need to do is at least embrace the option of expansion to see your way through a challenge. It might be as small as just saying to yourself; ‘I know there is a more expansive way of viewing this today.’ It’s time to see where you are in your own way, step back and take a look from a new viewpoint. From a different perspective, it may be obvious what you need to move in order to make space.

Over the next few weeks practice the ultimate manifesting practice. I believe it goes like this: Intention – What are you aiming for? What do you want to feel like? How can you honor your journey more? Then, Action – Make moves in the direction of your dreams, practical measures. Finally – Surrender rather than obsess. Keep everything in the day and work moment by moment and see how things suddenly seem to weave themselves together.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Sagittarius / Sagittarius Rising – The Princess of Swords

In what ways are you not connected to your inner truth right now? I’m feeling as though you’ve allowed your own personal power to slip to the sidelines. This may have manifested in a variety of ways – a dip in confidence perhaps? Are you finding yourself more judgmental of yourself and others recently? Feeling neglected by life? There is a need for you to recalibrate your inner strength this month – and not in the way that you might usually go about it.

There is often a tendency to just ‘pull yourself together’, stand up put on a brave face and say you are fine. Sure that does work, but it’s not addressing what’s at the heart of the matter, and doesn’t really nurture your whole self. I want you to go within, big time! This is about upping your relationship with your inner soul system and choosing not to ignore your gut.

I’m often wary of using that word – ‘gut’ – because sometimes the ego likes to join that party. I want you to start to focus with on just checking in with how you feel and how your body feels. Notice what or whom you feel you are pulling away from and start to think about why. If you find yourself with all sorts of ideas and opinions about other people, remember that everyone is a mirror.

If you are speaking negatively about someone then it’s going to be pulling something out that you’re actually feeling about yourself. It’s a good month to do some autonomous writing; open up a notepad and just brain spill out on to the page. You might discover that it’s your own inner dialogue towards yourself that needs clarifying and brightening in order for the world to seem a little less cold.

So back to your own sense of empowerment; check in with how much you’ve been taking on that you haven’t really felt connected to or inspired by. Quite a few things maybe? Being spiritual means quite simply, ‘to honour your spirit.’ So how can you do that over the next few weeks? Go back to basics and connect to your passions and interests and allow that to boost your inner strength. With this in line it’s a lot easier to step into your power, own your experience, feel less threatened and ultimately, have more fun!

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Capricorn / Capricorn Rising – The Seven of Swords

Last month I encouraged you to allow some stillness and take some rest – with that, I feel that you may be facing up to some old fears surrounding issues of trust. I want to talk about how much you trust yourself right now and how much you have faith in your journey, because I feel that you could be feeling a little lost. It’s almost as if you don’t trust in your own viewpoint or knowledge, and that often comes in when we have disconnected from our mind and body.

You have had a busy stretch of year and a lot of climbing uphill, not to mention a lot of trying to please others going on. This is draining and it translates into a lack of confidence so easily. The thing is, you are no less brilliant than you have ever been, you haven’t lost your personal power but you may have left it on a shelf somewhere out of reach.

I’d like you to try to reconnect to your feelings of potential, remember what your hopes are, and remember what makes you feel good. Stop trying to be something for everyone else. If you are connected and aligned with your self fully then everything around you will sit better – work, friendships, health and relationships. It’s time to reclaim your power and your personality, no one can take these things from you but it’s easy to give them away or forget they are yours in the first place. You might be feeling wary of who to trust right now, or how to make a decision – perhaps you’re worried about making the wrong choice somewhere along the line? Again, this is only a reflection of the state your inner system is in, so consciously choosing to have faith in your own steps will help you to find your balance in the external world.

You’re not here to play small, hide behind yourself or to not participate in your adventure. Take note of anywhere you are sidelining and reel yourself back in. Have you been looking after your body? Have you been listening to your intuition? Have you been honoring your passions? Make some plans to get connected, sit still and listen to what is going on – if you are jittery and don’t want to be by yourself then keep sitting. Get comfortable in your own uncomfortable, it’s time to check back in.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Aquarius / Aquarius Rising – The Prince of Cups

How committed are you feeling right now? Across the board; what are you inching yourself away from? Where are you hiding? What are you missing? In order to experience the changes that you wish to see you must get present with the fears that these questions unearth within you. If you feel unable to commit to something or someone there is a need to go deeper and work out why, because it’s not about what’s happening externally – it’s all about you.

You are head first in your journey right now, which is why I want to make sure you are wide-awake. It’s easy to think that life is passing you by, but this only happens if you aren’t present for the experience, or aren’t actively invested in the adventure. Being a dreamer is wonderful, but you need some action in there too, otherwise it all gets a bit never-never land and you can feel let down and lost. So it’s time to really sink your teeth in and be ready to really feel everything, and maybe that will include having to feel the negative or sad feelings that you don’t want to. But it’s okay. You are on your way to a new sense of material and spiritual balance so you need to attend to both.

On the spiritual side, getting seriously connected to your spirit is easier than you think – it really just requires you to be respectful of your own passions and take note of your feelings. Try not to block yourself in with ‘I shoulds’ and ‘I cant’s’. Instead, remind yourself of your potential and of what you have overcome in the past. In the material world check in with how fulfilled you are at work and in your relationships. Is there a spark of excitement for something of someone that you haven’t really even addressed?

Romantically this is essential, to be honest with your own feelings and not be scared of failing, not hide in your shadows because of a fear of rejection. The more you are in your own body and truth the brighter you appear. Don’t be afraid of being vulnerable; shift your strength to an attitude of just trying. Life is happening, your life is happening, all you need to do is show up.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Pisces / Pisces Rising – The Three of Pentacles

Oh hey over there Pisces, rise and shine! You’ve been through the mill this year, but then again that’s often what being a Pisces is all about – you soak up everything and yet you know everything, so it’s a back and forth shift between feeling overwhelmed and super powered. Keep reaching for the latter.

So on we go. This month is all about the rotation of learning and teaching. You are talented, you have talents and you have passions, many more than many people, and it’s essential you recognize them now. I believe it is our duty to share our spirit with others, because it helps them get more spirited themselves, and we do this via sharing skills and sharing knowledge. You are being called to rise up and accept master status of your own life, okay?

Yep, that means hatching a new plan for the next few months, and you don’t have to do it alone. You see the great thing about being so creative or just having so many ideas is that you can let your energy be fuelled up in the positive way by collaborating with others and simply asking for help. It is essential for you to recharge alone, but you know there is a fine line between alone and lonely, or just plain isolation. When you’re home alone, it can feel like you aren’t being appreciated by the outside world, which in turn makes you want to retreat an hide. But it’s actually time to step out. So tame the ego part of the inner dialogue that wants to be recognized. Simply make it your intention to share, and it’s from here that you might receive the respect that you are hoping for.

You’re also in a fine position to be laying foundations for what’s to come – and lifting out of a bit of a low period. Actually we all are, it’s been an odd year so far. So allow yourself to shake it out and shake it off a little, and choose to believe in yourself and your potential to get up and do what you want to do. Just recognize that opportunities don’t always appear in the form that you want or expect them to, and that to receive the best you need to think and be as expansive as possible. Be wide-awake and ready.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Aries / Aries Rising – The Emperor

After last month’s spin of the wheel do you have a little more of a sense of direction when it comes to where you’re going or what you want? Either way, this month is going to crack the whip on you and get you further into the driving seat. Whenever this card comes up we really need to respect order, discipline and prepare to work with the divine masculine!

Whaaat, how do we do that? Okay, so this card is basically pure Mars energy. Your ruler, Mars is the planet that governs our impulses, passions, sex-drive, and all things action oriented; it’s your truest source of power. Mars has just moved into Scorpio, a sign it also has great affinity with, and so it’s likely that you (who is always at the forefront) have a bunch of things you just want to get done. Now.

So, have a think about how you can set the pace in a way which is a) Going to be productive and b) Not going to burn you out and blast you to the floor. I think you can channel this masculine Mars power into a force of protection for your material and spiritual health. It’s time to step up and be strict, but not in the boring overpowering (Saturn) way, but by doing what you do best – channeling your stubbornness into a super power. I know you can get behind this. So I want you to be hell bent on being good to yourself, on nurturing your journey and devoting time to what feels good. You are also going to tap yourself on the shoulder and say ‘get on with it’ and not listen to your fears and their limiting ideas.

Procrastination, after all is just a fear of change and the unknown, it’s a fear of failure and of success. The reason we hold back from pursuing what we want is because we sure as hell don’t know what it will look like when we get it. Scary! But you know what, maybe things will turn out even better than you hoped? Standing in the background just wishing or waiting won’t ever bring the results that you’ve come to desire and respect. So preserve and respect your life force by making the most of it. Get things in order, clear your office, clean up your inner dialogue and blast away any negative energy you’ve been carrying around. Get to it.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Taurus / Taurus Rising – The Devil

This card is moving through the zodiac in my readings here, and it’s easy to see and go ‘uh oh… what does THAT mean?’ But it only ever highlights something that we are completely and utterly aware of. Yes, The Devil brings in our fears and our temptations, but with that a great opportunity to face them. I like to laugh at my own fears and their tiny ideas. I like to hang out in their company and choose not listen to them. I like to walk up to them in the street and say ‘hey,’ but not stay to chat.

You see the thing with fear, it’s always around. It’s an everyday thing, but we tend to give too much energy to it. We use fear like a swimming pool and dive in and let it wash over and under us. It’s so easy to fall in the pool and it’s terribly difficult to climb out.

So this month I want you to practice just listening to what the fears that come up are, then sitting with them, not running in the opposite direction or trying to fight them, but just being present with them. Now have a look at what your go to temptations are. It might be certain thought patterns, a habit you repeat or something negative you indulge in. Look at any addictive or obsessive tendencies and be present with them and try and not judge yourself. To overcome the parts of us that we perceive to be the darkest we have to shine light on them and, actually, love them. None of us are without our demons.

The thing about our own Devil is that he gets in the way, distracts us from our better path and highest self and detours us towards fear. Your job this month is to note where you are switching direction and try and liberate yourself. Sit with the word ‘freedom’ and see what it means to you. What would be mean to be able to untie your own bound up self? Remind yourself that you aren’t a slave or a victim to yourself or anything and your intention to be well and kind to yourself is everything. Ultimately this month, be considerate to yourself, know that anxiety and stress are normal, you are not broken, and there is nothing ‘wrong’ with you. Allow yourself to feel free.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Gemini / Gemini Rising – The Wheel of Fortune

Like many of us you are in a period of change, and over the next few weeks you might get a little bit more in touch with where you cycle is spinning. You of all signs can often caught up in the whirlwind, and can either be flying high or feeling utterly overwhelmed. It’s time to make the choice to really balance out a bit. This can be done via feeling your way through life a little more. Instead of wanting to know what everything ‘means’ just focus on how you are feeling about every situation that is coming your way, the highs and the lows.

Last month I was encouraging you to expand yourself into a more magical state of mind, and this is an attitude you can hold onto as a permanent part of your mindset. Now, you are called to participate in your adventure even more so, and to really welcome in the change and shifts that you are a part of. I feel you’ve reached a turning point, and you will soon know exactly where you are at. This might relate to something obvious, like a new job opportunity or moving house, or something subtler like a shift within your mind or body. When the wheel starts spinning it is always stressful – so know that, and don’t expect yourself to be feeling relaxed and chilled out during these stops and starts. Be kind to yourself and just be present with it all.

On the empowerment side of things, where are you placing your energy? And where are you placing your will? Beware of sidelining and getting caught up in bells and whistles, false promises or your own ‘shoulds’ and ‘coulds.’ Remember that
Destiny is only your partner in crime, and that you do get a say in things. Try to not resist change, and remember that good change still feels strange because it still ushers in the unknown – and that this is okay too. We don’t want to stay wrapped up in situations that aren’t good for us, just because we’re comfortable and familiar with how they feel.

Finally, don’t fret if things aren’t moving at the speed that you’d like them to. Amp up your intentions and put in some actions, then allow the Universe to give a helping hand. It’s all feeling a little mysterious but clear skies and clarity are en route.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse

 

Cancer / Cancer Rising – The Ace of Swords

This month is all about clarity and pulling yourself together so that you can really feel good. It’s likely that the last month was quite active with ideas and creativity and now all that air activity is bringing forth the best your mind has got! I believe in the power of just one thought. Once we go beyond that we can dive into fear and anxiety territory – a.k.a. overwhelm. But sense of clarity that comes when you pair your intuition with your intelligence in one pure thought is empowering and exciting. Is that what you’re seeking right now?

To find these moments of empowerment we need to work on our own sense of trust. After all, how will you know when you know if you don’t trust yourself enough to believe the guidance that comes from within? I’d like you to set aside at least five minutes each day to sit and listen to your inner dialogue, to be quiet and to give yourself space. Yes, it’s what some people call meditation, but it’s also whatever you want it to be. You can’t do this wrong, but I can’t guarantee it will be comfortable. Sometimes our sharpest insights come from sitting and feeling fidgety and feeling uncomfortable. So sit down with questions and intentions.

What are the areas of your life that you need clarity on? I feel for some of you there are shifts in career and feelings of self worth, so you may need to sit down and summon some self-confidence in, to remind you that you can trust in the changes you are bringing in. For relationships it’s time to listen to your own truths. Are you on equal ground? Is there a proper balance happening? Do you feel you are giving some of your power away? Asking yourself questions is a powerful way to reclaim your present moment and the strength to make decisions.

Notice if you are using the dreaded ‘should’ word and experiment with shifting your dialogue to something more expansive, something that embraces possibility and opportunity. Keep connecting your thoughts with your feelings, and watch how your body always responds positively in a moment of truth. We often refer to epiphanies as only happening once in a while, but when you are truly aligned in your holistic self then all thoughts can be this powerful.

Questions? Come and chat with me about how your month is going @louniverse