WHAT I LEARNED AT PRIESTESS SCHOOL

Seeking to reawaken her innate magic, Ani Ferlise enrolled in Priestess School. She shares how you can embody this ancient vocation …

priestess school ani ferlise kozmic ryder graell corsini priestess graell ashland goddess temple ruby warrington the numinous material girl mystical world the now age goddess temple of ashland
Graell Corsini and The Goddess Temple of Ashland

Four years ago, I was feeling alone and unfulfilled. I was dissatisfied with the way I’d spent my college years, and I was frustrated with what was expected of me. And so, seeking more of the magic I had always felt in my heart, I left New York and moved to small, magical, Ashland, in Oregon—and it was here I first heard the word “Priestess.”

I had found my way to Graell Corsini, a loving, fiery, pixie Priestess, and founder of the Goddess Temple of Ashland. The Temple itself, a beautiful dome, is surrounded by gardens, flowing mineral springs, beehives, and tall oak trees. Inside, you are greeted by a wood stove and an altar, decked with Samhain decorations and offerings. Immediately on arriving here, I felt something nostalgic and familiar awaken inside of me.

I began my working for Graell at temple “melissae,” cleaning the temple, organizing, sprucing up the altars, and clearing the space. One year later, I asked Graell if she would be willing to do a one-on-one apprenticeship with me and teach me how to Priestess for myself. Over the course of a few short weeks, I immersed myself completely in this ancient vocation.

What I learned totally blew me open, while new insights continue to unfold every day. This is what I have learned so far about the Priestess way …

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A Priestess brings magic to the mundane
Graell told me how part of her practice was to make places more beautiful than when she arrived. If she goes into a bathroom that’s dirty, she cleans it. Graell sees this act alone as a living prayer, bringing the sacred to something so everyday. That’s just one example. Taking a shower can become an energetic cleanse, with lavender or rosemary soap, as you visualize the heaviness of the day going down the drain. Cooking can become kitchen witchery when you say, “Thank you for nourishing me,” as you stir intention into your split pea soup with a wooden spoon. The way you Priestess will be as unique as your fingerprints.

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A Priestess honors the darkness along with the light
Focusing only on the light is a major imbalance in the spiritual world—for we are made of love, light, AND a deep, deep darkness. We are all born from the darkness. The womb-space, the unknown, the place of rebirth. We confront our darkness every day, and to deny this is to deny yourself of your humanity. The deep, dark unknown must not only be looked at but loved. To honor the darkness, the unknown, the places that scare us in ourselves and in life, is sacred.

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A Priestess does not have to be perfect to be in service
We are all capable of manipulation, of stretching the truth a little too much, of judgements, of ignorance, and more. We are always going to be exploring our motivations. Being of service doesn’t require ridding yourself of these human parts. The Priestess approach is to muster up your strength, vulnerability, and courage, and instead of trying to rid yourself of imperfections, to nourish and be gentle with yourself, so that you are overflowing with love. Everything that is not in alignment will then flow out of you naturally.

priestess school ani ferlise kozmic ryder graell corsini priestess graell ashland goddess temple ruby warrington the numinous material girl mystical world the now age goddess temple of ashland
The Temple

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A Priestess creates sacred space
Holding sacred space is a beautiful opportunity with a lot of responsibility. This space can be energetic or physical. You can push your cart into the cereal aisle at the supermarket while a toddler is throwing a tantrum, and you can ask the mother how she’s doing. Or you can be in ceremony, looking each person in the eye, letting them know that you hear them. You never know when the opportunity to hold space will show up!

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A Priestess nurtures self always
Being a Priestess means creating a (literal) sacred space for you, too. This space is used to pray and to nurture yourself—a place, when something is too big for you, to give it over to the Higher. Natural disasters, terrorism, and societal injustice, are impossible to take on by yourself, nor are you supposed to. You are here to do your part, and whatever is beyond you needs to have a place to go. So create that space. Organize, clean, and beautify it, so you can show up AND feel held.

Whether it is a home altar, a spare room, dresser drawer, or even your car dashboard, use whatever is accessible. My altar has each of the elements represented, and I use the Wheel of the Year for my inspiration. I keep it beautiful and divinely scented with flowers and plants based on the season, with candles and oils to match, and with crystals and incense to set the tone.

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A Priestess celebrates life with ceremony
Every life event can have a ceremony or ritual. Going through a breakup? Moving into a new home? Feeling grateful? Needing to cut ties from a person? Yearning to honor a loss? Ceremony is key to bringing the mythic to the seemingly mundane. Ritual is an invitation for the sacred to come in. While there’s nothing like having a trained guide for major life gateways, there are many opportunities to support yourself during times of transition. For example, if you just experienced a break up, take a cleansing bath with rose quartz, and drink a heart-opening and nourishing tea like Damiana.

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A Priestess is a part of nature
When you begin to pay attention to the transitions of the seasons, the shifting of the Sun from sign to sign, and the phases of the Moon, it’s hard to understand how we are supposed to operate separately from nature. Like the Moon and the tides she turns, our lives ebb and flow. From socializing to solitude, from sadness to joy, from confusion to certainty, and from giving to receiving—a Priestess understands that we too are constantly cycling. Be gentle with your tides.

My life has changed significantly since becoming initiated as a Priestess. I came to Graell searching for meaning, and what she taught me is that we find this in making the world better than when we find it, in ways big and small.

priestess school ani ferlise kozmic ryder graell corsini priestess graell ashland goddess temple ruby warrington the numinous material girl mystical world the now age goddess temple of ashland
Ani at Priestess School

Embracing the magic in the mundane lights a fire in my heart like nothing else has. Turn toward those who have walked this path before you, for more guidance on living a sacred life. If you have any questions, you can find me at kozmicryder.com or @kozmicryder on Instagram, and Graell Corsini at the Ashland Goddess Temple and at priestessgraell.com.

WHY THE GODDESS DIANA IS A FEMINIST ICON

As the heat of Leo Season urges us to sparkle and shine, the myth of the Goddess Diana shows how to stoke the flames of our wildness, says Rebecca Farrar …

goddess diana the numinous ruby warrington rebecca farrar wild witch of the west material girl mystical world
Photo: Kyle Loftus

As one of the few virgin goddesses, Diana represents being whole unto oneself, and her myth honors this wild and free part of our nature.

According to legend, she begs her father, Jupiter, to liberate her from marriage and motherhood so that she can roam free with her friends, the Nymphs and hunting dogs.

Diana’s name comes from the Proto-Indo-European meaning “to shine,” and derives from the same Latin root meaning ”daylight.” In Ancient Rome, she was celebrated with August’s festival Nemoralia, or Festival of the Torches. During the weeklong tradition, hunting was forbidden and dogs were instead decorated with flowers. Her followers carried torches to Lake Nemi, outside of Rome, and left offerings of fruit in the forest.

While she is often thought of as a Moon goddess, she is also an active, protective force of the forest, known as the Goddess of the Hunt. Diana’s independence and caring instincts create a beautiful balance between lunar and solar energies—something we can all model as we seek to integrate the masculine and feminine energies within ourselves, creating a more equitable world.

Diana links us to sisterly love, feminism, and action heroines. Her archetype is reflected in our own psyches as WILDNESS in its purest form, and our connection to creatures and nature alike … 

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The asteroid Diana, discovered in 1863 by a German astronomer, currently sits at 20 degrees Aries, near Eris, the sister outsider. Together, these two asteroids in such a strong fire sign uplift and empower feminine energies.

Diana’s placement in our birth chart points to where we crave freedom and yearn to be barefoot running through the forest with our animal companions. It may also reveal where we are constantly on the “hunt” for something.

**To find Diana in your chart, go to  astro.com, enter your birth information, choose “Extended Chart Selection,” scroll down to “Additional Objects,” and type in 78.

Use the suggestions below to come more into contact with the many facets of Diana and her wild nature:

1st house // This placement suggests an identity empowered by the Diana’s protector and warrior. Try archery or another form of outdoor solo sport to awaken this natural protector energy.

2nd house// Diana had a deep love for nature and the Earth. Foraging for food or forest bathing would be fun hobbies to build a relationship with this archetype.

3rd house// Athena was known for her intellect, but Diana was in constant communication with her companions. Study bird communication, bird watching, or read about animal behavior.

4th house// Diana was well-known for being a protector of women and children. In this placement she is deeply intimate with the lunar and menstrual cycles. Pay attention to the Moon’s cycles and spend time at night outside, soaking up its light. (**Side-note: Ruby has her Diana here, so makes total sense she set up Moon Club!)

5th house// During Diana’s weeklong celebration, creating fire and more sources of light was an important element. Talents such as starting a fire or wood splitting are necessary wild skills to explore with a 5th house Diana.

6thhouse// Running around in the forest, it was important for Diana to know which plants did what. This location in the chart implies botany and plant identification as a way to honor the goddess.

7th house// Diana had lovers, both male and female, though wasn’t in a committed partnership, as her energy was instead more focused on appreciating nature. Experiment with art using sticks, pine needles, or tree bark for a woodsy aesthetic.

8th house// Spending most of her time outside, Diana was also deeply attuned to nature’s death and life cycles. With fall on the horizon, learn more about how different trees stay alive in winter and make it a point to notice the change in seasons. You may also want to study more about the many esoteric traditions that honor the Tree of Life.

9th house// The exploratory and adventurous side of Diana meant she was constantly on the move. Stray from the familiar forest trail and discover new ground, whether it be a new hiking area, tree climbing, or a forest on another side of the world.

10th house// With this placement, Diana strives to be sensible and to own her authority. She craves solitude and self-reliance. Take classes on wilderness survival or utilize the forest’s gifts for your quiet contemplation.

11th house// An 11th house Diana exemplifies her need for freedom and liberation from traditional roles. Focus on cultivating community with other wild souls who crave time in nature, such as communal hiking or camping.

12th house// Nature may evoke a mystical or flow state experience in this house. Imagination, such as photography or film, may be a gift, or even taking time to meditate under a tree.

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Photo: Ben Waardenburg

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And no matter where the asteroid is in your chart, harness your own wild and free spirit with the suggestions below … especially potent during her festival from August 13-17th! 

// Food // Easily foraged foods such as mushrooms or berries, or seasonal fruits and vegetables.

// Workout // A run or walk through the forest, perhaps spending some time bird watching. If you are extra adventurous, an archery lesson would certainly make Diana shine.

// Watch // Hunger Games or Wild (Katniss and Cheryl Strayed both connect well with Diana’s spirit). Or try the documentaries American Revolution: The Evolution of Grace Lee Boggsor, and Maya Angelou’s And Still I Rise.

// Read // Rachel Carson (or other eco-feminist authors), Audre Lorde, Malala Yousafzai, and Gloria Steinem (because Diana loves activism and empowered women). Or try the classic, Women Who Run With the Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estés.

// Home // Diana’s home is nature, so bring more of it indoors by decorating with pine cones and leaves, or wood art. She is also linked to forest creatures such as deer or rabbits. Adding touches, such as deer antlers or a papier-mâché deer head, will also do the trick.

GUIDE TO THE GODDESS URANIA

With this month’s Equinox paving the way for cosmic change, it’s the perfect moment to harness the electricity and innovation of the Goddess Urania, says Rebecca Farrar

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Photo by Max Felner 

Long before astronomy and astrology became separated, the myth of Goddess Urania inspired philosophical questions about our connection to the starry heavens above. You can find her energy today in planetariums, and she is activated any time we consider our cosmic context or become enchanted with our celestial existence.

We have her to thank for instilling us with wonder, awe, and curiosity, and for cultivating the spirit of discovery and innovation.

Urania comes from the Greek word “Ouranos” meaning “all of the heavens.” In Greek mythology, she was the daughter of Zeus and the mother-muse Mnemosyne, as well as great granddaughter to Uranus himself. She dressed in a cloak with stars and her mighty accessories were a globe and stylus, said to represent the world’s mysteries. It was said by ancient poets that she was able to predict the future by looking at the stars.

Astronomically, Urania was the 30th asteroid discovered in 1854, and is currently hanging out one-degree away from Neptune in Pisces where it will remain for the next few years, guiding our intuition and sky wisdom. In this placement, astrology and astronomy serve as perfect spiritual practices for contemplating the vastness of our solar system and how to integrate it into our own lives.

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While Uranus leans towards the collective and generational experience, Urania gives us a taste of our unique relationship to the heavens. Explore your own cosmic connection and curiosity by finding Urania in your own chart.

**To find Urania in your chart, go to astro.com, enter your birth information, choose “Extended Chart Selection,” scroll down to “Additional Asteroids,” and type in 30.

Use the suggestions below to discover how you can ground heavenly energies into your life and be inspired to innovate …

1st house// What aspect of your soul’s purpose inspires you to innovate the most? Learning about your life purpose as it relates to your astrology chart can be a tool, so can Human Design, Myer’s Briggs, or other purpose-driven systems that can align your heart with the heavens. Alternatively, organize a planetarium visit solo or with a group, as long as you lead.

2nd house// How can you ground more cosmic wisdom into your relationships, and what aspect of relating are you often most curious about? Urania connects universal love with our personal experience, and helps us notice that the ways we love are both unique to us and also a part of the collective. Take time to look at patterns in your relating that may connect you more deeply to love itself.

3rd house// What are things you have always wanted to learn about, related to science, mathematics, astronomy or other topics? The more we learn about the complexity of our universe, the more we might just find new ways of thinking about things on Earth. Perhaps take an astronomy class or read books or studies by astrophysicists (I currently have a crush on Mike Brown, the guy who discovered Eris).

4th house// How do you feel about the vastness of your connection to everything and everyone? Does it overwhelm you or make you feel more safe? More than any other Urania placement, it’s important for you to feel at home and safe in our solar system. Try decorating your home with celestial themes or symbols to remind you of your innate cosmic connection. I suggest wall prints with your Sun and Moon sign constellations.

5th house// What aspects of human life enchant or evoke awe for you? Great art can inspire you to innovate and create in your own life. Consider the solar system through the lens of creativity or self-expression- look up artists who were inspired by the cosmos such as Vasily Kandinsky or Van Gogh.

6th house// How has your day-to-day routine lacked curiosity or excitement? While things may seem to be orderly in the universe, it is both predictable and has enough strangeness to confuse even the best of scientists. Find a way to shake things up, using the starry heavens for inspiration. You might try tracking constellations or going outside at night and noticing planetary movements.

7th house// What is your relationship to aesthetics and how do you find more of your own personal style? More than any other placement, you may experience Urania as a sacred “other” or muse. Our solar system has its own harmony and perfect balance. Try relating to this through aesthetics in jewelry and clothing, such as hoop earrings symbolizing the symmetry of orbits or other patterns.

8th house// How do you honor the power of the unknown in your life? Connect with the sensation of dark matter or black holes- places where light can’t exist and yet are the most powerful forces in the cosmos. Take a trip down the Google rabbit hole on the topic. You may walk away with an ever greater appreciation for the power of the darkness.

9th house// Ask yourself the same questions posed by early philosophers. Why am I here? What is the human relationship to the stars? Plan a trip or get curious about travel locations related to sacred star spots. You might start with the book “Heaven’s Mirror” by Graham Hancock, which discusses the possible relationships between constellation Sirius and the Pyramids of Egypt.

10th house// How do you relate to time and legacy? The cosmos is timeless in that it has existed for 13.7 billion years and yet the existence of humans has been but a blip. It takes seven minutes for the light of the Sun to reach Earth, and 150,000 years for other stars in our galaxy. Spend time thinking about what legacy you want to leave that would last years or centuries.

11th house// Who and what are your orbit? The solar system is a group of planetary bodies held together by gravity and mutual attraction. Often people with strong Uranian energies feel like aliens or black sheep in communities.  What are ways you can feel more included? Join a community connected to a topic that inspires you and find your fellow seekers.

12th house// How does music inspire you? The sounds of the universe and musical frequencies are deeply intertwined, and music and muse actually have the same root word. Listen to classical or ambient music (try Holsts’ Planets Symphony for starters), and pay attention to the complexity and mathematical connections. If you feel so inclined, write some of your own!

rebecca farrar ruby warrington the goddess urania june goddess guide the numinous material girl mystical world wild witch of the west
Photo by Jill Heyer

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And no matter where the asteroid is in your chart, here are ways to amuse your Uranian muse …

// Style // Black connects us to dark matter and the night sky. Wear it with intention for the vastness and expansion. Obviously clothing with constellations or planetary bodies are a hell yes.

// Food //My naturopath once told me that eating dark-colored food connected me to the cosmos. Gobble up blackberries, black sesame seeds, black mission figs, black rice, and beyond …

// Workout // Stroll under the stars or just sit under them like an old school philosopher or astronomer would.

// Watch // Cosmos with Neil deGrasse Tyson, Interstellar, ET, X-Files, or Hidden Figures

// Read //Anything by Carl Sagan or my former graduate school professor, cosmologist Brian Swimme

// Home // If you don’t already have them, add glow-in-the-dark stars to your ceiling or to other places where you’ll be able to see them at night. Add other fun pieces such as constellation art work or planetary mobiles.

// Healing // Meditate in the dark outside or channel cosmic energies with a Reiki session or a sound healing.

GUIDE TO THE GODDESS MAIA

As we move towards Spring’s peak, it’s time to delight in the playfully creative energies of the Goddess Maia, says Rebecca Farrar …

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Photo: Mari Lezhava

From the flowers blooming (aka plant sex organs!) to the weather warming, May is a month for delight and desire …

Named after the Earth Goddess Maia, or Maja, who represents passion, wishes, and playfulness, the month of May brings a slow burn after Ostara’s April spark. With the same root as the word “majesty,” Goddess Maia represents the peak of spring’s fertility and blooming.

Throughout history, May has been a month of celebrations, and in Roman, Greek, and Celtic traditions, Goddess Maia has represented sexuality, creativity, and growth. In ancient Greece and Rome, the first and fifteenth days of the month were particularly sacred for honoring her. And in Celtic traditions, Beltane or May Day rituals focused on feeding the senses. During the holiday, unmarried men and women jumped over bonfires wishing for partners and fertility, and the Maypole was originally a tree tied with flowers and ribbons, which represented the wrapping of female energies around the phallus. 

Goddess Maia also has an asteroid named after her. Astrologically, Maja is currently hanging out in tight conjunction with Neptune in Pisces. Making for a dreamy and romantic month ahead in May 2018 … 

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Tap into your own playful and sensuous Spring nature by finding Maia in your own chart. Wherever she’s placed, you’re invited to offer your wishes for more blossoming this month.

Below are questions to consider for reigniting creative sparks and growth with Maia’s help …

**To find Maia/Maja in your chart, go to astro.com, enter your birth information, choose “Extended Chart Selection,” scroll down to “Additional Asteroids,” and type in 66.

1st house// Where do I lack purpose or intention in my life? How can I become re-inspired?

2nd house// What makes my heart beat faster? Is it specific people, activities, being outside?

3rd house// Which books, media, or resources provoke or scintillate me? Conversely, which ones dull my senses or excitement?

4th house// How do my emotions put me into contact with my artistic process? How can I use them as fuel for my own fire?

5th house// Where and how do I experience my creative spark? What makes me shine and light up?

6th house// What habits or routines help me stimulate my imagination? How can I add them into my day-to-day rituals?

7th house// Have I been putting aside my own creativity because I’ve been focusing too much on others? Instead, can this relationship put me in touch with my own muse?

8th house// What kindling is missing from my inspiration fire? Do I need more nurturing, community, or time alone?

9th house// How can I re-create my own life vision and come more into alignment? Are there places I need to expand into or explore physically or emotionally?

10th house// Where have my passions been left behind in place of responsibility? How can I commit more to my own passion projects?

11th house// When and where do I come into contact with my creativity in the world? Is it through others or alone?

12th house// How can I move out of wishful thinking and fantasy around something I care about? What concrete actions can I take?

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Photo: Caique Silva

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And no matter where the asteroid is in your chart, here are ways to connect to the seductive Spring goddess this May …

// Style // Show some skin, or your favorite body part- whatever makes you feel sexy

// Food //Sensual and decadent foods such as figs, truffles, or dark chocolate

// Workout // Think playful and sexy … pole dancing or Zumba

// Home // Add a romantic touch with flowers, soft colors, candles, or fairy lights

// Healing // Sacred sex practices alone or with a partner

APRIL GODDESS GUIDE: OSTARA

With the cosmos bursting into Spring bloom, it’s prime time for channeling Ostara, says Rebecca Farrar. Find out where you’re ready for renewal, with her April Goddess Guide …

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Photo: Joe Robles

Ostara, aka Spring Equinox in the Pagan tradition, is named after the Germanic goddess of spring, fertility, and the dawn. Also spelled Eostre, which is where our words for “East” and “Easter” both come from, her name means “to shine.”

And while Ostara and the zodiac sign Aries come from different traditions, her symbolism has become intertwined with Spring renewal practices in the West, and both archetypes help us welcome the new season with gusto. One myth recounts that Ostara found a bird dying from the cold and changed it to a rabbit to keep it warm (Easter bunny anyone?)

Astrologically, Ostara is currently hanging out at one-degree Sagittarius, offering regrowth that expands our current sense of vision. She’ll be retrograding through July 9th back through Scorpio and joining Jupiter, reminding us that the shadow aspects of ourselves still need digging before our new story can fully emerge.

In our personal natal chart Ostara represents where and how we are renewed. In the shadow expression, she may represent the places we avoid darkness or shadow in favor of new beginnings.

As a harbinger of spring, she is a pioneer who welcomes us into the dawning of ourselves personally and collectively.

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Find out where you’re ready for personal renewal, rebirth, or even perhaps a full-blown reboot … 

**To find Ostara in your chart, go to astro.com, enter your birth information, choose “Extended Chart Selection,” scroll down to “Additional Asteroids,” and type in 343.

PRO-TIP: If the asteroid is next to your Sun, Moon, Rising, or Midheaven, the archetypal energy of renewal and “dawning” will take on an even more potent, personal meaning for you.

1st house// Take time to explore or revisit your personal mission or create a new exercise/physical health routine.

2nd house// Finances, a sense of security, or earning power may require you to reshape your goals.

3rd house// Learning and education are emphasized- try out a new class, perhaps one related Spring themes.

4th house// Work with ancestors, heritage or emotional inner security as a way to revitalize your family connections.

5th house// Find a renewed desire towards your personal creativity or even performing in the spotlight.

6th house// Adjusting day-to-day habits and routines can help you find a personal sense of rebirth.

7th house// Be on the lookout for new business partnerships or perhaps revamp your love life by seeing it with new eyes.

8th house// During a season with fewer inward hours, vulnerability could offer a new way to access your depths.

9th house// Plan a trip, or explore other ways to find renewal by creating a sense of adventure.

10th house// Your “legacy” may take on a new meaning during this phase- explore it by finding common threads between all of your skills and talents.

11th house// Feeling stuck around a sense of community may invite you to dive into new groups or alternative networks.

12th house// Try a new meditation or explore playing instruments to access flow-state potential for a much needed rejuvenation.

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Photo: Sarah Gray

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And no matter where the asteroid is in your chart, here are ways to work with Ostara this Aries Season … (I for one will most likely be listening to Celene Dion’s “A New Day” on repeat while eating eggs!)

// Style // Go for flowy tops and skirts with sun rise, sherbet colors like corals or orangish hues.

// Food // Eat eggs dishes- quiches, frittatas, omelettes, etc.

// Workout // Yoga sun salutations facing East at sunrise.

// Home // Put flowers in the sunrise area of your home or add something bright to the Eastern-facing part of your space.

// Healing // Get enough Vitamin D from the sunshine, Light Therapy, or flower essences. And practice strong self-care and self-parenting by paying extra close attention to your inner child needs.

WHAT CAN GODDESS APHRODITE TEACH YOU ABOUT LOVE?

As Pisces season brings on the deep emo vibes, George Lizos tells us how the Goddess Aphrodite can help us start calling in the flavor of love we need right now …

Photo: Joanna Nix

Meeting Aphrodite … 
Growing up in Cyprus, the island where Aphrodite was reputedly born, my childhood was saturated with the art, stories, and myths surrounding the Goddess of Love. Everywhere you looked she was there, posing in her seductive nakedness in statues and paintings.

As an adult, dissatisfied with my love life and drained of feminine energy, I travelled back to my homeland with a single desire in mind: I wanted to know love more deeply, more fully. 

I drove to Aphrodite’s Rock, the beach where, according to Hesiod’s myth, the Goddess was born of the sea foam and washed upon the shore. And as I walked into the calm, cool water of the Mediterranean Sea, I felt layers upon layers of sexual shame, limiting beliefs around love, past hurts and resentments, all washing off of my body.

Right then and there, I met Aphrodite. And love finally made sense, for the first time.

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What can the Goddess Aphrodite teach you right now? 
Embodying Aphrodite invites us to accept and honor romantic love in all its meanings and layers. The four ancient epithets she’s been given mix the sea (sensual love), land (erotic love), and sky (spiritual love) energies. Read on to discover which of the four qualities of Goddess Aphrodite is currently missing from your life … 

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Photo: Zara Walker

1// Ourania (Sky element; Spiritual love): This is the spiritual, romantic essence of love, that’s best experienced when a couple is “in love” with each other. The experience of falling in love transcends the ego’s perception of love, helping us realize that in spiritual truth, that all is love. Call upon Ourania Aphrodite if you’re having trouble committing to, or falling in love with, a partner.

*How to Call Her In: Mentally place a pink rose within your heart. Visualize the rose blooming slowly and radiating pink light, allowing the energy of Ourania Aphrodite to replace any blocks you have around being vulnerable and opening your heart.

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2// Chrusee (Sea element; Sensual love): This is the love towards oneself that’s fundamental for healthy romantic relationships. It also includes the act of adorning your body with beautiful clothes, jewelry, oils, and perfume. Call upon Chrusee Aphrodite if you’re struggling with low self-esteem, lack of self-love, and body confidence.

*How to Call Her In: An unorthodox yet powerful way to embody Chrusee Aphrodite is by taking away all external body adornment props (i.e. jewelry, clothes, perfume), and facing yourself naked in the mirror. Closing your eyes, visualize your body emanating a bright golden light that reflects its inner, perfect beauty. Open your eyes and accept this new perspective as your truth.

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Photo: Hal Gatewood

3// Peitho (Land element; Persuasive Love): Playfulness, flirting, teasing, and being able to seduce a partner into meaningful romantic and sexual experiences. Call upon Peitho Aphrodite to attract vitality if your love life is feeling dull and stagnant.

*How to Call Her In: Buy or create a blend of rose, frankincense and myrrh essential oils. Add three drops in your palms, rub them together, and then use your hands to clear and energize your aura. These three oils were traditionally used for seduction by Aphrodite’s priestesses; instilling your aura with them will give you the inspiration you need to spice up your love life.

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4// Philommeides (Land element; Erotic love): The love of bodily pleasures and intimate sexual connection between lovers. Call upon Philommeides Aphrodite if you have a low sexual drive, have trouble enjoying sex, or lack sexual chemistry with your partner/s.

*How to Call Her In: Just as the name suggests, to embody Philommeides Aphrodite you need to learn to love and accept your genitalia. Spend time observing, exploring, and pleasuring yourself. Educate yourself in your own sexual rhythms, needs, and desires. Make peace with them, accept them without judgment, and let them guide the way in your sexual encounters.

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Photo: Michael Paz

Once you’ve channeled your personal Aphrodite, amp up the vibes with a beach ritual to honor romantic love in all its expressions. **And you can download the Orphic Hymn to Aphrodite HERE to infuse your ritual with even more magic!

-Sit or stand on the shoreline, at the point where the waves crash on the sand, and close your eyes. If you don’t have access to the sea, just visualize yourself there and you’ll still benefit from the meditation.

-Breathing in and out, ground yourself and allow your body to adjust to the fluid energy of this in-between place. Reflect on what it means to be at the meeting point of sea, land, and sky, which captures Aphrodite’s multi-layered essence.

-Either mentally or verbally say, “I am Aphrodite,” over and over again. The ‘I am’ statement invites the essence of Aphrodite into your present moment.

-When you establish a connection with the goddess, spend some time reflecting on your willingness to honor both earthly and heavenly love. Do you reject one or the other? Do you feel guilty about either? Are you willing to accept both in your life?

-With eyes closed, open your arms wide and receive the Aphrodite qualities you need in your life right now. As the hymn ends, hug the energy into your heart by gradually bringing your arms and hands to your chest.

-End the meditation by thanking Aphrodite for her continued presence in your life, and ask her to keep guiding you in embodying romantic love to its fullness.

George Lizos is a spiritual teacher, author of Be The Guru, and the creator of the Mermaid Bootcamp. He works with the angelic and elemental realms helping lightworkers find, follow, and fulfill their life purpose. To learn more about George visit georgelizos.com, and follow him on Instagram.

HOW THE PATRIARCHY MADE YOU FEAR FRIDAY 13TH—AKA “GODDESS DAY”

In the Goddess calendar, Friday 13th is the luckiest day of the year. Lucy North shares 10 simple rituals to reclaim the power of this sacred date with the Divine Feminine …

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Photo: Pansy 

One of the biggest “cosmic jokes” the patriarchal system has pulled on the Divine Feminine is the demonization of the number thirteen. Skipped in airplanes and hotels the world over, it’s become the scariest number within mass consciousness.

Possible justification for this comes from speculative claims that both The Last Supper and the Crucifixion allegedly happened on Friday 13th. But the patriarchy has always had it in for Friday 13th—and this is likely a cover up for something that runs much deeper.

Not only did the number 13 happen to be the luckiest number in the Goddess calendar, Friday 13th was the luckiest day of the year!

In Pagan times, the year was not divided into 12 months but 13. The new month began every 28 days, in accordance with a woman’s menstrual cycle and the New Moon. This was the Goddess calendar. Then the church got involved and … “rejigged” things. Looking to move power away from the Divine Feminine, it added two or three days onto each month and got rid of the 13th month.

February is the one month of the year that still only has 28 days, and this is out of respect to our original Girl Friday: Freyja, the Pagan Goddess of erotic love. Yes, Fri-day is also named after her (hello, date night!) So, this Friday 13th, let’s reunite with our Goddess roots—and honor this sacred day with some of the following rituals …

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1. Invoke the vibrant confidence and freedom of Freyja and smile at 13 women who you wouldn’t normally smile at or acknowledge.

2. How about doing something really wild—and going to bed really early! Freyja was instinctively connected to the rhythms of our planet, as all Goddesses are at heart. Being completely in sync with the earth, let’s go to sleep at sunset and get up at sunrise. For new Yorkers, this currently means tucking up at 6.20pm—and getting up at 7.30am. (Tip: Do this for one week and watch your life change. Your soul will love it.)

3. Patriarchal religions have drummed it into women that the only archetypes available to us are “virgin”, “whore”, “wife” and “mother.” No more! Write a small list on four pieces of paper under each of these archetypes. Now write out some of the emotional words associated with being or not “achieving” this archetype. Burn the paper.

4. Freyja’s nickname was Frigg—still a term for female self-pleasuring in the UK. There is actually a name for the fear of Friday 13th—”friggatriskaidekaphobia.” It has Freyja’s nickname in it, so the fear of this day is directly linked to a fear of women pleasuring themselves! So, let’s write this word out on a piece of paper—and burn that too.

Author Lucy North in Goddess mode …

5. It’s only patriarchal religions that have associated virginity with purity. In Freyja’s day, virgins were seen as dangerously vibrant—ready to burst forward with forthcoming sexual energy. If there has ever been a day dedicated to sacred self-love, a Kundalini wake up call, or divine sexual union, this is it.

6. After today, our next Friday 13th will be in April 2018. In tune with the seasons, dedicate a moment today to thinking of something that you want to incubate and work on over the next six months. It might be a new project, a new way of thinking, or a life goal. Put in place a plan for how this can come to fruition, in time for April’s Friday 13th—when Freyja’s energy will be rising with the vibrant reawakening of Spring!

7. The number 13 was also the number of witches in a coven. Text 12 of your friends—and wish them a Happy Goddess Day!

8. Take a moment to take 13 deep breaths. With each in breath, breathe in the positive energy you wish to receive on each of the next 13 lunar cycles. Allow the out breath to represent the releasing of all that is no longer serving you. Like the tides of the ocean that come in and out of the shore, allow your breath to rise and fall like waves. Be at one with the rhythms of the moon, the ocean and your own divinity.

9. Many of the flowers dedicated to Freyja within Pagan folklore are not in season right now. But google-search images of snowdrops, Cowslips, Wild Daisies, and other flowers, such as the Harlequin-bonnet Columbine and the Scarlet Pimpernel, and you’re good to go! Send a quick sketch or drawing of one of these flowers as a gift to a male friend or colleague, your partner, your son – or a friend’s little boy. The celebration of Friday 13th is not just for women—it’s for ALL genders! And drawing and painting is a fantastic meditation practice. Even is it’s a doodle on your iPad!

10. Freyja’s sacred tree was the Linden Tree (known as the Lime in the UK). If you have one near you, this weekend is definitely the time to go pay it a visit and give it a hug!

Lucy North is a writer, meditation teacher, and artist. She will be running a Women Who Run With The Wolves healing circle on tomorrow evening (Saturday October 14th) at Maha Rose in Greenpoint Brooklyn. Click HERE to reserve your spot.

WHY YOU SHOULD BE CHANNELING THE GODDESS FREYJA

Channeling the fiercely feminine ancient goddess Freyja in her brand new collection, YCL Jewels founder Fabienne talks ritualistic adornment, powerful women as modern muses, and the non-negotiable practice of self-love …

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“Everything that we put into our body is literally the makeup of ourselves and our being. It’s equally important to think about what we put on our physical body (clothing, jewels), and to choose these items with just as much intention as what we eat”—YCL Jewels Creative Director, Fabienne 

The Numinous: How did Freyja become the muse for the collection—who is this ancienct goddess and what initially attracted you to her? 
Fabienne: Each collection is inspired in such different ways. Sometimes it will be a place, a feeling, or a person. In this instance, it was the name itself—Freyja. The name reflects great strength in women who are also able to trust in and embrace the feminine essence. 

Freyja represents a woman who is passionate, beautiful, and enjoys the finer things in life. This applies to our YCL women—they’re fierce, diverse, and passionate about life and the causes they support. They have an inner-strength, know who they are, what they stand for. This is real empowerment to me.

I feel like Freyja lives within all of us, just waiting to be activated. This collection caters to a woman whose days may be full and active, but who has a deep spiritual life that is meant to heard, trusted, and unleashed. 

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TN: When did you first feel a personal connection to her?
F: While I was taking a holiday in Japan and able to step away from the daily running of the business, I started thinking about the powerful and passionate women in my own life, and in particular my mother and her influence on me. The “Mother hoops” in the collection are an ode to similar hoops my Mum always wore when I was growing up.

But I guess you could say the connection to Freyja in concept and name was an amalgamation of all the wonderful, wise, and powerful women I know in my life. 

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YCL’s Mother Hoops

TN: So how do you think can women channel the Goddess Freyja in their day-to-day? 
F: Channeling the Goddess Freyja means prioritisizing time for ourselves, every single day. When we’re able to cultivate a peaceful and loving relationship with ourselves, so much abundance flows from this space.

It doesn’t matter what form this takes—it’s about sitting in a space of awareness, so that all areas of our lives have the room to flourish and bloom. This allows us to adapt, and to pivot quickly and with ease through all of life’s wonderful opportunities for transformation.

I practice this through non-negotiable morning meditation, and rituals that include drinking rose quartz-infused water for unconditional self love. I also spend time doing what the Japanese call “forest bathing”—which means taking long meditative walks that actively engage all five senses in the forest near where I live.

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Fête for Freyja

TN: What other powerful feminine idols are most inspiring to you?
F: Being a business woman is not something that comes naturally to me—I’m completely self-taught, and even four years in I’m learning to take charge in new ways and pushing the boundaries of my comfort zone.

In this effort, I’m inspired by all women who are following their vision with strength and conviction. Whodon’t just follow what they may have been taught, or a path society has led them to follow.

This could be the women I spend my day with, who I get to work with, the woman who serves me coffee with a smile, or a local woman creating art that’s completely unique to her own vision. I am also my own inspiration.

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Woman in the Sky Necklace for your heart chakra

TN: Why is jewelry such an important conduit to the mystical realm? 

F: I’ve been making jewelry since I was 13 years old but it wasn’t until I got older that I began to realise the jewelry I wore held a deeper meaning for me. At that time, however, I found it hard to find jewelry that was both intentional, but also modern in design. From this space of searching, YCL was born.

Everything we put into our body is literally the makeup of ourselves and our being. I believe it’s equally important to think about what we put on our physical body (clothing, jewels), and to choose these items with just as much intention as the food we eat.

Is there anything more magical than choosing to wear an intentionally designed and crafted treasure that sits right over your heart?

The Numinous collaborated with YCL Jewels to create this post. Discover more about their pantheon of mystically modern pieces HERE. 

WHAT’S YOUR ASTEROID GODDESS SIGN?

Want to harness your full feminine force through the stars? Activate some serious girl power with your asteroid goddess sign, says Rebecca Farrar. 

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With the Sun traveling through Virgo, the only female figure in the zodiac, it’s the perfect moment to harness the power of the zodiac’s feminine archetypes.

Just as modern women often face a limited expression of the feminine, traditional Western astrology often relegates us to either the mother (Moon) or lover (Venus).

Luckily, the four asteroid goddesses (Ceres, Vesta, Pallas, and Juno) open up a world beyond traditional roles of wife and mother, and lead us into a deeper exploration of our feminine complexity.

By diving into both the “positive” and challenging aspects of these placements in our charts, we can heal limiting dichotomies and make space for the re-emergence of a fuller expression of our feminine force …

Below, your guide to navigating and activating these placements in your chart. **New to your birthchart? Discover your asteroid signs by looking at your birth year and month HERE.

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:: CERES :: Roman Goddess of Agriculture, Grain, Fertility, and Mother-Daughter Relationships  
Ceres energy recognizes the paradox roles we inhabit as both our own parent and child. It also teaches us where we easily provide nurturance, love, and care to ourselves and others.

Illuminated Expressions: Self-parenting, nurturing self and others, acceptance of cycles of birth and death, caregiving

Shadow Expressions: Intense attachment to mother, projection of our unmet needs onto others, eating disorders

Placement by Sign: Unveils our deepest needs and reinforces our self-care priorities.

  • Ceres in Fire Signs: Nurturing and nourishment through movement (Aries), exploration (Sagittarius), and self-expression (Leo). *Make time for having mini-adventures, or celebrating your need for independence and dominance through traveling or starting your own side business.
  • Ceres in Earth Signs: Feels cared for with sensuality (Taurus), stability (Virgo), and commitment (Capricorn). *Connect with nature by taking a guided nature walk, learning more about the native plants or animals where you live, or spending time outside barefoot.
  • Ceres in Air Signs: Communication (Gemini), cooperation (Libra), and individuality (Aquarius) are places to foster nurturance. *Educate yourself on social justice and equality through taking classes or participating in activist groups, or explore art and design.
  • Ceres in Water Signs: Offer yourself and others nurturance by appreciating your need for feeling loved (Cancer), deep emotional bonding (Scorpio), or connection to spirit (Pisces). *Make time for seeing a therapist or being in groups where vulnerability and emotional expression is honored. Or volunteer your time doing something connects you to compassion for others.

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:: VESTA :: Roman Goddess of Hearth and Home  
The second largest asteroid reminds us of our devotion and how we can commit to a spiritual path and guard our inner sacred flame. It also indicates how our sexuality unfolds or develops with time.

Illuminated Expressions: Connecting to spirit through ritual, dedication to personal ceremonies or spiritual path, desire to bring magic into human experience, sacred sexuality

Shadow Expressions: Unrealized sexual potential, fear or denial of sexuality and passion, self-alienation

Placement by Sign: Reveals what we ritualize or desire to make sacred

  • Vesta in a Fire sign: Energy and drive becomes channeled through ambition (Aries), creativity (Leo), or idealism (Sagittarius). *With this placement, sexuality may become alienated through so much self-focus. Notice how you may use your sexual energy as self-fulfillment or to dominate others instead of sustaining supportive, ongoing relationships.
  • Vesta in Earth Signs: Comfort (Taurus), service to others (Virgo), and hard work (Capricorn) are the touchstones for focusing passion. *Explore practices such as Tantric sexuality that unite the sacred aspects of Vesta with the down-to-Earth qualities of connecting.
  • Vesta in Air Signs: Find ways to dedicate yourself to knowledge (Gemini), balance (Libra), and change (Aquarius). *In an air sign, Vesta craves ideas and shifting perspectives. Take classes on human sexuality or write out your own sexual biography as a way of noticing patterns in your own evolution and process.
  • Vesta in Water Signs: Devotion to ones’ feelings (Cancer), explorations of the taboo (Scorpio), or spiritual practice (Pisces) take on more importance. *The fiery nature of Vesta and the water sign placement soften the focus and call for sexual healing. Understand your energetic boundaries with sexuality and steer clear of spaces or situations where they may not be honored.

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:: PALLAS ATHENE (ATHENA) :: Greek Goddess of Wisdom, Craft, Poetry, and War 
Named after Athena, who honors the prophecy and oracle in us all, Pallas holds the key to our hidden genius.

Illuminated Expressions: Wisdom as integration of intuition and intellect, pattern recognition, strategic thinking, artistic expression

Shadow Expressions: Over identification with intellect, rejection of the inner feminine, black and white thinking

Placement by Sign: Shows us where we have intuitive gifts or creative intelligence.

  • Pallas in Fire Signs: Harness your unique genius by initiating (Aries), creating (Leo), or larger-than-life visioning (Sagittarius). *Try martial arts such as kung fu or t’ai chi, or fencing, to harness the innate warrior intelligence. Pallas in Leo and Sag may want to channel the fiery nature into creativity with arts and crafts, or take up chess where pattern recognition and playfulness meet.
  • Pallas in Earth Signs: Creative intelligence could be well suited for art (Taurus), woodworking (Virgo), or architecture (Capricorn). *Pallas here wants foundational or practical skills. Use a hands-on approach for finding a creative outlet that allows for your own clarity of touch and intentionality.
  • Pallas in Air Signs: Explore your gifts in debate or speech class (Gemini), mediation (Libra), or activism (Aquarius). *Pallas in air utilizes her keen sense of wisdom, perception, and the power of words. Become an advocate for change and the breath of fresh air it brings to your mind.
  • Pallas in Water Signs: Notice patterns of emotion (Cancer), intensity (Scorpio), or dream interpretation (Pisces) *Pallas’ intuitive gifts become more obvious here and perception turns towards the feeling realm. Use your skills in music, film, psychotherapy, or photography.

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:: JUNO :: Roman Goddess of Marriage and the Queen of the Gods
Juno presides over marriage and business partnerships, and often indicates the type of person we marry or find it easy to commit to. She helps us differentiate between being attracted to someone versus what is a good long-term fit for us.

Illuminated Expressions: Balanced partnership that honors both individual purpose and connection through commitment, equality, and loyalty

Shadow Expressions: Attachment patterns, power struggles and jealousy in relationships, fears and manipulation, controlling expressions of the feminine that detach us from personal needs and selfhood

Placement by Sign: Understanding what motivates us to be in partnership, and how we can create both togetherness and individuality

  • Juno in Fire Signs: Relationships with excitement that also involve independence (Aries), admiration (Leo), and unified vision (Sagittarius) are all main motivators for partnerships. Keep an eye on passion that leads too far into drama or becomes destructive. *Look for potential partners at the gym or places where you can expand your horizons.
  • Juno in Earth Signs: Keeps an eye out for stability in relationship and looks for physical security (Taurus), day-to-day support (Virgo), and dependability (Capricorn). *Ideal long-term partners could include people you meet at work, or in more traditional ways such as friends of friends, or even a matchmaker.
  • Juno in Air Signs: Seeks mental stimulation (Gemini), equality (Libra), or freedom (Aquarius) in partnership. Honor the air element by honing communication skills in relationships and staying open to something more non-traditional. *Locations for cosmic connections could include school or community events.
  • Juno in Water Signs: Juno appreciates nurturing (Cancer), intimate bonding (Scorpio), and spiritual connection (Pisces). Juno here may also be prone to not see things clearly, so keep away from manipulation, power struggles, or fantasy. *Karmic partnerships may form at church, through family friends, or even at intense bastions of sexuality like strip clubs!
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Rebecca, aka The Wild Witch of the West

Before becoming an astrologer more than seven years ago, “Wild Witch of the West” Rebecca Farrar was a huge skeptic. Now, she can’t imagine doing anything else! When not staring at her transits, she can be found wandering Ocean Beach, curled up with a good book, or “force” cuddling her kitty Freyja. For more cosmic musings, follow her on Instagram and Facebook. 

ADORNMENT AS SPIRITUAL PRACTICE: COMMUNING WITH JOY SMITH

Channeling the Divine through the decadently bejeweled, artist and mystic Joy Smith is raising the mystical-material vibration ever higher with her transformational talismans.

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Sculptress and seer Joy Smith believes that adornment is an intimate conversation—between the creator, the wearer, and the Divine.

Inspired by nature’s potent mysteries, and the light of Divine beauty that resides in every being, the artist’s ethically sourced, recycled gold pieces spark an emotional exchange between the the universe and each of us.

For Smith, connection to the Divine is always available, and through our talismans we can bring our personal conversation with the heavens all the way down to Earth.

With her newly-launched Light Sessions, Smith is raising the material-mystical vibration even higher. During these custom experiences, she uses song, meditative chants, and Reiki to channel a one-of-a-kind talisman that supports your distinctive transformation and growth.

Spirit is absolutely everywhere. Why not dress her in radiant gold?

(Hint: Start decking out your Divine with some inspo from Joy’s jewel-drenched Instagram feed!)

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Ruby Warrington: What are your own personal talismans?
Joy Smith: I wear pieces according to what I need—so I can beam my light out everywhere. I have different pieces that embody different feelings for me.

For example, I have a custom piece I made for myself that’s super special. In Milan, on a retreat with Deborah Hanekamp, we hiked to a pagan ritual place, where I found what looked like a piece of a ceramic vessel glinting in the grass. I could feel that it was infused with a spirit that wanted to help me with my healing work, and so I set it into a ring, which I wear when I’m creating pieces, and during my Light Sessions.

Even talking about it takes me back to that place. In the future, I’d like to go on pilgrimages to sacred sites to source similar pieces as part of my work.

 

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My Moon, My Light Necklace

RW: Your pieces have a strong spiritual essence. What’s your relationship to organized religion?
JS: The dogma of different religions can get messy, but the essence of spirit is what’s precious to me. I connect to the idea of the Holy Spirit, which I think of as our connection to the Divine—the spirit in us. My work is about activating that in others. I’m also super interested in world religions. I see the common thread and that’s fascinating to me. All the stories are the same, just different characters.

Having grown up Catholic, I still connect deeply to the iconography. I see the etchings in my designs as radiating light, and my goal is to elicit the idea of “heaven,” which I define simply as the place where great spirit lives … bliss.

 

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Guardian Rustic Shield Ring

RW: What do you see as the intersection between spirituality, craftsmanship, and art?
JS: I never thought I’d make jewelry. I knew I loved art history, and wanted to be a painter. I also connected to artists, as I felt they were connected to something spiritual with their work. I wanted that connection to come through in my work, too. I also love fashion because I see the spirit of the designer in it. It’s like art to me.

I fell into jewelry through the sculpture of making it. I initially wanted to be a fine painter, but didn’t think I was good enough and I couldn’t relay my message effectively at that time in that medium. Now, I express myself spiritually through my pieces as they relate to how I feel on the inside. I want them to be infused with feelings of beauty and light, and for this to be reflected in how I adorn myself on the outside.

I believe God, spirit, etc., created us as an expression of the beauty of the Divine. I make it a point to meditate and pray before I make my work. When we work in this way as creators, that’s spirituality to me.

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The artist at work

RW: What do the concepts of God and the Divine mean to you?  
JS: I believe God and the Divine are forms of the highest spirit, a spirit greater than ourselves that also lives within us and is part of us. That guides and protects us and loves us unconditionally. Neither are religious terms for me- I see them as a universal Spirit.

My own spiritual breakthrough came in my early twenties, when I had a very severe panic attack, and found myself debilitated by anxiety. My first teacher asked about my spiritual practice, and she gave me my first spiritual book, Marianne Williamson’s A Return to Prayer. I still read it every day. It helped me remember how to pray—how to connect to God—in a spiritual way.

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RW: “Light Language” is such a glorious phrase—tell us about learning to speak this language, and how clients experience it during your “Light Sessions.”  
JS: “Light Language” is how I describe my conversation with the divine, something that comes out in channeled melodies, or prayer. The term came to me via my guides during an Akashic records reading—and this really is how I feel about my conversations with God. The Light Language also comes through as automatic writing, which I carve into my talismans and artwork.

I came up with the Light Sessions since my work can be very solitary and I knew I wanted to connect with people on a deeper level. And my Light Language becomes vocal, as if I’m speaking in tongues, during one-to-one with my clients. I see it as the language of love, as expressed in my creations.

The Light Sessions are about channeling creations for transformation. We talk about stones and the style of the piece, and then my clients give me their intention and lay on my table, and I’ll either sing melodies of prayer or do Reiki and channel messages that come to me.

Afterwards, we create an intention candle together and they go home with their candle to pray / meditate with their intention in mind, and I go home and channel that energy while creating the piece for transformation. The plan is to also make this available to couples as a custom ring engagement ceremony.

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RW: Who is the “Communion Woman”? 
JS: Women who wear my jewelry have a strong sense of self. The common thread is that they have a connection to spirit, and that they’re all powerful in their own right. A lot of my clients have often been through a lot emotionally.

Having experienced challenges in their lives, they have been led to work on themselves spiritually, in order to connect more deeply to themselves and to the Divine. They’ve already found this connection, and want to explore more deeply what it means for their lives. A lot of their work is in service of the greater good. They have that depth.

Discover more about Communion by Joy’s sumptuously sacred jewels HERE, and book a custom Light Session with Smith in LA. 

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DREAMING ABOUT SEX WITH STRAIGHT DUDES … WHEN YOU’RE QUEER AF

She’s queer AF … so what are her dreams about having sex with straight men trying to tell Wolf Medicine Magic? Portraits: Sandra Hong

Wolf Medicine Magic queer af The Numinous Sandra Hong
Photo: Sandra Hong

It was around 2015 that the “man dreams” started. I don’t remember the details or the exact date, but basically for the past two years, and at this point on a weekly basis, I have had dreams about being attracted to, having sex with, seducing, pursuing and being good friends with straight men.

Probably not a big deal—except for the fact that I’m queer AF and haven’t slept with a straight man in years. More importantly, I’m not just a queer feminist. Calling myself a feminist seems like choosing Diet Coke. It’s kiddie stuff. Feminism light. It’s cute but it’s a label that cannot describe my deep, deep yearning to eradicate all traces of the patriarchy and toxic masculinity from this planet. If womyn’s separatist lands were more inclusive I’d sign-up in a minute.

For realz, my feminism is intersectional, queer, gender fluid, anti-racist, anti-apartheid, pro-trans, and realizes that all lives won’t matter until we are all free. This means that the patriarchy and our currently fucked up notions of who “owns” masculinity (hint: what if we are all free to be masculine/men at any time and on any given day?) needs to end.

I have also spent the past several years carefully carving out a life for myself that doesn’t involve *men. I absolutely love female energy, and being around those who are tapped into both female and male energy in a harmonious balance. To me, being in environments dominated by straight men feels like being wrapped in a wet blanket in sub zero temperatures. I become exhausted from having to deflect misogyny, sexual objectification, and struggling to be heard and seen.

The walk to the subway can be a battle against misogyny for most women, trans, and queer folks. So I’ve taken great care to at least make my work and social life free from gender oppression, and it feels amazing. None of my employers or co-workers are men. I don’t have any men as friends.

Occasionally I’ll have a man in one of my yoga classes but for the most part my world is queer and female. To me, my trans/gender fluid friends exude a harmonious energy that is devoid of toxic masculine energy. Meaning I’m never interrupted, talked over, or forced to take up less space.

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In fact, the gender scales of my adult life have tipped so far towards the feminine, I really don’t know what it’s like to be masculine or have exchange with masculine energy anymore. And I used to be totally fine with this—but I’m beginning to see the negative impact of this imbalance on my life.

This is most evident when it comes to asking for what I want from people (and mostly when it comes to my career and work related situations). I’m so used to tapping into a soft and gentle way of being, I am terrified of seeming too aggressive, too entitled to take up a lot of space, or of being too demanding—since I’ve learned to see these as negative traits.

But I’ve realized that what I want so badly for this world is for ALL PEOPLE TO BE SOFT AND GENTLE AND AGGRESSIVE AND DEMANDING WHENEVER THEY WANT. For these qualities not to be deemed “male” or “female.” I mean, right now I can hear a voice in my head saying: “stay in your lane. You must ask gently and with kindness and not too loudly. If you demand things from people and don’t consider how this demand affects them then you are a mean, privileged, entitled MAN. And you don’t want to be like that.” The struggle. Is. Real.

And did I mention that my own philosophy around gender is that it’s fluid AF, and something to be played and experimented with? To clarify, I love masculinity—just not when it’s being projected at me in the name of protecting some dude’s fragile ego.

I don’t hate men. I repeat, I don’t hate men. What I hate is that our society has told us that men have more privileges than women, and that masculinity needs to be protected at all costs (because it is fragile, and women/feminine power will destroy it). And I know not all men are exercising their privilege and exerting a toxic masculinity onto the world. Many men are great people, who want better for the world—but it is a FACT that all men benefit from and can use their privilege at any time. Sometimes it’s handed to them, whether they ask for it or not. Thus, the phrase “male privilege.”

At a young age, men are also taught all the masculine tools they need in order to be men—i.e. be powerful, aggressive, strong, commanding. Take what you want, take up a lot of space, talk as much as you’d like, make people listen to you. Your opinion matters most, you’re smart and clever (even if you aren’t), and women don’t matter as much.

This is changing, thank Goddess, because I see the up and coming generations fucking shit up and challenging all notions of sex and gender. So there is hope, but things are slow to change. Down here in 2017, we’re still in the thick of it.

Wolf Medicine Magic queer af The Numinous Sandra Hong
Photo: Sandra Hong

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My own gender representation is that of masculine sissy fag. I don’t wear dresses or skirts or shave my legs or underarms or any other body hair below my neck. I haven’t worn a pair of heels in who knows how long. On the surface one might think “oh there goes that soft butch.” But five minutes into knowing me you’ll clearly see a swishy, prissy teenage boy. Who wants to be a fabulous girl. Who wants to be a gay teenage boy.

I couldn’t be any farther from “butch.” I can’t even put together IKEA furniture, let alone chop wood, fix a leaky faucet, or start a fire. Or whatever else our society has deemed as “masculine.” I hate contact sports and could care less about watching them.

And yet my subconscious is evidently desperate for me to connect with my masculine side. Or as I like to think of it, my more aggressive, entitled, demanding, space-taking side. Why else am I dreaming about having sex with a dude? At the time of writing this, the dreams are happening at least three times a week.

So I have begun exploring ways to start integrating more masculine energy into my way of being. The first being to notice when I’m avoiding aggressive, demanding behavior—easiest to notice and correct when emailing and texting. Instead of “I’m just emailing to ask about my workshop proposal…” I correct myself and write: “When will my workshop proposal be processed?” To get right to the point. I’ve had a few opportunities to put this into practice in real time, too—and I find it to be so difficult. It just isn’t my natural way of being. But it IS helping me get what I want—and faster!

I’ve also tried to have more compassion and empathy towards straight, overtly masculine men. So, so difficult. I really do feel though, that evolving spiritually and getting where I want to be in life as I ease to the other side of 35, that this is a process I need to go through. I am receiving a very clear message from spirit to start being everything that I don’t like: meaning more aggressive, taking up more space, being demanding. But with compassion. These qualities aren’t always bad. In fact, less labels please; balance is the key.

I believe this is why the feminine IS rising. We. Are. Tired. Of. This. Shit. I’m ready for a gender fluid, queer, anything goes kind of world. It’s not girls to the front, or down with me. It’s folks to the front—and wave your gender representation freak flag high.

*For sake of space and to avoid repetition the use of the term man or men refers to cis-gendered, straight identified men. When referring to women I’m referring to cis-gendered and trans women unless otherwise noted.

HOLY F*CK: WHY SHIBARI BONDAGE IS THE ULTIMATE SURRENDER

In search of the deepest act of spiritual surrender, Alexandra Roxo gets bound and discovers boundlessness with the ancient art of Shibari bondage …

Alexandra Roxo Ruby Warrington The Numinous Victoria Hawkins Shibari Bondage Holy Fuck

Shibari (Japanese Rope Bondage) can be erotic, intimate, loving, sexy, quiet or raucous, meditative, artistic, insightful, transformative—all depending on the people engaged and how they both feel at the moment” – Victoria Blue

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I am always on the hunt to find ways to get free, to go wild, to let loose, and to go deeper into myself. Over the last 15 years, my search to explore the depths of my sexuality and spirituality has taken me everywhere from witch camp in the woods of Oregon, to working as a dancer in a truck stop strip club in New Mexico, to banging a drum at a Rainbow Gathering in West Virginia, to an orgasmic meditation circle where I had my clit stroked by an old Indian man … and SO many other places and practices.  

Drugs. Sex. Spirit. Art. It’s been a lifetime of exploration that started the first time my mom pulled Louise Hay off the bookshelf when I was 7, and the first time I kissed a boy, and girl, at 8 … 

So for an explorer of depths who hasn’t left many stones unturned, I am always seeking something new to try and am always ready with a big fat YES! 

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WOMEN TYING WOMEN 
My next yes fell straight into my lap after my dear friend Kyp Malone (who played the “urban shaman” in my web series “Be Here Nowish,” and whom I consider a Yoda of sorts), took me to a dinner party, introduced me to a woman in the corner named Victoria Blue, and said “You two should talk.”  

It all remained a mystery until months later. I was on the bus back home from 3 days of steeping and soaking in the magical Orr Hot Springs of Northern California and I suddenly thought to myself: I want to be tied up. This was especially random after spending 3 days in a tub reading a book about Jesus’ mystical life. But the words were clear and from my heart.

I’d been tied up by lovers before and engaged in a fair amount of BDSM in sex, but I knew there was something more here that I wanted and I began to investigate the ancient form of Japanese bondage called Shibari. Whereas other types of BDSM include performed dominance or submission, or the giving and receiving of pain as practice, Shibari is a fine art. Comparing a “50 Shades” rope scene with Shibari would be like comparing an IKEA rug with one from a Moroccan souk. 

Interestingly, when I googled “Shibari LA” and the first thing to pop up was a workshop called “Women Tying Women” with none other than Kyp’s friend Victoria as teacher! The next day, the magic continued when I walked into my 5Rhythms class and a cute woman ran up to me, handed me a card, and said  “Come to ‘Women Tying Women!’ My friend Victoria Blue is teaching!“ “She has one private session left. Do you want it?’ 

FULL. BODY. YES! 

Alexandra Roxo Ruby Warrington The Numinous Victoria Hawkins Shibari Bondage Holy Fuck
Victoria in a state of calm, suspended surrender

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GOING OFF LEASH 
So why did these words spring from my soul and why did I even want to be tied? Perhaps there is some past life witch healing there. But really, I think it’s because I crave deep surrender. And I crave deep catharsis.  And I long to become art as often as possible … 

How many places in your life can you TRULY surrender in? By surrender, I mean LOSE YOUR MIND. Let go of the reins. My friend Andi calls it “going off leash.” When you go “off leash” you slip into an altered state of ecstasy and sometimes agony and the mind goes quiet. Void.

Mind-blowing, expansive sex is a place one can find surrender. Meditation can be. Some good old fashioned tequila and a night of all night dancing with some MDMA licked from a tiny plastic bag in a Brooklyn bathroom worked in my late 20s. Plant medicine ceremonies too. Dance can be ecstatic and deep. But being tied up seemed like a depth of surrender and catharsis that my soul needed now.

Even though I’d been “off leash” many times, I was still nervous before going to see Victoria. Because not only was I going to be tied, I would also be suspended. Not like suspended from school—like suspended from the ceiling off a rope. Yes, this may conjure some morbid images of hanging corpses, but I thought of it like making myself into an ornate chandelier hanging as a centerpiece.

I told Victoria I wanted to be tied in a pose of expansion—heart opening, if possible. She quietly blindfolded me … 

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BOUND & BOUNDLESS 
I closed my eyes and Victoria began to play a German instrumental album that was integral to my sexual awakening in my early 20s. Out of all the music in the world she chose the goth band that the first person who ever tied me up used to play, and whom I had learned some of the most beautiful and fun things about sex at the age of 23. This moment of kismet softened my heart like butter, and as she tied me I felt myself starting to relax after being reminded of the divinity present.  

She bound me tight, hands up and open, back arched up, heart to the sky, one leg extended, and one folded. I let the ropes hold me. They were tight. Not soft and sweet. I began to turn into pliable flesh with no other option but letting go. I was like an infant. Helpless. Paralyzed almost. But the more and more I was tied, the more and more relaxed I felt. Like someone was caring for my soul.  

Then she hoisted me up and I lay back, being held only by this rope around my waist, floating in the air. The whole of my weight resting on one piece of rope. Completely bound. Angelic even. And that’s when the full surrender and deep catharsis began … 

Tears streamed down. Then they broke into deep, deep sobs from some place inside me that I had never met before. And moans of pain mixed with joy. Of release. Of heartache and heartbreak. I hung there. The pain escalated until the discomfort quieted the mind in the most nurturing way. The only thing possible to do was breathe.

I sobbed and breathed until I reached that edge that I have loved to flirt with for so many years. I whispered to her: “I’m at my limit” with tears streaming down my face and my chest. And then, ever so gently, Victoria pulled me down. She stroked my head and told me that I stayed up there a very long time and that I was very strong. As she pulled the ropes off me, my body felt lighter and freer than it had in ages. I felt my consciousness move into every cell. I could breathe into corners where breath hadn’t touched. I felt alive.

Alexandra Roxo Ruby Warrington The Numinous Victoria Hawkins Shibari Bondage Holy Fuck
Victoria and @sophiashibari

Discover more about Victoria’s private sessions and group classes HERE, and join she and I this October for a two day overnight retreat in Topanga that will bring together Shibari, Shadow Work, Storytelling, and Sexual Healing. If you’re interested in this deep work, add your name HERE and we’ll send out applications and full retreat info in a few weeks. 

HOLY F*CK: HOW HEARTBREAK CAN BE THE MOST POWERFUL MEDICINE

When Love is our teacher heartbreak can be the most powerful medicine, says Alexandra Roxo in her latest Holy F*ck column…

alexandra roxo holy fuck heart break open the numinous ruby warrington

So maybe just maybe some mega shit has been hitting the fan during this Venus Retrograde? Or perhaps it’s minor pieces of shit for you. Little annoying pieces of shit you thought were gone…but are still stinking up the place? Perhaps it’s around romantic love, rejection, partnership. Or perhaps self love, worth, value.

Chances are you’ve been stung. But guess what??! This means your heart is open—that it’s accessible, soft, tender, growing, reshaping, adapting, expanding. THIS IS A GOOD THING. Heartbreak can be the most powerful medicine.

Committing to living with an open heart it is not an easy road. It can mean letting your heart break and break and break, but each time it breaks it swells and becomes bigger and messier and wider and has the capacity to hold more.

This is the way of Love. (Cue Rumi.)

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CRUCIFIED BY LOVE  

Love has always been my personal teacher of choice. When I was 20 and all my friends had gurus, I was secretly writing the words “AHEM PREMA” (I am divine love) on my hand and telling folks, “Love is my guru!” I’ve been obsessed with Love for as long as I can remember. I’ve been in Love MANY times and rejected MANY times more, and still I keep on going for it.

How do I define Love?
Love is that which we were made from and that which we will return to. The primordial ooze in us. The ever present God-Goddess sparkle living in each cell. Which we feel when we”fall” in Love. Really what I believe happens is that this “falling” is us OPENING to the Love that already exists within us. What if you could feel that without an other person? This is what I’m talking about!!

And because I also never quit being curious and doing things that scare me, I signed up for a two-day intensive last week called “The Yoga of Intimacy” with Londin Angel Winters and Justin Patrick Pierce (who also may be the hottest couple on the planet. Major #RelationshipGoals.)

Arriving at a beautiful inn in Topanga I prepared myself to be “crucified by Love.” (My ideal Saturday!) Standing across from a man whose name I didn’t know, who wasn’t “my type,” I let Love show me where I was guarded. And I let it make me feel safe enough to pull down the walls and completely open to said stranger.

I looked into his eyes and cried. I shared my depths. And it felt as powerful as an Ayauasca ceremony. If not more powerful! With eyes open and locked onto someone else’s, instead of eyes closed solo-style like in plant journeys, I couldn’t escape my demons or pain or shut down or dissociate. Justin said it perfectly … “If you think ayahuasca is crazy, try love.”

I could literally NOT form a sentence afterwards. As a writer and wordsmith I was kinda freaked out by the temporary mush in my brain. But I was assured that this meant I had surrendered to the pure-as-hell-delicious Shakti/Divine Feminine energy that resides outside the mind.

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99 HEARTBREAKS & I DON’T WANT TO SOLVE THEM

At the workshop, I also had to go on a practice dinner date with an older doctor from Beverly Hills who talked like I imagine Freud would have sounded. I did NOT wanna get vulnerable with him but I did, and I broke into tears across the dinner table as I revealed to him my deepest desires. He was beyond grateful that I showed him my Heart.

As I cried and told him of all the times I had broken my heart, he said “At the end of your life would you rather have loved and had your heart broken 99 times and on the 100th found someone special, than hidden your heart and not loved at all?” It was true. And all 99 times of heartbreak are heart opening and “special” in my book.

Two days at this intensive rocked me to my core. It was SO terrifying to let go and let Love do its thing. Yet I felt more delicious than I had in ages.

alexandra roxo holy fuck heart break open ruby warrington the numinous

SO HOW CAN YOU WORK WITH LOVE’S MEDICINE? 

When Love becomes a skill and a medicine, you can hang out with a close friend and feel deeply nourished and fed when you leave them, like you just got 10 hugs and a bowl of soup from your Grandma.

Or you and your Lover can be in a constant state of divine communion, and one glance feels like 1,000 gourmet raw chocolates for your soul.

A solo Love practice means at a stop light in the car you can feel the depths of Love swimming through your body and yoni, and you have the power to release a warm honey glow throughout your body that feels like you are cumming. Try walking into a meeting from that place!

Here’s how to start … 

– Love and be loved. Identify the 5 ways you feel most Love(d). I do this with all my clients. Perhaps it’s petting your cat. Or watching your fave film. Meditating. Chanting to Goddess. Get to know the direct path to your Heart, if you don’t already, and start feeling the Love vibes often by using those tools.

– Connect to humans/animals. The internet doesn’t count unless you are one-on-one on Skype with someone. IRL is the best way to go. Make this a priority. It is the remedy against overeating, loneliness, indulging in bad habits, overworking … I’m talking real connection! Even one solid hug and “Good Morning” from a roomie is something.

– Let your heart get naked. This is where you get vulnerable. If you can practice this daily, you’ll either deepen your already existing partnerships or tenderize the nest of your heart to get it ready to let love in. Call a new friend and share something intimate. Write a poem and share it online. Ask someone for help. Practice vulnerability and practice receiving some Love. (Like let the guy at Trader Joe’s help you to your car already!)

– Feel, feel, feel. Sounds obvious, right? But how often do you feel your feelings in the moment? Practice vocalizing your pain. Frustration. Sadness. As you’re experiencing it. Let yourself feel the depths of your yearning/your rage/your sadness/your joy DAILY.

– Daydream. Do a little bit of daydreaming each day. Imagine your lover caressing your neck. Imagine your lover giving you that “I wanna fuck you” look across the room at a crowded party. If this sounds cheesy to you then work on the vulnerability of your heart.

Whether you are in partnership or flying solo, you can play with Love every day. You can become more and more conscious of living in your full beauty and radiance and sexiness the more and more you release the fear of getting hurt. You can just open. The pain becomes part of your practice too and, trust me, you even start to love that! WHAAA?!!! Can it be?!!! Yeeeep.

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Londin & Justin’s next intensive is September 16-17th, and I’ll def be there crying and loving and embodying all the Shakti I can, Goddess willing. You can discover more about them and their work Londinangelwinters.com

HOLY F*CK: RECLAIM YOUR SEXUAL POWER & HELP HEAL THE WORLD

Reclaiming your sexual power and potential is part of the collective awakening happening now. And it’s never too late, says Alexandra RoxoPortraits: Alexandra Herstik

alexandra Roxo holy Fuck The Numinous sexual power

I’ve taken a few months off from really diving into topics of sex, eroticism, and partnership here in my column. Why? I must admit, I’ve been distracted by politics and found myself thinking: “How can I dare talk about sex, as the world is seemingly in dire need of discourse about so many other things?!”

Well, as my passion for sharing about love and sex wandered around my brain like a disenfranchised child with no home, who else but Sigmund Freud swooped in to validate it—and shove it back into the world!

Freud said that sexual repression is the chief psychological problem of humankind, and the root of many crimes, illness, war and woe. As if I need a dead white man to remind me of something I already knew! But I did. Touché Dr Freud, touché.

And his theory reminded me that it’s okay to continue sharing about love, sex and partnerships—even in a time when ICE raids are being done to innocent people, families are being separated and deported, and the whole structure of a country that felt like it was moving towards progress is being threatened.

Because this includes LOVE and SEX.

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THE SEXUAL LANDSCAPE YOU WERE BORN INTO

Let’s take a very brief tour of history. Some say that we once lived in a “partnership” society, where people co-existed in some states of harmony. This shifted into a “dominator” society. Have you seen the movie or read the book “Mists of Avalon?” In the book there is a battle between the “old” religion—a religion honoring nature, The Goddess, the many faces of the Divine—and the “new” religion, a religion honoring ONE man.

Pantheistic to monotheistic. This shift changed everything for humanity. When the Goddess religion/pantheistic religions went out, so did our connection to nature, to ecstatic states, to sex, to the Feminine. By denying sex we denied nature! As Terrence McKenna said in his book Food of the Gods: “The dark night of the soul for planet Earth began.”

The “Wild Woman” (seen as a reflection of nature herself) was then sought to be tamed. We saw the literal possession of women. Burning of witches. Corsets. Chastity belts. Women’s rights being taken away in many many cultures. The polarization of “the virgin” and “the whore.” And this, my dears, is what YOU were born into.

Fair enough, in this country we got it about the LEAST bad—we are able to vote, get an abortion, wear what we want. BUT this also created a dichotomy that can be VERY confusing.

You were told you can speak up and be you. But you must also be sweet and pretty and skinny. You were told it was slutty to enjoy lots of sex. But you were told also “Claim your sexuality!” You were told you could wear what you want. But when you wore it you were treated differently. At least when it was scandalous to show an ankle it was very clear. ANKLE = SLUT. Now the dial is all over the place.

If you were born into any religion that is monotheistic and patriarchal then whether you want to accept it or not, you probs have internalized all kinds of sexual repression with a side of shame, and a dash of guilt on top. (If you somehow escaped all this then…GODDESS BLESS!)

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SO, HOW THE HELL DO WE MOVE BEYOND THIS?

It’s going to take a lot more work. See my piece from last year about “Sexual Healing” for a refresh and jump start.

The biggest thing we can do is keep QUESTIONING. Everything. In sex. Redefining our experiences as our own. Making our own rules. Reclaiming what is our human right.

FOR EXAMPLE. Perhaps by society’s standards it’s not acceptable to sob uncontrollably during sex. HOWEVER, the energy of sex is MAD powerful, and when used to it’s full conscious potential can be a shamanic experience. So, if you are having conscious deep deep sex, and start releasing trauma or shame or guilt from your body you will probably sob. This can cause more shame because we’ve been taught that’s not okay.

My first girlfriend was a shamanic mover of energy and she knew it. The orgasms I had with her moved massive amounts of shame I had internalized growing up in the Christian south, out of my body. She held space for me. Made me feel safe enough to completely release into my body and use the energy of sex for deep healing. Sometimes that meant opening further and further when I thought I couldn’t anymore, but she helped me keep going, much like in a plant medicine ceremony, or even running a marathon. The altered state that one enters during sex can be a place where so much work can take place.

So how do you allow yourself to let go enough to work with the energy of sex, or even love or partnership, for healing and ecstasy?

alexandra Roxo holy Fuck The Numinous sexual power

HOW TO LITERALLY RECLAIM YOUR SEXUAL POWER

Create a conscious container. By container I mean a defined space. Whether you are coming together just for sex or also for a certain amount of time weekly for sexual exploration define the rules, the terms. How long? What do we do if someone wants to scream or cry?

Communication! If you want to have a soul sob with a deep cervical orgasm you have to make sure your partner can “hold” you through it. Instead of saying, “Hey babe. What’s wrong? Don’t cry,” educate them to hold the space for you, and say instead: “I’m here. Let it out. Stay with it. I love you.”

When you release some of the pain in your body that’s hidden deep within your cervix or womb of COURSE there will be tears, shouting, laughing—ALL OF IT! But you will feel so much lighter and freer afterwards if you let those emotions come out and you don’t hold them in. Not worrying about what you may look like or sound like. Instead, being like a raging river, embodying Kali, embodying Venus, the rivers of Oshun, the energy of a storm, the energy of the ocean. She is never ashamed for her moods and needs. She just IS.

If you look at sex as expansion beyond the “get in and get off” vibe we’ve been taught by movies and TV our whole lives, you will see it has massive healing potential to clear through chakras and move blocks—while increasing your radiance and attraction levels in a major way! It’s a super power and that’s why it has been repressed and controlled for so long.

If you think back to how you “learned” sex it was probably mostly through media. Women “sound” like this or that. They make these faces during sex. They lay on the bed in this or that way. What if that was all learned behavior and in order to reclaim your full sexual potential you get to go on the journey of FINDING OUT what your natural sexual state is?

What faces you make. What sounds. Maybe you sing when you cum! Or make low guttural grunts. Maybe you sob uncontrollably for A YEAR as you release shame from your body. Does that mean something is wrong with you? NO. HELL NO. Maybe you find your fantasy and realize you like to be flogged or spanked. Does that mean something is wrong with you? NOPE.

It’s a choice. You make the choice to embody Bridget Jones. Or Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. Or Carrie in Sex and the City. Or…Venus emerging from the ocean. Kali emerging from a fire. Persephone diving into the Underworld and coming back renewed. You choose.

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RE-WRITE THE SEX SCRIPT

Here are some practical ways to begin to rewrite some of your sexual programming…

– Be Curious! Read books. Listen to podcasts. Don’t be ashamed if you want to learn about polyamory. Or multiple orgasms. Or whatever the hell you’re into. Nothing is too strange. Nothing is too weird. As you begin to delve, protect your little seed of curiosity before sharing with everyone. You don’t need anyone’s opinions about your desire to learn about 1950’s Occult Sex Parties or prostate massage. It’s your exploration. Keep it sacred.

– Look at your demons. Your shadows. Your shames. Have you engaged in healing around your sexual history? Chances are your first sexual experiences were rather “unconscious,” maybe with alcohol attached and not centered around heart opening and connecting. And if not, well, kudos to you! (Mine were pretty dope with candles and a fountain and fairy lights and soft music and eye gazing even when I was a preteen cause I was #BornThisWay. But then I’ve also had about 100 that were NOT like that at all…) If you feel you have work to do around love and sex then start journaling about your programming, stories, traumas. Engage in conversations. Do the healing work with a coach or in a group.

– Create the space to explore. If you’re in partnership then consciously communicate with your partner about wanting to make the sex more conscious and expansive, and work to bust through some of the cultural norms together. Perhaps this means engaging in some connecting work before sex. Eye gazing. Doing some tantric breath. Giving each other space to hear fantasies without judgement. That means if your lover says “I’m turned on by watching horses fuck” you have to listen and hold space for that and not be like “EW!” immediately. Trust is very important when opening in this way. If you’re solo then start getting in there and doing your own exploration work with your self. Learn your fantasies. What feels good and what doesn’t.

– Be aware of your words. Stories you perpetuate with your words which can cast magical spells. Sometimes I catch myself talking like Samantha from SATC and I stop myself. Some of that languaging and programming is NOT conscious at all. Sure, it’s fun, but it’s creating a reality that I picked up from TV. Not my own heart.

– Question everything. This can be fun! “Do I actually like to wax my puss? Or do I do it cause someone told me to?” Hmm well for me honestly I think it’s the later. “Do I actually like lingerie and Agent Provocateur?” Resounding YES for me on that one! “Where is my sexuality at on the Kinsey scale?”

– Talk to your friends. THIS IS HARD. One time when I brought up the transcendental power of fisting to catapult you into an altered state in a car of women there was RADIO SILENCE. It was awkward. But without discussion things continue to be taboo Unspeakable. Hidden away in dark corners. So moving past that awkward silence with some laughter and humility is enough to open the floodgates. Before you know it someone will be sharing how they once used a cucumber as a dildo and you won’t feel alone.

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If you want to work with a group on this, I’m doing a monthly HOLY F*CK workshop starting on the New Moon of 2.26!  This is a little different than the salon I did last year as this is deeper work, and enough to keep you busy exploring and reprogramming and rewiring your sex energy until the next month’s workshop! Sign up HERE. And as always I do one on one mentorships and coaching sessions which you can book HERE.

THE MANY FACES OF THE FEMININE

The Earth needs empowered feminine energy like never before in 2017. How will you connect to the many faces of the feminine essence?

faces of the Feminine sarah durham wilson jessica sevapreet hesser The Numinous

 

2016 was a wildly challenging ride through womanhood. As we enter the New Year, we sat down with Sarah Durham Wilson and Jessica Sevapreet Hesser to explore how you can activate all of the faces of your feminine in 2017—from awakening your creative force to making friends with death.

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DECIDE HOW YOU WANT TO SHOW UP AS A WOMAN IN THE WORLD

To show up as a woman in the world, you have to understand that first and foremost you are WOMAN. Imagine what it would be like to feel worthy, beautiful, loved, and important without needing to change or maintain anything. What if no matter what you did, no matter how you looked, no matter what happened to you, you understood that these essential things were always yours?

Activation: Grace of God Meditation

Mantra: Bhand Jammee-ai

Crystals: Chrysocolla, Ruby, Larimar, Rose Quartz

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FIND YOUR GODDESS

I didn’t really find the Goddess, she found me. Many years ago I had an experience of my god dying. It really came out of the blue, and this idea of a Christian male godhead started to disintegrate within me. At first I really grieved this loss, but then things started to move in a different way—Jessica

Activation: Finding the goddess is really just about connecting with the parts of you that feel beautiful and graceful. A perfect way to do this is through dancing. Put on music and just let it move you. Raise the vibration even higher by wearing something silky or adorning yourself with jewelry. Start with this Goddess Playlist.

Mantra: Adi Shakti

Crystals: Moonstone, Mother of Pearl, Sapphire

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MAKE FRIENDS WITH DEATH

Women hold the death energy because we are always changing, like the Moon and like the seasons. When we remove ourselves from death and darkness it leaves us very incomplete and disempowered. In working with the Faces of Feminine we can come back into integrity with the beautiful wholeness, which is our birthright and the source of our power—Jessica

Making friends with death is about inviting back all the parts of ourselves we have exiled. It’s an invitation back into integrity and into wholeness. Explorations into this dark space can start by just allowing yourself to really be in the unknown.

Activation: Sit in silent meditation, unmoving, with your eyes closed for 20 minutes per day. See what comes up with curiosity, rather than fear.

Mantra: Kal Akal

Crystals: Black Tourmaline, Obsidian, Black Fluorite

Sarah Durham Wilson, Jessica Sevapreet Husser, Faces of the Feminine, Faces of the Feminine Course, DOITGIRL
Sarah Durham Wilson

DISCOVER THE “FOUR NIGHTS”

Once a woman understands the cycles of the earth and phases of the Moon, she can understand herself better. She doesn’t feel so alone because she is one with the Mother, which is where we feel best; it’s where we feel most natural, most feminine, most alive, most nurtured, abundant, and empowered—Sarah

Activations:

Dark of the Moon—Let yourself be emptied. Have a day of silence. Turn off your phone, computer, and TV and just experience being only with yourself, alone and quiet.

Waxing Moon—Make a list of all the new things you want to do for the next year and then go do one! Go on an adventure. Explore. Listen to music that enlivens your spirit.

Full Moon—Get creative. Paint, draw, or cook a fabulous meal.

Waning Moon—Self care. Take a bath. Get a massage. Do some slow yoga. Let yourself eat in a way that really feels nourishing.

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ALIGN WITH YOUR FEMININE AND MASCULINE ENERGIES

When I reside in the unhealthy masculine, I’m chasing, not receiving. I’m pushy, rushed, and faithless. When I lose touch with feminine energy, I lose touch with the best parts of myself. Re-finding the balance between the two serves not just me but everyone around —Sarah

We all have feminine and masculine energy. The key is to know when each is useful. Masculine energy is essential in order to manifest your creativity and turn your feminine force into action and form. But too much masculinity can show up as disconnection, rigidity, aggression, or irritation. Too much femininity arises through overly-emotional reactions, indecisiveness, confusion, or an inability to take action. If you’re experiencing either of these, it’s time to call your neglected side back to the table.

FEMININE ACTIVATION: Try reading or writing poetry, dancing, or singing. Focus on receiving. Do a few minutes of left nostril breathing.

Mantra: Adi Shakti

Crystals: Moonstone, Pearl, Rose Quartz

MASCULINE ACTIVATION: Get physical — go for a run, take a kickboxing class or do a few minutes of Sat Kriya or right nostril breathing.

Mantra: Har

Crystals: Black Lava or Tiger’s Eye

***

TRANSITION FROM MAIDEN TO MOTHER

Woman is always the creative essence, whether through giving birth to children, ideas, businesses, art, words, or any other form you put into the world. The Maiden energy is full of vitality and energy. But when we stay there too long, the opposite actually happens: we are drained of our energy and we are stripped of our power. The Maiden doesn’t quite yet know what being woman is, but the Mother embodies it completely—Jessica

MAIDEN ACTIVATION: The gift of the maiden is innocence. If you feel a loss of vitality in life or are lacking passion and enthusiasm, you may need to connect to your maiden energy. Engage in something new—go on a road trip, check out a class you’ve always wanted to take, have an adventure day.

Mantra: Ardas Bahee

Crystals: Aura Quartz, Citrine, Spirit Quartz

MOTHER ACTIVATION: The gift of the mother is grace. If you find yourself really concerned with what other people think of you or are wrapped up in appearances, you could do with a good dose of Mother energy. Connect with Mother Earth. Go outside, walk barefoot, lay in the grass, pick wildflowers. Try the Maaa Meditation.

Mantra: Beautiful, Bountiful and Blissful

Crystals: Mother of Pearl, Celestine, Aquamarine

Jessica Sevapreet Hesser, Sarah Durham Wilson, Faces of the Feminine, Faces of the Feminine Course, Mantras + Miracles, Mantras and Miracles
Jessica Sevapreet Hesser

WORK WITH OTHER WOMEN

I know that the Goddess is the missing piece in so many women living in a patriarchal culture—these are tools I wish my mother had had, the self love and intuition and feminine alignment of cycles and seasons in our lives. When I had a feminine awakening, it literally saved my life and I wanted to share the gifts I’d been shown with every woman I possibly could. I didn’t just want to, it felt like a mission that Goddess had handed me—Sarah

The first step to working with other women is to be willing to get over yourself! Allow yourself to really enjoy the things that other women bring to the table without needing to compete or compare. Every woman has her own gifts and when we join forces our power is exponential.

Activation: Explore lunar wisdom by joining the Moon Club or The Faces of the Feminine.

Mantra: Me Within Me is the Purity. Me Within Me is the Reality. Me Within Me is the Grace. I Am the Master of the Space.

Crystals: Blue Lace Agate, Blue Chalcedony, Turquoise

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BECOME A SACRED ACTIVIST

2017 will be the year of the woman. There is a huge awakening in response to a call felt deep in the heart of every woman, a call put out by a planet which is suffering. Women are rising up, ready to be sacred activists, ready to be protectors of the earth and its people, ready to be the saviors we have been waiting for—Jessica

Becoming a sacred activist means first coming into integrity and alignment with your own values. Take a look at the things you find yourself impassioned about. How much energy do you use that you don’t need to? What do you “make war on,”attack, or hate in your own life or in yourself? Where do you sell yourself as a woman—where do you abdicate your power? After you dig into questions like these, the work you can offer the world shows up really clearly.

Activation: Find an activist group near you or online. Practice the Meditation to Invoke Your Inner Light.

Mantra: Magnificent Mantra

Crystals: Vanadinite, Jasper, Carnelian, Pyrite, Amazonite

 

Join Sarah Durham Wilson of DOTIGIRL and Jessica Sevapreet Hesser for FACES OF THE FEMININE, a four-weeks online women’s study course, with guidance, virtual circles, rituals and Kundalini Yoga starting January 8th. Find out more and register here.