MY MYSTICAL LIFE: FLORAL TAPPING, PAN THE MOVIE

On mainlining my flower essences, and why you have to see Pan the movie…

I experienced Floral Tapping. I’ve made no secret of how much I like to work with flower remedies. I’ve found them to deliver exactly the kind of gentle support and subtle shifts my system really seems to vibe with – especially during weeks like this! Seriously, the number of texts I’ve had from my Numi crew like; “WFT is going on, I feel very very strange right now, a combo of crazy excitement and totally can’t be a**ed.” Also, everyone is late for their period.

Well 1) Mercury Retro and 2) the freaking Aries Super Full Moon Ascention Wave! So let’s just hang on in there.

But back to the flowers, and thanks to my lovely friend Valerie Oula who taught me a new way to use them this week. Flower essences play a central role in her Luminous Shift series, a five-part workshop in which she creates a custom blend for each participant based on their intention for the month, combined with kundalini meditations and EFT to amplify their effects.

Cut to my favorite part. You usually take flower essences using a dropper directly into your mouth, but half way through Tuesday night’s class Valerie had us soak a tiny piece of tissue in our essences, ball it up, and then stuff it into our belly button! We then did a modified Body Talk tapping practice (by the way, the girl in this video is also AWESOME) to help activate them, followed by an 11-minute kundalini meditation to Expand the Physical Body.

Woah. 1) During the meditation, my mind played me two little movies of a certain situation I’d been feeling kinda paranoid about – one showing things as I was seeing them, the other just how easily I could see the same situation from a completely empowered and loving perspective. Pure gold! And 2) Totally. Blissed. Out. All the way home.

Yes, I will be mainlining the flowers this way again. Valerie’s next Luminous Shift series will take place over five consecutive Mondays 11/02. For more details email: [email protected]

I’m making Peter Pan my new power animal. Sometimes Hollywood gets it so right, Joe Wright’s new Peter Pan movie being a total case in point. I’d pretty much forgotten (or never really connected in the first place with) the downright Numinosity of the Peter Pan story – orphan child gets kidnapped by pirates to mine for magical fairy dust; escapes and discovers he can fly, but only once he “believes” he is part-fairy himself; in doing so, rediscovers his superpowers, overthrows the pirates, safeguards the magical Fairy Realm, and connects to his long-lost family / tribe.

If the underlying message to believe in your superpowers and the notion of a “fairy uprising” alone aren’t enough to convince you to go check out Pan the movie this weekend, here are five more cosmic reasons to see it:

The set-up. The story begins with Peter finding a letter from his long-lost mother in his “file” in the “records office” of his orphanage. Cue brilliant visual reference to the Akashic Records, in case you were struggling.

The psychedelic rainforest scenes. Seriously, the cinematographer has got to have been dabbling with some Amazonian plant meds…

The costumes. The wardrobe crew were most definitely checking out the Instagram account for the Spirit Weavers gathering when designing outfits for the tribe guarding the Fairy Realm.

The mermaids. Played by Cara Delevigne.

The crystal cave / fairy hive. Since the film is also in 3D, the final scenes are as close as you’re likely to get to fulfilling your fantasy of hanging out in an actual crystal cave, built by actual fairies, without having to take any Amazonian plant meds.

TURNED ON: ME AND MORGAN LE FAY

Who was Morgan Le Fay? Ellie Burrows gets up close and personal with an everyday Goddess. Portrait: Mikal Marie Evans

Ellie Burrows shot by Mikal Marie Evans

Morgan Le Fay is sweating me.

I recently bought a The Goddess Oracle Deck & Book Set, and I’ve gotten into the habit of pulling a card each morning. And the strangest thing has been happening.

No matter how much I shuffle, I get Morgan. And the last time a friend was over, she showed up for her, too. The Goddess obviously has something to tell me.

I didn’t really know much about Morgan Le Fay, except that references to her can be found throughout the Arthurian legends, that she’s supposedly a fairy (neé fay), and the main character in a book called The Mists of Avalon that’s been sitting on my shelf, unread, for no less than five years.

In July, prior to her recurring role in my morning routine, I went to Glastonbury, her home turf. I put my feet in the Chalice Well and Gardens, and did not hear her siren song. I felt zero connection to her. I always thought Kali, Kwan Yin, and Artemis are more my jam anyway.

According to my deck, Morgan Le Fay is there to help us honor our own rhythms and show us that we are the master and mistress of our own clock when it comes to eating, sleeping, exercising, and making love. Since my routine is pretty on point (what up, black tea, Body By Simone, 8+ hours of sleep per night), it felt like this was about something else entirely. So I decided to do some digging. And that’s when I began to hear Morgan’s song.

In books, Morgan Le Fay is a healer, a heroine, a seductress, or sorceress. Her realm of expertise lies beyond the concrete (unlike my beloveds, listed above). Morgan is a bit harder to pin down, and often considered controversial. Her influence is consistently twisted and turned in service of a story.

So it looks like Morgan and I do have some things in common; my essence too can be twisted and turned in service of stories.

Observe:

Ellie the Healer: In 2008, Ellie was diagnosed with a permanent pain condition in her lady parts. Through ecstatic breathwork, deep relaxation, emotional exploration, copious amounts of sleep, a cleaner diet, and routine exercise, she healed herself and now is fully functioning down there and everywhere.

Ellie the Heroine: An average student at an intense high school, Ellie decided to get her shit together and ended up graduating magna cum laude from Northwestern University. She had a moderately successful career in the film business, before heading off into the sunset to explore the world as a spiritual tourist and pursue her dream career as a writer. She often uses the monomyth aka the hero’s journey in her personal essays, in service of helping herself, and others, evolve.

Ellie the Seductress: Ellie often uses her words and body to attract and send messages. She is warm-hearted and vulgar-mouthed. She likes putting pictures of herself online that show off her body by Simone. She’s uses extreme amounts of eye contact and takes an inordinate amount of pleasure in distracting people from their work in favor of more hedonistic pursuits.

Ellie the Sorceress: Ellie believes anyone can talk to the Universe and that it will talk back. She often makes decisions based on astrology, and consults psychics, tarot card readers, and mediums when necessary. She relies heavily on her intuition and ardently believes in the existence of the soul. She claims to have had visions of things before they happened. Kind of like Malcolm Butler in the Super Bowl.

In addition to the above, I can also identify with the loving sister, nagging girlfriend, super-down hook up, naïve millennial, fearless adventurer, or reclusive homebody. For as long as I can remember, I have tried to define my person using personas, casting myself as characters in various stories as a means of figuring myself out. Humanity is really hard to make sense of, and that’s why we’re busy telling so many stories in the first place. And we all know where stories are generated: solely in the mind.

That thing in our chest – it’s a place of confusion. The heart knows no classification, no characters, no story. It knows nothing – but it feels everything. That’s why someone who “follows his/her heart” is someone who we would call “free.” Free from the judgment, free from stories.

I think Morgan wasn’t a Goddess at all. I think she was an actual human being, and that’s why she’s hard to identify with and her role and influence greatly debated. Morgan will never be just one thing. Neither will I. And so I choose to see her as a real woman, suspended between mind and heart, trying to make it work in Medieval Times. I can so relate; bubonic plagues and lack of electricity aside, Millennial Times has its challenges, too.

Okay Morgan, message received. Drop the stories. Drop the personas. My everyday Goddess deck just wants me to be an everyday woman. An everyday human.

Nota Bene:
For more on archetypes see Katy Perry’s Elle cover story.
For more on “real” women: See Maggie Gyllenhaal’s acceptance speech at this year’s Golden Globes.

DARK FAIRY DELIRIUM: WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE A GEMINI

We’ve just experienced a powerful New Moon in multi-faceted Gemini, gifting us an opportunity to embrace the quicksilver side of ourselves. Nadia Noir gives an insight into a life spent searching for “the other me.” Images: Bela Borsodi for Document Journal.


When I was 10-years-old, my mother took me to a bulk retail store full of tiny sausages, discounted toilet paper, seven kinds of hummus before that was a thing, and kitschy forms of entertainment. It was coming up on my birthday so she told me I could buy two things. Anything I wanted. I went for a box set of every Disney song ever recorded and a giant astrology book with hundreds of pages of words, pictures of animals, gemstones, and a diagram for drawing out your natal chart.

I remember turning to the pages that talked about Gemini and seeing birds and monkeys inked across the pages, “yellow” being a prominent theme color, and descriptive words like “superficial,” “mercurial,” “intellectual” and “social butterfly” describing the tiny little Gemini creature that was me. I took the book home and with compass in hand, painstakingly drew out my chart. Eventually, months later, I thought I had solved the puzzle that was me. I was done. Everything about me was illuminated. Or, so I thought.

From that point forward, I told people that I was not a Gemini. There were other parts of my chart that described me and I was not, I was never a Gemini. I was something else entirely. An astrological amalgamation of all the other things in my chart. I was the diplomatic, regal drama of my Leo Rising. I was the lurid, panty-scorching nymphomania of my Scorpio moon. I was the warm campfire-scented sensuality of my Venus in Taurus which was also my Midheaven which was also in my tenth house and one time an astrologer I met at 3am in a coffee shop said I am basically ruled by Venus, which means I was definitely not a Gemini.

Geminis were bubbly. They talked a lot. They didn’t feel. That was the main reason I decided I wasn’t a Gemini. I had feelings. Massive ones that swung me up into the air like a father tossing his child into a sun-drenched sky only to forget to catch the child. I was a broken fairy, wings crushed against the pavement.

And for years I walked in this haze of what I perceived as Scorpionic darkness, sometimes washed over with emotions so cruel and body-crushing that the manic-pixie-dream-girl that was my Gemini side couldn’t survive. She would either choke on saltwater tears, sleeping in bathtubs and reading Victorian erotica, or she would rebel by taking my Moon out dancing in full-on drunken nymphette revelry, a sheen of lascivious Gemini glee captured mischievously through the stoic mask of my Leo features.

I called her the “Party Slut.” She would die the next day in a wave of pity or guilt or hungover misunderstanding. Her glitter, scattered across the floor in impossible rainbows, would be swept up into a tiny bottle with a stopper that was to be cracked open for “emergencies only.”

The emergency came half-way through my Saturn Return. I was red wine drunk at my friend’s clothing store. We were listening to Mariah Carey and in our perpetual, drunken Thelma and Louise-ish state, I was finally understanding what love might mean and I knew one day I wanted to find real love and instead of just flailing and weeping naked in a series of hot and cold baths that lasted for hours like I would usually do, my supposedly Scorpionic shell cracked. What I uncovered was a changeling, a creature so fierce and fluid that only the power of the wind (which I’ve always adored) could whip the edges into place after a few nights of unashamed shape-shifting. What I uncovered (or stopped negating, rather) was my Gemini.

That pendulum swing of moods? That was pure Gemini. Dancing around the Maypole. Dry humping the Maypole. Turning the Maypole into a stripper pole. And then, when the Maypole stopped being amusing, smashing and burning the Maypole into a sacred effigy of youth lost. The lack of the supposedly quintessential Gemini charm? That was my Gemini side analyzing, surveying, prospecting, dissecting, and poking at people. Pinching their souls until they were bruised and raw. I was writing an eternal, internal book on everyone’s every movement until I could find the two sides to them. I wanted everyone to have two sides. I wanted to see in them what I could not find in myself. It was then they became whole.

All that time that I was denying my Gemininess, I was being a classic Gemini. Trying to find another piece to make me feel complete, to solve the riddle, to cease the shifting, from light to dark and back again. Every time I switched my style from ’60s girl group to ’50s beatnik to sequin-crazy glam rock goddess to paisley goth to raw vegan yoga girl, that was me trying to find my other half. Every time I took a shot of Patron or a shot of wheatgrass or burned sage or burned bridges, that was me trying to understand the other me.

My Gemini search engine was constantly spiritually downloading all the information ever over the yin-yang network of life. And, I am not alone in this. Gemini Stevie Nicks may be the White Witch, but she twirls around in black fringe and scowls at the world through her mystical lyrics. Everyone adores her. Gemini Prince is the Purple One; he also scowls at the world through his sex-laden, dualistic androgyny. At one point, he even denied his own existence and renamed himself (something I also always do.) And yet, everyone adores him. Morrissey is a Gemini and he’s like the King of Scowling. For some reason, everyone loves Moz. Angelina Jolie, the world’s favorite altruistic sexpot who once wore her ex-husband’s blood in a vial around her neck? Much beloved Gemini.

Danny Elfman, who is known for his childlike yet dark and twisted music? Everyone’s favorite creepy Gemini. All these Gemini celebrities and musicians walk on the shadow side of life, communicating their dazzling talents through the erotic or the wanton or the esoteric and they do it in a way that perpetuates that primal, intoxicating buzz of teen lust. And that’s why a Gemini is so adored.

Just like me, they dance deliriously to the sound of the pan pipes leading them into a forest full of flower-strewn orgies and sequin-studded shoes, consummate teenagers in a state of angst or ecstasy. Dark fairies or genies ready to grant your every wish or impishly antagonize you until they get bored and give up.

But that’s the thing I learned about Geminis, that I should have learned that day when I was ten years old, drawing out my birth chart and plotting to succeed at it no matter how much it confused me. A Gemini never gives up. They pick up the broken skeletal remains of their wings, glue them back together with blood and stardust, and wink at the next person who passes by to hitch a ride, get a job, make-out, or maybe if they’re lucky, all three.

Nadia Noir is a writer that likes black tea, blackberry scones, black cats, the smell of black leather, and the sartorial combo of black and gold. She likes to twerk naked until she’s drenched in sweat and make love to the sounds of psychedelic sitar. She still cries a lot and goes into fits of possessive Scorpionic rage, but her Forever 16 Gemini just pushed her off the bed and told her to shut up and get over herself. She just now got over herself and totally forgot what we were talking about. 

@nadianoir

NEW YEAR, NU YOU: A WORKOUT WITH WINGS

On a mission to shape up? Forget blood type diets and fitness for your body type – work out what otherworldly realm you’ve incarnated from, and find a sweat session that truly feeds your soul says Madeline Giles.

A few years ago, a psychic told me I am an incarnated mermaid. I had no idea what she was talking about, but I obviously wanted to learn more. Were there more incarnated mermaids – or was I the only one on earth? How come I decided to leave merworld? Was it possible to develop a relationship with the mermaids in current space and time?

I somewhat obsessively Googled these thoughts for weeks, but at the time there wasn’t much information on the Internet about this. A few months later, however, I discovered Doreen Virtue’s book Realms of the Earth Angels, which pretty much changed my life. I learned that the realm we come from shapes our personality traits, physical characteristics, likes and dislikes, career, the people we hang out with and beyond.

To my surprise, I also found out there are multiple realms people come from, including incarnated angels, incarnated elementals, incarnated starpeople, the wise one’s (reincarnated witches, wizards, etc.) and various hybrids of the aforementioned. Needless to say, it seemed I had accidentally discovered my passion – and thus have been studying, writing and teaching about realms ever since.

In the spirit of our collective New Year leaning towards personal transformation, I got to thinking what workout with wings would be most motivating based on the unique magical flavor of each specific realm.

But first, find out what realm you’re from by taking the free quiz here.

INCARNATED ANGELS
Pure-hearted incarnated angels tend to be total givers, and thus need a workout that encourages both self-care and, let’s say it together now, RECEIVING! Cue Qoya, which integrates yoga, dance and sensual movement in one magical session. Thanks to free online classes, over-giving incarnated angels can clear stuck energy by hip swaying through all their troubles, their friends’ troubles, their family’s troubles, their neighbor’s troubles, and yes – even the world’s troubles in the comfort of their own home. Incarnated angels who make Qoya a regular priority will find it much easier to give those in need proof of heaven on earth.

 

Image: Anja Verdugo

INCARNATED ELEMENTALS (includes incarnated fairies, pixies, brownies, elves, tree spirits, crystals, etc.)
Earth-loving elementals are happiest while outdoors. Since getting you to follow the rules is near impossible, you’ll have the most fun making your own plans, which will invariably include lots of fresh air and play. You’d enjoy outdoor sports and regular hikes in the woods – just make sure to bring a recyclable bag so you can pick up trash along the way! Your elemental family will be seriously stoked and might even reward you with a gift or wish. If, however, the weather really isn’t conducive to play outdoors, plan to attend a high-vibe freeform dance class (such as 5 Rhythms or Journey Dance). You’ll definitely meet fellow fairy friends who will be so down to go hug some trees with you after class.

 

INCARNATED STARPEOPLE
Earth life can be awkward for you, sweet starperson, but you’ll feel right at home at a Kundalini yoga class– where otherworldy experiences are not only encouraged, they’re expected. Chanting, chakra cleansing, and meditations that sync you with the planets may sound woo woo to some, but to you it feels peculiarly familiar. After you get the hang of Kundalini kriyas, don’t be surprised if you spontaneously start receiving cosmic messages from your galactic family.

 

Image: Daniele & Iango

THE WISE ONES (incarnated sorcerers, high priests/priestesses, witches, wizards, etc.)
Been there, done that is your mantra, oh wise one. You’ve lived on earth so many times, it seems nothing can surprise you. Though some may mistake your wisdom for cynicism, you are the true wayshowers of our world and thus really don’t want (or need) anyone telling you how to best work your muscles, or live your life for that matter. But in case you’re open to suggestions (hold the eye rolls please), a combination of high-intensity classes like kickboxing balanced with routine walking meditations will keep you connected to your powerful healing energy.

 

MERMAIDS
Darling…isn’t it better down where it’s wetter? Mermaids LOVE water and feel most connected to their true essence while swimming (with wild dolphins), surfing, – or my personal favorite – mermaiding! Many mermaids are quite sensitive to the chemicals in chlorine, so whenever possible, choose natural water sources over swimming in pools. Since you tend to get cold easily, be sure to heat up a sea salt bath post-swim to relax and recharge with the magic of your element.

 

 

ATLANTEANS
As an Atlantean, you thrive in like-minded communities where conversations about crystals, pyramids and sacred geometry are the norm. You love your tribe and want to work and play together as often as possible, so starting a belly dancing troop or taking a class with synchronized routines will leave you feeling fulfilled. While tightening your tummy and strengthening your spine, you’ll also get connected to the primal healing energy of Atlantis, which is so what the earth needs right now. Get to it!

 

ALADDINS / GENIES
Nomadic Aladdin, you love all things fire. The desert is your playground, sunsets make you melt and super spicy sauce is a must at every meal. In other words, Bikram yoga was pretty much made for you. You might even consider becoming a teacher, so you can squeeze in serendipitous storytelling (one of your realm gifts) during the 20-second savasanas.

 

SHAPESHIFTERS
We know, dear shapeshifter, you’ll have one of everything! Since the thought of doing the same exercise everyday (or every week, for that matter) makes you cringe, you’d fare best by joining a gym that offers a variety of classes. That way you can aerobicize in the pool, lift weights, flow into Vinyasa, chant affirmations at intenSati, and sweat through spin class all in one day if you really wanted to!

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@mermadeline