WHY VIRGOS ARE SEXIER THAN SCORPIOS

After searching for her lost orgasm in her latest book, Sex Drive, Stephanie Theobald cavorts with fellow Virgo Carine Roitfeld, and discovers why Virgos are sexier than Scorpios …

Carine Roitfeld shot for the Veuve Cliquot Widow series

“Being a Virgo it is all about fantasy. In my head. You know how Virgos are—not so sexual!” As I witnessed former French Vogue editor-turned-stylist, Carine Roitfeld, cavorting with a living latex sex doll in the “Lust” room of her immersive “Widow” series for Veuve Clicquot (theme: The Seven Deadly Sins), I had to step in for an astrological  intervention …

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Virgo vs. Scorpio: kinky phallic tales & ecstatic soil 
Being a Virgo myself, I’ve long endured all that crap about how we’re control freaks who only get off on doing housework. I’m used to swiftly shifting the conversation onto my Chinese sign (the much more amorous-sounding Fire Horse). But, these days I’m out and proud.

In my experience, Scorpios are one-trick ponies. Yes, Scorpios are into extreme passion, but that thunder and lightening sexuality burns out fast to leave a brooding, precarious calm. Think kinky dungeon sex, and a very male, genitalia-focused idea of sexuality: the sting in the phallic tail. But, yawn, there’s only one sting.

Meanwhile, the patriarchal propaganda around Virgo is that she’s a virgin who can’t be sexual without a man. Or, alternatively, that’s she so self-contained and powerful that she doesn’t need a man at all. Yet soil is fertile and rich with an all-encompassing energy. It is constantly ready to bring forth new life, new forms of ecstasy.

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Clitoral strength & the quest for my lost orgasm 
I reminded Carine that Virgos are of the Earth, and thus the most deeply and naturally sexual of all the horoscope signs.

Carine nodded, adding that her partner was a Scorpio, “And you know what they say about Scorpios … But yes, this is an interesting way to look at being a Virgo.”

Our conversation in the Lust room continued a theme from an earlier press conference, where I’d given Carine a bronze clitoris necklace created by Parisian jeweler, Anne Larue. At that event, we discussed my newly finished book, Sex Drive, which is all about how women need to learn how to conjure their sexuality as a life force. Carine picked up the organically-formed clitoris and said, with pure Virgoan instinct, “it is the symbol of female strength, n’est-ce pas?”

Written following an illness that destroyed my orgasm, Sex Drive is my memoir about driving across America in search of this lost pleasure center. But what started as a quest for the ultimate auto-erotic experience became a fantastic voyage into my own body, a way to heal what no western doctor had been able to heal, and a chance to re-build my orgasm from the ground up …

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Taking nature as my lover 
Contrary to the cliché surrounding “Virgo the virgin,” I’m not averse to a little kinky dungeon sex. But one of the discoveries that touched me the most during my drive across America was meeting porn star-turned artist Annie Sprinkles and discovering her idea of Ecosexuality- the notion that we can look at nature as our lover rather than our mother. 

Annie took me on a sensual and thought-provoking “Ecosexy nature walk,” encouraging me to find my “E Spot” (Eco spot) by slapping what really did appear to be butts of trees and sniffing what seemed to be dicks of flowers. I grew up in Cornwall, England, one of the most country bumpkin of all the UK counties, so the crazy hippy Californian shit didn’t seem weird to me. But it also struck me that maybe this was my Virgo side coming out too.

Ecosexy suggests that swinging-from-the-chandeliers type sex doesn’t have to be the ultimate good time. When you tire of human energy, plant energy is a welcome and mysterious boon. Slowing things down and thinking a little out of the box can make sensuality even more exciting – and sustainable.

Carine Roitfeld shot for the Veuve Cliquot Widow series

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Slow seduction & natural witchery  
At the end of the evening, Carine revealed the inspiration behind her lust-themed installation, and her hopes for an evening of “radical feminine energy”: “I am interested in seducing people slowly,” she told me, adding that there should be a balance in everything, even lust.

“Desire is a balance between restraint and provocation. There is something fragile about desire. That is why I made the walls of delicate latex.”

Researching Madame Clicquot for the project, who became a widow at the age of 27 and took over her husband’s champagne business, Carine said she wanted to emphasize female strength and the “magic” that is in the air at this time of year. “I felt the idea of witchcraft and I wanted to destabilize the sense of the ordinary.”

A Scorpio might have seen this mysical talk as a cue for some Alistair Crowley-style Sex Magik kink. But us Virgos took a more natural approach. My birthplace, Cornwall, is known for its witches and “piskies,” so the idea of sorcery and magic have always seemed normal to me.

And fellow Virgo, Carine, was even more playful about the whole thing. “It is fun, no?” she exclaimed to her latex Lady in Red, and back for another round of dancing … 

Stephanie Theobald is a journalist for the Sunday Times, the Guardian and Elle UK. She is also the author of four novels. Sex Drive is her fifth book. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter, and help crowd-fund Sex Drive HERE.

MATERIAL GIRL, MYSTICAL WORLD: MELINDA LEE HOLM

With her custom jewelry prescriptions, Melinda Lee Holm combines her twin passions for crystals and the Tarot—with the wider mission of awakening her clients to a life of personal evolution…

The Numinous: What card and stone best represent your current life #goals? 
Melinda Lee Holm: The Empress and Pyrite. The Empress rules over a richly abundant world that she has created for herself by caring for everything around her with love and encouragement. She is the giver and the protector of life and she revels in her gifts by beaming love out all around her. I dressed as The Empress for Halloween this year, and am focused on actively working to embody her to create a world where we are all loved and treasured for our gifts and we are all safe and cared for.

This election threw me into despair and leaning harder into The Empress is helping to guide me as I step up to act to protect the rights and safety of women, people of color, immigrants, LGBTQ people, Muslims and the poor. And Pyrite is the gas to fuel this action. It supplies confidence, willpower, and motivation and it enhances our innate powers of manifestation. I invite everyone to print out a picture of The Empress and place her in your home as an inspiration and carry a piece of Pyrite!

TN: What came first, jewelry or Tarot, and when did you first combine the two? 
MLH: Tarot came first. I grew up in suburban MN and I was 13 when I got my first deck (the Thoth deck), the accompanying book, and a book on witchcraft. It changed my life. When I started doing readings for myself alone in my bedroom, I remember having this immediate access to a meditative, connected state. I would close my eyes and focus on visualizing white light shooting from my third eye and would be physically rocked by the sensation of being flooded with this magical connection. Looking back, I see baby me doing these vibration-raising rituals and I am so proud of that kid. I had a pretty rough childhood and finding this solace helped me survive with my soul intact.

20 years later I had a friend suffer a sudden and tragic loss. I went to my cards seeking guidance on how to help and as I turned over the cards, a strong aesthetic theme emerged. I felt called to make a necklace with natural stones in colors and numbers corresponding to the cards, and with energies for emotional healing and spiritual connection. As it turned out the colors and numbers were favorites of the loved one who had passed. It was incredibly moving. I knew it was the beginning of something great.

TN: Why does every modern woman need a talisman? 
MLH: Because self-adornment is an ancient sacred act. By wearing a talisman, we connect to our lineage of ancestors who adorned and anointed themselves with oils, scents, clothing, and jewelry imbued with magical power and purpose. In our contemporary culture, we are removed from this process and instead offered mass-produced items we have little to no energetic connection with. Wearing a personal talisman is a silent yet radical act of self-assertion and reconnection with the earth and with our ancestors.

TN: What themes are most common among your clients, and what stones do you use to address them? 
MLH: The culture we live in means there are a lot of blockages around communication and balancing work and play, especially for women. So I often use Aquamarine to open clear communication with oneself and others and to soothe anxiety, Green Tourmaline to re-connect with the heart, and Garnet to ignite a passion for building dreams in a realistic, grounded manner.

I also work a lot on balancing the elements, which isn’t something I set out to do. For example, if someone has a ton of Fire and Water going on, but little Earth or Air, they are likely to feel exhausted from a lack of grounding, and frustrated and possibly even despairing that their message is being misunderstood. In this case, I would pay close attention to the elemental attributes of stones. There are so many levels to a reading. It’s what makes my work incredibly interesting and fulfilling.

TN: What’s your favorite way to cleanse and charge your crystals? 
MLH: I’m a huge fan of Selenite, a purifier and spiritual activator that I find to be extremely effective. I have big slabs of it in my studio and every jewelry piece I make gets a nap on the Selenite before it goes home. I also keep a piece with my personal jewelry. My pieces are also blessed with Palo Santo as I ask them to work with the client’s guides, angels, and ancestors to carry their energy to where it is most needed.

For my personal collection of crystals, I do a water rinse once a month on the Full Moon and then roll the cart (it’s a big collection!) over to the window to soak in the moonlight overnight. I also give them a really good smudge when I do my weekly house cleansing.

:: MATERIAL GIRL ::

My label
I’m living for everything Michele Alessandro makes for Gucci. If I could buy it all I would, but instead I admire it from afar and buy vintage. I’m crazy about vintage clothing for stylistic and environmental reasons.

Gucci AW16

My shoes
Oxfords and sneakers. I’m tall, I have foot issues, and I’m a HUGE fan of a butch shoe look.

Saint Laurent sneakers, $595, Net-a-porter.

My fragrance
Tea rose oil – opens the heart and smells amazing.

Tea Rose Oil, from $14, Body Time.

My jewels
I’m constantly making myself things depending on what I’m feeling, but I always wear the gold Sigil necklace from my collection, piles of rings, and a piece of Black Tourmaline somewhere to keep my energetic field clear.

Sigal necklace, from $175, Melinda Lee Holm.

My pampering
A soak, a scrub, and a hot stone bibimbap at the Korean spa.

My home
A purple house filled with crystals, art, music, and animals in beautiful Los Angeles.

My food
All of it. Everything. I love food. That hot stone bibimbap at the spa may be my favorite, but it would be really hard to choose.

 

:: MYSTICAL WORLD ::

My awakening 
It’s ongoing. I think we all need to focus on being in a state of constant spiritual awakening until we’re dead. Not doing so assumes we’ve gotten as close as we can or as we care to the Divine. I’m greedy. I want as much expansion and evolution as I can get in this lifetime.

My sign
Cancer Sun, Virgo Ascendant, Taurus Moon, year of the Fire Snake.

My mantra
“This time will pass”—it works to soothe during the lows, and as a reminder to really be present and soak in the highs. It relates very closely to the Wheel of Fortune card, which offers an additional comfort of being looked after by the Universe.

My healer
As with all of us, ultimately myself—with and assistance from guides here on Earth and in the Spirit realm.

My reading
I always go back to Angela Davis, Joseph Campbell, and many, many metaphysical texts.

My mission
To empower and inspire as many people as I can to commit to a life of constant personal evolution.

Discover more about Melinda Lee Holm and her work, and schedule a Prescription Adornments consultation at Melindaleeholm.com

MATERIAL GIRL, MYSTICAL WORLD: SATYA JEWELRY

Satya Jewelry is the ultimate high vibe jewelry line; it’s founder, Satya Scainetti, is the ultimate inspiration when it comes to working with your dharma…

Satya Scainetti at home in Manhattan

“The idea of stepping away from life to find all the answers…like Jesus and Buddha found enlightenment when they quit? There’s a lot to that…”

Satya Scainetti, a born-and-bred New Yorker, was gifted her spiritual name on graduating a 30-day yoga teacher training in 2000. Disillusioned with her career in social work, she found herself at a crossroads; gifted with a talent for reiki, “I was like, okay God, if this is what you want from me I’m good to go, but I’ve also got to make money…”

And so, perhaps the yoga training would lead to a bone fide practise as a healer. But on that same graduation night she also had a prophetic dream. In it, she learned that it was her dharma to create a line of spiritual jewelry also named Satya, meaning “all truth,” so she could then “donate money to children all around the world.” Within weeks, Satya Jewelry was born, and over the past decade has given over $1 million to countless children’s charities.

I first encountered Satya’s line at NYC’s Golden Bridge yoga studio (she was one of the original investors in the kunadlini institution), and was pretty much blown away by the downright numinosity of it all! Super chic pieces that wouldn’t look out of place in the pages of Vogue, but that also carried a deeply spiritual message.

The Mandala necklace: “a reminder of the sacred place we can always go”

“My whole intention is for people to find a piece that speaks to them – be it a symbol, or a healing stone they intuitively know they need. Which is mind-blowing, because we do know…I encourage my customers to trust that intuition, that knowingness. If you’re drawn to something, there’s a reason.”

The notion of dharma, life purpose that comes from a desire to be of service, is emerging all around as the resounding theme for 2015, and Satya’s story embodies this message.

“The awakening I had when this business took off was that that you can have everything – just make sure the intention is for the good of all. Then the Universe will open every door needed to make your dreams come true!” The key, then, is to think big. “We limit ourselves all the time. We say, ‘THIS is my goal, if I get THERE it will be enough,’ but we need to be open to what the Universe actually has in store for us.”

Satya, you are an inspiration among women! Read on for how this Material Girl totally rocks her Mystical World…

:: MA T E R I A L G I R L ::

MY LABEL
I’m a clothes fiend. I love Club Monaco, BCBG, and I’m a big Zara fan. I have a tonne of DVF’s dresses. Max Mara. I love Donna Karan. Handbags? Marc Jacobs, hands down.

Donna Karan Summer 2015

MY SHOES
You put a pair of heels on, everything changes – I love what it does to my body, and it gives me confidence! My favorites are Jimmy Choo and Christian Louboutin. I actually met him in Paris. I was there with a friend who went to school with him, and bought my first pair in the store on the Rue du Faubourg Saint-Honoré. They were orgasmically beautiful. That same night we end up bumping into him and going for tea! I was like, do we get the friends and family discount now?

Christian Louboutin python “So Kate” pumps

MY FRAGRANCE
Florabotanica by Balenciaga. We did a trunk sale at Bloomies and this woman had a bunch of samples. It’s musky but light.

Florabotanica by Balenciaga

MY JEWELRY
I’m a mala fiend because I believe in the power of the mala. I was wearing my black onyx mala around the time my kids were born, twin boys. Black onyx is the stone of endurance, and I was so drawn to it! It’s all I wore for two years. Starting the business I wore all green – which is the heart chakra – because it was all coming from there. I also buy a lot of ornate Indian jewelry, but it’s all at home in my box.

Mala by Satya Jewelry

 

MY PAMPERING
I’m a Lumiere girl, I spend more money on that cream than I want to but I’m addicted! I must have a pedicure, even in the winter, every ten days, and I get a massage every week from David at Think Pink Nails in the West Village. I call him my Sumo wrestler. He does the energy work, the stones, and he’s so strong that one hour just puts it all back into place.

MY FOOD
I’m a vegetarian…but I’m also Italian, so I love pasta! Yoga has helped me eat more mindfully, so I know when to stop – but at the same time I’ll totally binge on something like pizza when I want it. Italians are brought up that food is love, and I’m always telling my kids; ‘I put a little extra love and kisses in your dinner tonight, do you taste it?’

MY HOME
My home is beautiful. Everything is very zen, I have an amazing garden with Buddhas and a sun-room with a beautiful canopy bed. I’m into cosy homes, I’ve got one of those couches that puts people to sleep. For me, home is where I can take a breath and feel relaxed, where I can really not be ‘on’ – because I’m on a lot.

Golden Buddha snow globe from ABC Carpet & Home

:: M Y S T I C A L W O R L D ::

MY AWAKENING
Everybody sleeps in my bed right now, the dogs, the kids…it’s a king, thank god, but it’s very crowded because they’re getting big! And before we get out of bed we start the day with gratitude, and name two things we’re grateful for – it’s so important to start the day that way, because from that place everything just gets better.

Gratitude Journal from Catchingfireflies.com

MY SIGN
I’m a Capricorn – strong, and one of the most devoted friends you’ll ever have. Truly, if you have me as a friend, you are blessed. I am very good at business, but I’m also ruled by the heart. I see astrology as a guide. I don’t have a therapist, but I do have an astrologer – when you’re aware of what’s happening in your chart, you can start being directed with where you put your energy. I have a great guy called David, who helped with the launch of this company. It was plotted down to the day.

Capricorn pendent by Satya Jewelry

MY MANTRA
I have so many! But for right now? I feel like I’m at an exciting point of change, so it’s simple: ‘help me be open to what’s next.’

MY HEALER
God! He’s it. I’m a believer.

MY READING
I’m a big fan of Thich Nhat Hanh. His teachings are so user friendly for the real world, and simply show how to incorporate more happiness in your life. His book on relationships, Teachings on Love, lays out such a beautiful way to live your life, and if I could pick one book to start you on a new journey that would be it.

MY MISSION
Right now it’s to build my brand to a place where I can really make a huge difference in the world. The $1m-plus we’ve given already is a drop in the ocean of what I want to do, so the next 13 years I’ll be amping up the work I do with my foundation, keeping the focus on helping children. The next generations will be the ones to make a difference in the world, and I’m going to help them do that.

MY TRANSFORMATION
My transformation is through my practise of meditation and yoga, and using it to really tap into God. Whatever you want to call it, I mean that knowingness that’s inside all of us.

www.satyajewelry.com

@satyajewelry